An Exercise in Emotional Intelligence

“He did what?” Racing over to the banquet, with proof in hand, I would walk up to the stage just as the degenerate was beginning his acceptance speak and decry his foul deed in front of the audience, his family, and the distinguished panel; at which point his family would turn their back on the cheater, the panel would have the police called, the miscreant arrested, and the award would be handed to me, the rightful winner to the cheers of the audience and the adoration of my family, friends, and fans. While this response would never happen, the fantasy would likely run through my head upon learning that another had won a prestigious award based on plagiarism of my work. The reality would quite likely be different, because at the ripe, young, age of 43, I have dealt with a variety of experiences that have tested both my intelligence and my emotional intelligence. Faced with the difficult situation of a competitor’s theft of my work, significant emotional labor and emotional intelligence would be required, but with a calm, poised, and reasoned response, a positive outcome is probable.

When first given the news by a friend, the first challenge is to control the reaction. In my role as a business executive, I frequently find myself in situations where emotional control is required, a customer meeting where a significant deal is lost, or a key relationship is at risk, or an internal meeting where other executives are attempting to take over the organization I serve. Long ago, those kinds of situations would result in outbursts, or at a minimum, in body language that let everyone around know what I thought. Coaching and experience have taught me to stop, listen, and ask questions. The act of curiosity allows time to absorb mea...

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... in those moments, when all demeanors flee, when we are most human.

Works Cited

Barsade, S. G. (2002). The Ripple Effect: Emotional Contagion and Its Influence on Group Behavior. Administrative Science Quarterly, 47(4), 644-675.

Goleman, D. (1995). Emotional intelligence. New York: Bantam Books.

Goleman, D., Boyatzis, R. E., & McKee, A. (2002). Primal leadership : realizing the power of emotional intelligence. Boston, Mass.: Harvard Business School Press.

Kinicki, A., & Kreitner, R. (2008). Organizational behavior : key concepts, skills & best practices (3rd ed.). Boston: McGraw-Hill Irwin.

Lublin, J. S. (2004, March 2, 2004). Surviving the Pressure With a Ready Plan Or, Literally, a Script, The Wall Street Journal Online, pp. 1-3. Retrieved from http://research.uvu.edu/management/mcarthur/Employment help/2Mar04-WSJ-Surviving Job Pressure With a Plan.pdf