Tough Love is a phrase coined by Bill Milliken meaning an expression used when someone treats another person harshly or sternly with the intent to help them in the long run. (Insert citation) Tough love is used in many forms today and evidence show that it can be beneficial in the development of a preferred character trait in children as well as adults. Often a child is confused on what love actually is because when tough love is being displayed it is an act of punishment but is called tough love in fact tough love does not work in the manner it is intended for but as an act of fear. Tough love was intended for drug addicts and people with addiction, not for children who are still learning the ways of life. For a parent to use the phrase …show more content…
Authoritarian Parenting Authoritarian parenting traits include: being high demanding, low acceptance and tolerance of their child. Studies also show that this is not the most effective way to parent. They expect absolute obedience and the child typically is very good at following rules; however they lack self- discipline. (About Education 2015) these types of parents also forget to allow their children explore and learn and to be independent, leading them to never be able to set their own limits and standards. “Diana Baumrind, a developmental psychologist, says that this type of parenting is a harsh, rigid emotional climate is a low parental responsiveness (the nurturing aspect of the child) and high demandingness (control over the child).” …show more content…
They feel pressure to conform at any situation and tend to become social withdraws. The children tend to develop a fear of failure due to the consequences they will face from authority. This children are also very angry frustrated and resentful and usually take those bad character traits into adulthood. Authoritarian parenting also leads the child to be more rebellious in some cases or causes them to act out when not in the presence of a parent.
"The Positive Parenting Centre 's" Perspective believes that parents should try positive discipline approaches where their child feels valued and also respected. They believe that the child should have some opinion in the way they are discipline and says that this helps regulate independence, self motivation and overall a better relationship between the parent and the child.
Also in today’s society, authoritarian parenting is consider unhealthy and the wrong way of parenting because the parents were raised this way and how they are trying to inflict the way they were brought up on their child is said to not be a successful task because of social change. Meaning that what worked back then will not work now.
Permissive
However, in this type of parenting style, authoritative parents are more responsive to their child, more willing to listen to questions and more forgiving rather than punishing when their child fail to meet expectations. These parents are more supportive, rather than punitive, also, they focus on making their child confident and socially responsible.(Baumrind, 1966). In authoritarian parenting style, children are expected to follow the strict rules and regulation established by the parents. The parents are too demanding and directive but not really responsive towards their children. They are also status-orientated and children are expected to obey their rules without any explanations (Baumrind, 1991). Then, there is the permissive parenting style in which the parents rarely discipline their child because they have low expectations of maturity and self-regulation. Permissive parent is more responsive, non-traditional and lenient towards their child. They are nurturing and very open with their child (Baumrind, 1991). Lastly, neglectful parenting style is those parents who have both low demandingness and responsiveness towards their children. These parents are generally detached from their child’s life and in some cases; they may even reject or neglect their child’s needs (Maccoby & Martin,
The problem with some methods of parenting is the effects that they can have on the child; therefore, it is so important to fully understand the differences between parenting styles. Authoritarian parenting is when the parent demands their child to obey them, no matter the circumstances. This type of parenting
Fortunately, children do not need “perfect” parents. They do need mothers and fathers who will think on their feet and who will be thoughtful about what they have done. They do need parents who can be flexible, and who can use a variety of approaches to discipline.” - James L. Hymes, Jr. This quote, I can say, is physically very true.
A parenting style that focuses on responding to a child’s behaviors but also focuses on not being too demanding or aggressive. Permissive parenting can be another for of parenting that leads to harmful results on the child or minor. Another term for permissive parenting is indulgent parenting. These parents have a tendency to be tolerant while attempting to maintain a strategic distance from any confrontation with their child. The advantage of this parenting style is that they are normally exceptionally sustaining and cherishing. The negatives, be that as it may, exceed this advantage. Hardly any guidelines are set for the offspring of tolerant parents, and the principles are conflicting when they do exist. This absence of structure makes these children grow up with minimal self-control and poise. A few parents receive this strategy as an extraordinary inverse way to deal with their dictator childhood, while others are just hesitant to do anything that may annoy their kid. It might appear as if this would be a child’s most loved parenting style as it gives a feeling of flexibility without results, in any case, childrens hunger for a feeling of structure to influence them to feel safe and. It is critical in a child’s improvement for there to be obvious parental and child positions that are played. Tolerant or permissive parenting can have long haul harming impacts on
Most studies show that children from authoritarian families may be somewhat well-behaved. But they also tend to be less resourceful, have poorer social skills, and lower self-esteem. Compared with children from authoritative households, children exposed to authoritarian discipline may also achieve less at school.
This style of parenting is best described as the child having more control over the parent. There are a lot of parents today that seem to have no control of their child actions and even words. This in which can make the parents question what are they doing wrong when it comes to raising their child. This type of parent have very low demands and are highly responsive, maybe even too responsive to the child’s needs. Although these parents are very loving of their children they do not have many rules that their child should abide by (Cherry, K. 2017, para.1). Not setting ground rules gives the child the freedom to do whatever they want and know that they will not receive a harsh, if any punishment at all. Also, parents who are permissive tend to want to be their child’s best friend. The child in this parent in child relationship tends to have more control than the parent. If there are not any rules in place to be followed the child will eventually resort to negative behaviors, and may even be insure because of the low discipline from their parents (Cherry, K. 2017, para. 9). Permissive parents should give the child rules to follow and discipline them if broken, to ensure that their child follow the right path throughout
The authoritarian parenting style is the stricter style. Parents who use this method have strict limits set and show little or no love. The most common reason for parents using this method is that they don't want their children being failures. So, parents as such will shame and blames, punish, and tease their child. As sick as this sounds studies show parents using this method are usually successful. When a child is punished or blamed he or she is said to learn what not to do, feel guilty, and avoid from making such mistakes again. Punishments include spankings, timeouts, and taking something of value from the child. Parents who use this method demand respect, allow no questioning or arguing, and want full compliance. One can tell that a parent is like this because they themselves are demanding and have some type of anger issues. The authoritarian parenting style is common is Asian countries such as India, China, Thailand and many more Eastern countries. This method is very rarely seen used in the States or Canada. This style is sometimes used without the parent even knowing it. Usually when a parent is irritated or upset they will tend to be more strict a...
First, authoritarian parents are the ones with the most rules, they establish them and the child is expected to follow them without exceptions. This cause the child to view things only the way the parents say and having very little room for involvement in problem-solving tasks.
These two styles; authoritarian, and permissive both have deleterious results that are often visible throughout different developmental stages, such as rebellious behavior. As well each style has its own advantages such as; acceptance by peers with commonality. Child rearing for most parents is an evolving set of skills. It could be said that, with any style of parenting, there is no explicit set of rules for every situation, and what works for one child may not be effective for another. Even though authoritarian and permissive parenting may have some minor similarities they are remarkably different from one another in their approach to raising children.
The first type of parenting style is called authoritarian. In this parenting style the parents are the boss. They make strict rules and they enforce them. They focus more on restrictions than a loving relationship with their child. They believe it is their job as parents to catch their children being bad and punish them. These parents use external control on their children instead of taking time to tell the kid what they did wrong and why they should not do it again. Something these parents do not realize is that they do not catch their kids being good. Authoritarian parents are firm and unsympathetic. Authoritarian parents love to use discipline.
When tough love is correctly used , it can be to effective way in the household dealing with a troubled teen. Katryn Rudlin points out “Unfortunately, in some cases these concepts have been used inappropriately and in the name of 'tough love' teens have been abused or kicked out of their home, approaches that clearly go against the tough love philosophy.”
Authoritarian parents, show very little acceptance, have very high expectations of their children and are extremely controlling. These parents are strict, and use a prohibitive and punishment method. According to a research done by Kimberly Kopko from Cornell University, it “reveals that adolescents of authoritarian parents learn that following parental rules and adherence to strict discipline is valued over independent behavior. As a result, adolescents may become rebellious or dependent” (2). The adolescents who come to be rebellious may showcase hostile behaviors, while those who are passive are likely to stay relying on their parents (2).
The authoritarian style of parenting is control focused and militaristic in approach. This parent has high expectations and demands strict obedience. They often rule by fear and punishment. Dr. Gwen Dewar states, “… Little nurturing, lots of psychological control” (Dewar). On Consistant-parenting-advice.com the author communicates this type of parenting can result in abusive discipline that can be emotional and physical; however this writer is also including verbal abuse to the list.
...ues come with a lot more disadvantages then advantages. Children of authoritarian parents are unhappy, and have low in self-esteem. They receive poor grades in school and they become bullies. These children become dependent and they have a very poor relationship with their parents because they are scared of them.
Authoritarian-parents who are punitive and focus on gaining a child's obedience to parental demands rather than responding to the demands of the child.Authoritarian parenting styles give little to no options to a child. What the parent says goes. It is a rigid approach to raising children that may have been most effective in times of great famine or toil. It was used most commonly in large, traditional families in which the father was the patriarch, and everyone else was called to follow his command. Times have changed greatly since. Doctors see a problem with this approach in modern times,it creates a distance between parent and child in which the child doubts the parent's love for him. It is based on punishment, which can easily create anger.