What is forgiveness? Is it forgiving yorself? Is it forgiving the person who hurt you? Tony Robbins the famous life coach once said” Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself”. The quote that Tony Robbins said made me open my eyes and made me realize the mistakes I have done in the past. It was a beautiful day bright and sunny, it was the the last week of 6th grade. I was going home like always on the bus minding my own business. When I heard a friend of mine saying rude words to a student with special needs and I just saw her crying in the corner of my eye. So I told her the girl with special needs to walk away. The girl that was being extremely rude pulled my hair and dropped me so violently that I scraped my elbows and hit my chin.
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Show MoreLife as we all know is full of disappointment and filled with disparity. Most of us are able to go through these and learn from and forgive ourselves. Yet, this isn’t always the case. People are faced with traumatic experiences that often take a long time to get over, if they ever do get over it. These experiences brew in our brain popping up at the most random points often bringing our spirits down. Although these experiences may scar us and fill us with regret and guilt, we can’t continue to live in the past and let these regrets haunt us. Self forgiveness is a key to healing and to moving on in life, no matter how hard it is.
One aphorism that hit me is “To learn to forgive yourself and to forgive others”. I had a few people in my life that had hurt me so much that I hated them. But, I was so miserable that I was not happy. I prayed to God to help me forgive them, a little by little I learned to forgive myself and then forgive them.
Forgiveness comes in many different points of views, it is not just a word but it’s how you see it mentally, feel it emotionally, and must acquire for yourself to move forward and be happier. In an interview that I saw on youtube with world famous writer Elizabeth Gilbert, she asserted that, “We forgive ourselves and not abuse ourselves for what we didn’t know as it was happening”. I agree with her assertion because everyone does make wrong choices at times and should remember the most important thing is, you must forgive yourself before you can identify what else is needed to be forgiven. Whether it is an unfaithful partner, a past decision or a mistake which had lead you to failure and forgiveness is what we must acquire to live a happier life.
Justice and forgiveness are two topics that are interpreted differently by many people. Many people forgive, but many other people only seek justice. They can’t go hand-in-hand together though. People are not capable of forgiving while they also seek justice toward a person. Forgiveness is led by sorrow to a person while justice is revenge based. Many who seek justice can not resist the temptation of revenge but those who seek to forgive show strength by doing the right thing.
Forgiveness is a process. You can still feel the pain, see the events behind your eyes, and feel the loss of the people around you but you have to find a way to forgive. People think that if you forgive someone you are forgetting or saying hey I would hang out with this person now because we’re cool but thats not at all what forgiveness is. Forgiveness is righting the wrong for yourself because you want the injustice you feel to leave. It’s acknowledging to that there a wrong that was done to you and you decide how you want to think about it not anyone
Tony Robbins is one of the most well known motivational speakers. Not only is he a motivational speaker, he is a model for others looking to change their lives. With his many programs and seminars, it puts Tony at the top of the charts. Tony had many challenges as a child, but overcame them with motivation, and is giving that chance back to communities. Tony Robbins has a career based upon motivating others, and is a life coach who is driven by helping others through emotionally difficult times, donating to many charities, and looking at life in a different, more positive way.
Forgiveness is the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feeling and attitude regarding an offense; let’s go of negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender. Walter (1984) stated that forgiveness is a voluntary process that usually requires courage and multiple acts of the will to complete. In Walters' view, the person who has been hurt has two alternatives: to be destroyed by resentment which leads to death, or to forgive which leads to healing and life. Sonja Lyubomirsky calls forgiveness is a natural resolution of the grief process, which is the necessary acknowledgment of pain and loss. It is a powerful choice that can lead to greater well being and better relationships.
To begin with, forgiveness is when the motivation for you to move on from the upsetting or angry moment. Some may say they need some type of honesty or karma to happen to see why they should forgive them. To elaborate, forgiveness is for yourself if you do not need proof to see they will get what they deserve. To exemplify, “I don’t need proof, I have faith.’ Simon Birch. Therefore, why would you need proof when all you need to know is that it is for you and that that person is human and makes mistakes just like you; no one is perfect. When you stay stuck on hating or being upset it
Forgiveness is empathy. I believe it means, putting ones self in the position of the other person, and wiping away any sort of resentment and antagonism we feel toward them. Forgiveness is a journey to freedom. Forgiveness works directly on the emotion of anger, resentment, hostility, and hatred by diminishing its intensity or level within the mind and heart. Only the one who is wronged can forgive.
“When you initially forgive, it is like letting go of a hot iron. There is initial pain and the scars will show, but you can start living again.” –Stephen Richards
"Cut your hair, already", some fifth graders said as they pushed me against the hard brick wall. I tried to argue with them, but then one of them punched me in the gut. I fell to the ground crying. I remember feeling so confused, trying to figure out what had I done to them.
Forgiveness is freedom. There is a key that opens the door to healing, happiness and peace, that key is forgiveness. Forgiveness starts from you and it is the greatest gift you can give yourself. Forgiveness of both self and others is the most powerful tool we have, and it is readily attainable to all of us .Take a step of creating a kinder humanity by forgiving someone in your life. If you are convinced and ready to forgive, you may be wondering where to start. My suggestion is to start small by letting go of the grudges, bitterness and anger.
Forgiveness is the act of releasing an offender of any wrong or hurt they may have caused you whether they deserve it or not. It is a decision to let go of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group of people. When we choose to forgive, we’re wiping the slate clean, cancelling a debt, or as I love to say, “Letting it go.” In the Bible, the Greek word for forgiveness literally means to “let it go.” This concept, “forgiveness,” is easier said than done. Majority of people find it very difficult to let go of offenses and hurts caused by others. I really do believe that most people desire to let it go, but we lack the knowledge of how to do it. As believers, we are instructed by God maintain an attitude of forgiveness.
The benefits of forgiveness are for you and not for the other person. You probably already know this, but it's worth repeating. I don't know of anyone who hasn't been hurt a time or two, but forgiveness is essential to our well-being.
A strong Christian lesson on the true nature of forgiveness can be found in Christ’s Sermon on the Mount: