Accepting negative and positive feedback can be something someone can take in a good or bad way. So why is it that most people avoid criticism? Well that’s because in most cases it can either make you work harder or make you not want to try at all. In the majority of times criticism is meant to be something positive to try and encourage you to be better. Ideally, it brings balance into our lives, provides us with a basis of comparison, and brings truth, honesty, and intimacy. Hopefully, it gives us honest feedback-a balance of praise and criticism. Criticism has always been a huge past of my life being the middle child and when you have voice lessons and have been singing since diapers. I think it wasn’t till I was older and more mature
When taking their opinion to perspective you can improve yourself in a positive way, criticism from many people are better taken when that person has s higher self-esteem and has tough skin. This is proven by most people who have a good self-esteem and feel confident about themselves, why? Well because when someone has an opinion of how you do certain things that’s an opportunity to grow and better themselves instead of seeing it in an offensive
Studies can show many ways of how to deal with criticism but what you have to take from it is positive-ness as long as you’re positive then what is there to hold you back or hold you back? I realize criticism doesn’t always come gently from someone legitimately trying to help. A lot of the feedback we receive is unsolicited. Maybe there’s a lesson in every criticism, if only we’re willing to find it. We can’t control what other people will say to us. But we can control how we internalize it, respond to it, and learn from it, and when we release it and move on. Dealing with criticism from others is tough, but you have a choice about how to deal with it. It can be discouraging when your boss sends your work back to you with revisions and changes all over it, but those are your best opportunities to get
It could also be a parent at home criticizing you about a grade to do better in school. When a coach would say something to me that would sting, it would motivate me to do better. I would notice when the coach would say the same thing to a team mate they would get upset and cry. I never understood why they would not just better themselves, instead of pouting over a simple criticism. This is because of differential sensitivity. Differential sensitivity is “the idea that some people are more vulnerable than others to particular experiences” (Berger, 2010, p.21). I was able to take this criticism from the coach because I was used to having someone at home, criticizing my weaknesses, so that I could better myself. When someone criticizes me, I do not take it to heart because I work harder on that subject to show them that I can do better. The other team mate was more sensitive in the situation and took it to heart. This may have been because the team mate was going through a sensitivity period. Some small comments to children can still affect them later in life, but some may forget about it an hour later. Differential sensitivity is used to, “aid prediction and thus target intervention” (Berger, 2010,
For instance, after Romeo met Juliet, he quickly went to Friar Lawrence for advice. Granted, the Friar’s ideas were not always very smart, however, on first notice, he did try to bring some perspective and slow them down. When Friar Lawrence became aware of Romeo’s sudden change of heart, he exclaimed, “Holy Saint Francis, what a change is here! Is Rosaline, whom thou didst love so dear, So soon forsaken? young men's love then lies Not truly in their hearts, but in their eyes. (Shakespeare 2.3.1125) In this scene, the Friar gave Romeo a needed wake-up call, trying to make the boy aware of his fickle emotions. Romeo was head over heels for Juliet, and yet never even stopped loving Rosaline. He needed someone to snap him out of it and fortunately, the Friar tried to do so. However, correction is only useful when given by a loved one, so some may counter my opinion by saying that negative opinions can bring someone’s morale extremely low. For example, a young girl may see a billboard with a woman who has a body unlike hers, and so she begins to unhealthily strive to become that. This is a real situation and I agree, but to say that all other opinions are null is not wise. Some people may even carry thoughts about us that are really encouraging and uplifting that we can only take in if we ask for their thoughts. In addition to encouraging us, other people who are looking at a situation with fresh eyes may see something important that we did
When someone asks “do you mind if I offer you some feedback?”, you immediately think that you did something terribly wrong. You don’t know whether to feel proud or to feel ashamed, or even feel like you’ve been attacked and need to defend yourself as much as possible. Difficulty with accepting criticism is nothing new; in fact, it is more common than you think. We are often criticized after completing anything from simple tasks to the most complex projects we can accomplish. Common examples of what we are criticized for are: work ethic, creative works such as music, television, articles, etc., and for any mistake, small or large, we make during our day-to-day lives. Anybody can give constructive
When many people write, including myself, they get attached to their writing. Although writing can be a personal thing, I’ve learned that it is important to step away from your paper, and take the feedback on an objective level. The first time I got feedback, I had an overwhelming urge to defend myself. I remember reading that my introduction wasn’t complete, and that my evidence wasn’t properly introduced. I wanted to walk up to those who critiqued my paper, and spit right in their faces. ‘How dare they say bad things about my paper?’ I thought to myself. From here, I went back into my essay, and looked at what they had told me were errors. It was then that I realized that they were right. My introduction needed more background information, and my evidence should have had more of an introduction. They weren’t trying to be mean; they were just helping me receive a better grade, by looking at my essay through an objective view. Now, I go out of my way to ask people for feedback, and tell them to be honest. I want my paper to be the very best it can be, so it isn 't helpful when people hold back. I now understand that those giving feedback aren’t insulting me, or the paper; they are just suggesting ways to improve, or enhance my ideas. Giving and receiving feedback is a hard, yet important skill to learn, and hope to continue improving in this
Her research has shown that daughters describe a mother’s criticism as “ a magnifying glass held between the sun rays … concentration the rays of imperfection” (971). But for a mother a criticism is just a way to help her daughter improve. As sighted by Deborah “ Mothers subject their daughters to a level of scrutiny people usually reserve for themselves.” Meaning a mother will be a tough critic not because their daughter does not please them, but because a mother only wants what is best for their daughter.
Humans are imperfect. It 's crucial and enlightening to step out of ourselves once a while and look back as a third person. Solicit and appreciate honest feedback that shows us our weaknesses, so that we can work on it to be real, not perfect. However, for some of us, it 's not easy and I understand it. It 's not about how senior we are, how rich we are or even how talented we are, but it 's about how real we are to accept the fact that we are still imperfect.
I can handle constructive criticism very well. If I do something wrong then I would rather someone fix what I'm doing then to keep doing it wrong. I don't get sad, I am perfectly fine if someone fixes my mistakes. I don't take it personally and I know that I'm not perfect. I understand the benefits of getting feedback.
The toughest challenge that I ever faced is to stop being a perfectionist all the time. I have high standards for myself and I don’t expect any less than that. I must admit I am my hardest critic. Whenever I start anything I always tend to put everything I have in it. There are times where I even sacrificed sleep just to make sure everything was perfect. I overcame this challenge by allowing myself to relax and realizing that there are times when I can put myself first. I have used this experience to my advantage by setting limits. I don’t necessarily settle when it comes to my work, in fact I am never truly satisfied in it. However I am able to stop going overboard and causing unnecessary stress on
I have been blessed with many leaders and pillars in my life that challenge me daily. My parents, teachers, community leaders, and even figures in my church all know they can openly challenge my ideas. I try not to take constructive criticism as a put down; but rather as a compliment.
There is criticism occurring in our everyday life, and sometimes we are the ones doing it unconsciously. One good example of something being constantly criticized would be films. The public always seems to seek out criticism of film to see if they are going to get their money’s worth. The videos “Honest Trailers- Frozen” and “Honest Trailers- 300” are based on criticism towards both the film and the director.
In Anatomy of Criticism, author Northrop Frye writes of the low mimetic tragic hero and the society in which this hero is a victim. He introduces the concept of pathos saying it “is the study of the isolated mind, the story of how someone recognizably like ourselves is broken by a conflict between the inner and outer world, between imaginative reality and the sort of reality that is established by a social consensus” (Frye 39). The hero of Hannah W. Foster’s novel, The Coquette undoubtedly suffers the fate of these afore mentioned opposing ideals. In her inability to confine her imagination to the acceptable definitions of early American female social behavior, Eliza Wharton falls victim to the ambiguity of her society’s sentiments of women’s roles. Because she attempts to claim the freedom her society superficially advocates, she is condemned as a coquette and suffers the consequences of exercising an independent mind. Yet, Eliza does not stand alone in her position as a pathetic figure. Her lover, Major Sanford -- who is often considered the villain of the novel -- also is constrained by societal expectations and definitions of American men and their ambition. Though Sanford conveys an honest desire to make Eliza his wife, society encourages marriage as a connection in order to advance socially and to secure a fortune. Sanford, in contrast to Eliza, suffers as a result of adhering to social expectations of a male’s role. While Eliza suffers because she lives her life outside of her social categorization and Sanford falls because he attempts to maneuver and manipulate the system in which he lives, both are victims of an imperfect, developing, American society.
Criticism is something that we all deal with daily and many of us believe that when we give criticism we are expertly doing so but as we receive criticism we tend to believe the other person is degrading us personally. Since criticism is mainly to judge merits and faults of a person or their actions, it is natural for us to feel defensive as we act the way we do based on the knowledge we have and we feel that the criticism questions our knowledge. Many of us may see criticism as such and act defensively towards it but according to an article called Giving and Receiving Criticism the author Sue Hadfield states, “Constructive criticism, however, can be helpful and lead to better working relations.” (Hadfield, 2013) With this in mind we can process that criticism can be used to give feedback to better ones position or knowledge in that which is being criticized. But how do we give criticism while staying in the favor of the criticized and when receiving criticism how do we differentiate between constructive and destructive criticism? Continuing in the article the author presents certain...
People who are criticized tend to go in the opposite direction from where the feedback
Irrespective of our imperfections we are unique and have our own strengths. We should appreciate all the positives and uniqueness. Give credit where it 's due. We all need help from each other. We need critics too. Let 's thank those who encourage us and also to those who disagree with us, help us find our imperfections and weaknesses. As we grow older and learn more, we don 't worry about receiving, but rather strive for giving it back. Let it be the best of our work, knowledge or even a few words of appreciation. Keep giving it and keep sharing it with others.
Everyone thinks negatively, it is human nature, but if one thinks negative all the time, maybe they should consider changing their perspective to help guide them into a positive life-style. Negative thinking patterns can lead to many different thoughts, “what if” thoughts, continuously ruminating the scene in their head, making it worse and more difficult to move on, assumptions start to build, the individual begins to think, “this should have happened like this” or “it must be like this”, overreacting, etc. Someone with a negative mindset might say it is impossible to change the way they view things, or “this is how I am”, but overcoming the stubbornness is the first step. “Developing an optimistic outlook