Freezer Burn Monologues

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It’s Monday night, and you just got home from work.

You’re too exhausted to actually cook a decent meal, so you reach into the freezer and pull out a frozen dinner from the back.

Your stomach rumbles.

You open the box and pull out your steak and potatoes or lasagna or whatever and …

… Noooo!

Freezer burn.

Everything’s covered in a thick layer of stale-smelling ice crystals, and you know your dinner is ruined.

It’s a common thing. No matter how well it’s been packaged, any food left in the freezer too long is eventually going to end up as appealing as dead Tauntaun on Hoth.

Why, you ask?

Because the frozen water molecules in your steak, ice cream, or bag of corn want to find the coldest place they can, which typically isn’t inside

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