Boundaries Questions
Question 1: An example of setting boundaries that may hurt someone is…
When I first got married, my husband and I were struggling to save money to purchase a new family car and a home. We constructed a strict budget to meet our financial goals and began learning the trade of bargain shopping. In addition to our expenses, our son was diagnosed with severe food allergies, which required him to eat a special diet that is double the cost of regular food. During this time, my father, who was experiencing unfortunate circumstances pleaded with me on a regular basis to lend him cash. On one occasion, my dad asked to borrow $250.00 to send my sister on a school choir trip to Vermont, promising to pay it back. After discussing it with my husband, we decided to lend him the money so my sister would not miss the opportunity. A few months later, my stepmother called from Advanced Auto Parts asking me to give the clerk my credit card information over the
…show more content…
There were multiple situations such as these throughout the year; however, we finally drew the line when my dad requested money so their house would not be repossessed. I was angry and felt manipulated and disrespected by their total disregard for our financial issues as well. I needed to set boundaries to protect my family and to respect my husband.
Question 2: Setting boundaries is different from intentionally hurting a person’s feelings because…
Explaining to my father that I could no longer lend him money was difficult, but it was different from intentionally hurting his feelings, as I helped as much as possible. An old saying states that if you give a man a fish, you only feed him for a day. However, teaching a person to fish feeds them for life. Helping my dad was only hurting him as it was enabling him to continue avoiding his responsibilities as an
Growing up with a father who blamed me for the death of his wife which of course broke through any happiness, care or love he felt for me his own son. My house was always filled with dark gloomy colors and we never really had guests over at all. My father was a mystery most people but in his job he had power over people because they were frightened by his just by his presence. It was a very rare pleasure filled with fright when we spoke and I can only think of one time where I got a hint of positive feeling from him. It was a dark, rainy gloomy day and the house never held a promise for the future so I was constantly bored and decided to read some old books from my father’s dusty library. There I sat with a book in hand picking up any knowledge that I possibly could and he walked in and said to me “Montressor, you impress me with act of trying to do something useful”, I replied to him with the only thing I could ever say to him, yes sir. I can only remember the constant hate I would receive from him and it made me think that I would never please
A few months later my dad received a call saying that my Grandma was in the hospital. She had been forgetting to take her medicine and she had attacked my Grandpa. She did not hurt him though. I never thought that, it would ever happen. We went to visit her a couple weeks later. She was so embarrassed that she was in the hospital for that. Finally, after about a month, she came home happier than ever.
When I was young, my father’s friends sometimes give me money to use as an allowance. I always reject more than several times that they do not have to give me money, but in the end, they force me to accept the money. As a child, I feel happy about getting allowance, but I do not want to show that I am greedy person. Also, Korean adult think that when they meet a friend’s child, they should give money so child can use it as allowance. However, in the end the child’s parents should pay back the same amount to their friend’s child as give and take.
It all started when my dad put my name into the lottery without informing me. We’d discussed it the year prior, and I’d know that he was pretty intent on putting my name in, he just didn’t inform me when he actually put my in the lottery. I remember finding out that he put my name in a few months later. At first I wasn’t sure how I felt about it: A new school, new friends, the difficulty.
My family was dysfunctional due to the fact that my parents would argue about their responsibilities. This was especially relevant during dinner when I would sit at the table - told minutes before that dinner will be ready soon, but then would wait hours for any food to finally arrive, my parents busy doing work, would forget to cook and instead order dinner from a nearby restaurant.
The day before my fifth birthday, Mother became ill. Now I know that it was because we did not have enough food. I remember she always ate last. We went to the local hospital but we were turned away because Father said the sign read 'local residents only.'
My parents did not discuss their reasons for the divorce with me, they didn't have to, and I knew the reasons. I had lived the reasons for as long as I was old enough to remember. The arguments, the name calling, the accusations, the past threats to move out. I was well aware of the reasons. Although there was never any physical violence there was enough screa...
...esses with my source of income! My mom and Kirby resolved the situation and she was being as nice as possible, I no longer felt welcomed and soon found another job.
My mother was taking care of me, and my three other siblings all alone by herself. When my father was living my mother only had one job, but now she had to work more. She had a massive impact on our lives by making sure we had everything we needed. Because I was the oldest of my siblings, I felt like I was a parent. At just eight years old, I had to skip school just to make sure my siblings had someone to look after them while my mother worked. I was obligated to feed them, give them baths, and put clothes on them. It was very difficult, but I knew my mother had to pay bills, and take care of us and herself, so I knew she couldn’t afford a babysitter. When times got very tough, my mom would get stressed out and take it out on us by throwing tantrums, hollering at us and beating on us. I didn’t have a choice but to encourage my mother, and be the one to push her to not give
This amounted into years of heartache for me and my two sisters and I was left with trauma.
In life many of us experience what it is like to be hurt by those we hold dear. As a young girl I saw this first hand that generally the people we hold the closest actually end up being the people that hurt us the most. You expect more from them and their actions affect you on a deeper level the people you hold to a different standard from your loved ones. My grandmother taught me through the hardships she experienced what it mean to be a genuinely selfless person. My grandmother showed me the best way to live is by ensuring the happiness of loved ones even when they have wronged you
In my wallet, I store dire personal items such as my lisence and some pictures. Among other things, I have my money, like everybody else, and certificates for stores. This summer, I went to the Keys with my family. I drove down there with my wallet and took it everywhere with me, like I would any other time. Well, when someone doesn't have pockets, then it is hard to keep their wallet right next to them at all times. I was carrying my wallet out from the hotel, along with my keys, and set both on top of the car. When I figured out that I needed the keys in order to get in the car and turn it on, I took them off the top of the roof, leaving my wallet behind. I sat in the car, car door open, waiting for my dad to make it to the car so we could all go to a diving area. Once he made it to the car, without thinking, I closed the door and started the car. I had been driving about half a mile before I realized that my wallet was no longer on my body. Immediately, I pulled the car over, and the next hour or so was spent looking for my wallet. All I could think about was what I would lose if I didn't find my wallet. The week before was my birthday, and I was given $60 to Best Buy and $50 to Auto Zone. Aside from that I had $3 in cash. While walking up and down the road that my wallet flew off on, my sister found my two Best Buy cards.
According to National Geographic Society (2016), “a boundary is a real or imaginary line that separates two things. However, in geography, boundaries separate different regions of the Earth”. Also, a country or territory has different types of boundaries; they can be physical, cultural and political, among others. Physical boundary is a naturally occurring divide between two areas, this includes: rivers, mountain ranges, oceans, and deserts (Types of Boundaries: Physical & Cultural, n.d.). “A cultural boundary is a boundary line that runs along differences in ethnicity, such as language and religion” (Types of Boundaries: Physical & Cultural, n.d.). Lastly, as stated by National Geographic Society (2016) “Political boundaries are the dividing
When I was about five years old, my parents got a divorce. I lived with my mother from the age of 5 to about the age of 12. Throughout those 6 or 7 years, I shared a home with 5 sisters. Under the support and protection of my mother, we were hardly financially stable. We were required to live for days and even weeks without electricity. With my mother working overtime, we had to prepare our own meals with the little resources that we were able to obtain.
Asking my father for money or if he wanted to buy gum. My father would give them a dollar or buy few peices of gum. I notice my father face look unhappy and try hard to smile. I ask my mom " why does kids doing that?", my mother respond and explain to me that some families where very poor and the hole family would work to be able to survive, even if it ment to put there children to work. I can tell even my mother look sad. There was silent for a good while. My mother put on music to cheer up, that always