As the case may be, children are strongly affected by divorce. Some react differently than others, but all experience some kind of emotional change. Parents who are going through a divorce sometimes try to shield their children from the situation. But regardless of their parents good intentions, children often find themselves in an emotional catastrophe. Instead of protection from the situation, children need support and reassurance during this hard time.
In a divorce, the parents usually do not get along and may have different opinions on items. They may go to court and fight against each other about what factors caused the separation leading to the divorce and how the properties are divided. This possible exposure is very unhealthy for a child. The child sees his parents fighting and may learn from the behavior and display it. He or she may see that behavior as being an acceptable action.
The divorce of parents affects the life of the child. One of the biggest issues of divorce is who the child lives with after the divorce. The separation can impact the child’s sense of security and stability. The two people upon whom the child depended on are no longer as available as they used to be. It can send the child back and forth between the two parents over various distances, leaving the child feeling confused or lost.
Throughout time, people from all over the world have chosen to live together, or “get married”. Marriage is a beautiful thing, but there are some couples who are unable to maintain their relationship, because they choose divorce as a solution to cope with the problems between husband and wife. For a child, it is very difficult to live only with one of his or her parents. Children cannot adjust well during divorce of parents because the change is devastating for them. Although divorce can be solution to cope with problem between the husband and wife, it still has dangerous effects especially on children.
Now people get married knowing that if the relationship as a married couple does not work there are chances of requesting a divorce. More of the divorce cases occur because couples are falling apart due to many different reasons, for example; conflict on their marriage, loss of romantic feelings, a spouse committing an affair or some kind of marriage problem. Some of the divorcing couples have children of young age. The children do not have an idea on how to deal with a terrible event like the “Divorce.” Some of the children will have to learn to deal with the divorce at a young age and this dramatic change may cause the child to develop some kind of mental and attitude problems. Parents do not realize in how hard it is for a child to deal with a divorce from their parents.
Children and teens are not mentally prepared to withstand a divorce between the two people they think can get through anything. It is not fair for someone so innocent to have their world completely flipped upside down and their life changed forever. Divorce can change not only the child’s life, but also the way they talk, think, and behave. Focus on the Family points to a decline and a regression in a child’s behavior which includes drug use, crime, and sexual behavior because of divorce. Grades tend to drop and the likeliness of graduation is diminished.
There are many issues and concerns that divorced parents must think about when children are involved. Divorce affects children in many ways such as emotionally, physically, academically, and socially. Although there may be some advantages to divorce, for example divorce is good if the child is being hurt or abused, by one of the parents. The reality is that divorce is bad for many children because it can make the children depressed, and because they have to choose which parent to stay with. Parents should stay in marriage instead of divorce for the sake of the children.
The relationship between the child and the parent take a huge impact. Children in divorced families receive less emotional support, financial assistance, and practical help from their parents. Divorce, makes it harder for a child to trust their parents. Therapist Steven Earll states “For a child, divorce shatters this basic safety and belief concerning the parents’ ability to care for them and to make decisions that truly consider their well-being.” During the first year following the divorce, mothers tend to become less affectionate with their children. They often lack the communication that they once had with their child.
The people often overlooked throughout the process of a divorce, surprisingly enough, are the children. Children found in the middle of a divorce are very susceptible to developing trust issues, social problems, and often struggle academically. Successful relationships start with a foundation of trust and respect for one another. Being able to maintain trust in relationships is often a challenge for children coming from divorced parents, to a higher extent if the children observed an issue of trust disrupt their own parents’ marriage. Moreover, if a child becomes aware of an affair happening in their parents’ marriage, such child is very likely to carry a great resentment toward one parent and a much stronger bond with the other.