Essay On Social Penetration Theory

1536 Words4 Pages

In this paper I will analyze my own behavior, behaviors of others, and interactions I have noticed pertaining to social penetration theory. Social penetration theory provided me with insight on my daily communication practices. It brings light to the reasons as to why we feel comfortable, and uncomfortable in our ongoing experiences.
Social penetration theory states, in order to develop stronger relationships, each party must engage into information disclosure. And the strength of a relationship runs parallel with the type of information we decide to share. People are like onions. They have layers, and these layers are referred to as public which is available to all, semi-private which is available to some, and private which is rarely available …show more content…

The buildup and the possible breakdown, which is known as social depenetration, is explained. My past relationships have begun and ended in this way. I will use my last relationship as an example because it is the most fresh in my mind. It started off with shallow superficial things. There was physical attraction, I like the way she looked and carried herself. I enjoyed the same hobbies as well as the movies she watched. Then we eventually started disclosing more personal information. We had deeper talks such as life goals. I feel that these are the “honeymoon” stages, when it’s all about fun. Things started to get serious, and she implied that we live together. At first I was a little hesitant, because I was afraid that there were things about me that may ruin the smooth relationship we were having. As the theory insists, this feelings of discomfort stemmed from the “Self-Concept” factor. I was worried that the way I lived was not up to her expectations. One example would be my level of organization. In comparison to my Jitchan, I am not the tidiest person. She was, in my opinion, a high maintenance girl, but after living with her for a month, I could see that the way she presented herself in public didn’t correlate with the tidiness of her home. I had mix feeling on that one, I was glad that my tidiness was not a problem, although her untidiness signaled possible future …show more content…

This phenomenon is triggered by trust issues. This began with an argument of me hanging out with my friends drinking, as well as her use of social media. I went out and had two drinks more than I said I will. We got into a phone argument and the next day her Instagram feed was filled with subliminal messages that were directed to me. On top of that she was “single.” I shared with her some of my past drinking experiences. So I understood why she’d be uptight about me going out and drinking. But going on social media as “single” in one night, on our first argument stunned me. She lost trust in me because I drank two more than I said. I lost trust in her because she claimed single in a heartbeat. The worst part is I had to find out a couple days later from someone else, because I didn’t have an Instagram. Interestingly, relational disintegration and relational renegotiation took place so quick that I couldn’t distinguish the starting and ending point of each. Long story short, after a few months of smooth sailing, the Instagram gimmick happened again. So there was another case of relational renegotiation. I suggested that we should be friends because we were both unhappy most of the time. For her it was all or nothing. We were either in an intimate relationship, or enemies. After a year later, she came around and we to this day we are civil. I explained to

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