The Concept Of Friendship

Friendship is like an onion, there are many layers to the ideas and concepts that are associated with the notion of friendship. The idea of friendship and the complexities accompanying this type of relationship could scare someone off. To quote the song, Waving Through a Window from the 2017 musical, Dear Evan Hansen. “I’ve learned to slam on the brake. Before I even turn the key. Before I lead with the worst of me. Give them no reason to stare. No slipping up if you slip away. So, I've got nothing to share. No, I got nothing to say”. (Pasek & Paul, 2017). These lyrics from the recent Tony winner for Best Musical highlight that some people when faced with the notion of entering the swimming pool that makes up friendship, there are some
The third chapter in The Meaning of Friendship showed that many older minds had rather disparaging regarding the concept of friending online such as psychologist, David Holmes puts it. “…Estimated that up to 40 per cent of the information displayed on social networking sites might be fabricated”. (Vernon, 2010) I do concede that there can be problematic aspects to befriending someone online as they could be wearing a mask and pretending that they are someone that is not truthful to who they are but I also believe there are benefits to the idea of an online friendship. Cherie Burbach in her article, 3 Ways Having Friends Online Makes Your Life Better argues that we can use these online friendships to strengthen the trust that we have with our friends that we interact with offline. “People tend to share things with their online friends that may be embarrassing to admit to those they know in real life. But part of building a great friendship is being real with people, so if you're purposely hiding from your offline friends, take a cue from your online pals and slowly share the details of your life with the people you know (Burbach, n.d.) Burbach argues the point that I think many people that have negative outlooks on internet friendships tend to dismiss the very idea that online friendships can lead to people
“The friendships between men are often more problematic. Men are acculturated to be less affectionate towards one another, especially in public, as, historically, such behavior has been viewed as less masculine”. (Olsech-Forrester, n.d.) This is a rather unhealthy mindset that we have thankfully been moving away from as we are starting to realize that men shouldn’t keep their emotions bottled up and be allowed the same opportunities to share heartfelt moments as those of the opposite sex. This is something that Harris O’Malley in his article, The Surprising Need for Male Intimacy addresses. O’Malley argues that part of the problem that men have is “By trying to foster a more intimate bond with somebody, you’re tacitly making yourself vulnerable and admitting to weaknesses, which is part of how men lose status amongst other men”. (O'Malley, 2014) He also ties this into the idea of the inane man-cred and the man-code, and asserts that for benefit of men, they need to move away from these stereotypes and allow men to embrace intimate relationships that mean more than just getting together for a drink. In the same article, O’Malley raises the interesting point that men, when looking for a more intimate relationship are discouraged from doing it and society has a hard problem allowing men to get that.