Because I Love You…
“Because I love you… you shouldn’t be talking to that dude you should know how dumb that makes me look, because I love you… I should smash your phone… because I love you.” In today’s society, teen dating violence is a big dilemma, not only is it with girls, but it ranges within the boys also. The effects of teen dating violence vary across sexes. Girls are more likely to experience long term mental and behavioral problems like suicidal attempts, depression and substance abuse than boys. For example, there is always domestic violence when it comes to hitting girls over jealousy or trust(“teen dating violence is a significant problem,”) but in other cases the abuser is not always the man, it can also be a woman, Domestic
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People or even close friends do not like to get involved in other people’s problems. For one, the person who may be a witness to this abuse, they don’t want to help because most of the time they think something horrible may happen to them for trying to help. Abuse like this does not start the day you meet your partner. It can start a week, a month, or maybe even a year from now, there is no set of time span for when you partner will be abusive when he or she will be loving. There’s just so many ways the abuse can start, for one it can be physically abusing the partner by striking, lashing out, and or smacking, and there may be sexual abuse, or even emotional or verbal abuse. There’s no telling which could be first. How would someone know if there’s some sort of abuse going on? Well there are many signs that a person is in an abusive relationship. The abuser wants as much control over the victim as possible; the abuser usually needs to be attached to the victim and the victim cannot or may not do anything without the abuser. For one just the way the abuser speaks to victim, by telling him/her what to do, you may see a tight arm grabbing, or a vicious look when told to do something, there’s always going to be a specific way to tell it may not be when they first see them, but eventually they’ll tell something wrong is going
“Domestic violence, or intimate partner violence, is defined as a pattern of assaultive and coercive behaviors, including physical, sexual, and psychological attacks as well as economic coercion that adults or adolescents use against their intimate partners” (Peeks-Asa). When it comes to domestic violence many people don’t want to get involved, but if just one person took a stand maybe others would follow and potentially save a life, like the neighbors did in The Day It Happened by Rosario Morales. Domestic violence can happen to anyone at any time, there is no typical victim or perpetrator. The fact that there is no one specific group that domestic violence occurs in more than another, only makes it more difficult to get an accurate representation of just who is being affected by this crime. “Domestic violence and abuse does not discriminate” (Smith and Segal). Domestic violence can have specific victims such as a spouse or domestic partner, a child, or an elder. Domestic violence can affect men as well as women. Some types of domestic violence are physical, verbal or nonverbal, sexual, stalking or cyberstalking, economic or financial, and spiritual.
Gender-based violence has been recognized as a large public health problem as well as a violation of human rights worldwide. One out of three women has been beaten, coerced into sex, or abused in another way at least once in her life (www.infoforhealth.org). The abuser is usually a member of the family, introducing the difficult problem in that the abuse usually happens behind closed doors, and is often viewed by cultural norms and legal systems as a family matter rather than a crime.
Domestic violence can affect anyone. Domestic violence is a pattern of behavior used to establish power and control over another through emotional attack, fear, and intimidation. Domestic violence or battering, often, includes the threat or use of violence; this violence is a crime. Battering occurs when one person believes he/she is entitled to control another. Domestic violence affects people in all social, economic, racial, religious, and ethnic groups; whether the couple is married, divorced, living together, or still dating. Another reality is that abusers and their victims can be gay, strait, young, or old. Violence develops from verbal, physical, emotional, financial, and sexual abuse. Most domestic violence victims are women by men, but that doesn’t suggest that others cannot be battered or are perpetrators of abuse -- such as women on men, or same sex abuse. Battering or domestic violence, is now mutual and it is not a ‘couple’s quarrel’. Disagreements arise occasionally in all relationships, but battering involves every aspect of a relationship. While physical violence is the “enforcer” or the criminal act, other behaviors erode the partner or victim’s sense of self, self-determination, and free will; this is ultimately lethal for many women.
Chapter 8 entitled, Intimate Partner Abuse, outlines and dwells on the victims in abusive relationships. Intimate partner abuse is when an individual in a relationship purposely hurts another person physically and or as well as emotionally. IPA and domestic violence correlates because the abuse usually comes from a current or past lover. The factors that can contribute to intimate partner abuse is the individual, relationship, community and societal. There are two forms of violence throughout IPA which is yelling and throwing objects and the more intense form would be striking and hitting.
The headline, “Recession Causes Increase in Teen Dating Violence”, clearly affirms a causal relationship between the economic recession, and the increase in teen relationship violence. Specifically, causation can be described as one event causing an effect within a specific scenario. As you see in the headline title, a recession assumes the responsibility for an increase in teen date violence. Hence, with this headline we observe a cause and effect relationship.
Many people are uneducated when it comes to domestic violence, sexual violence, and teen dating violence. “Domestic violence is a pattern of behavior used to establish power and control over another person through fear and intimidation, often including the threat or use of violence” (Domestic Violence: Statistics & Facts). The statistics of domestic violence are alarming. “1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence during her lifetime”
Other people often overlook domestic abuse. People generally do not like to get themselves involved in other people’s problems, especially when they believe there might be problems at home. For one reason or the other, the person who is the witness to someone who is being abused by their spouse does not want to report the crime, or get involved at all, because they are afraid something violent will happen to them for trying to help. Inside the relationship, there are many signs of the abuse. The biggest sign is that you completely fear your partner. Domestic abuse does not start the day that you meet your partner. It can start a week, month, or even years after.
Abuse may not outwardly begin as a physical action against the victim. “Approximately two-thirds of Americans say it is hard to determine whether someone has been a victim of domestic abuse” (Break The Cycle). The abuser typically starts by attacking the victim mentally and emotionally. Beginning signs that one could be in an abusive relationship is if the suspected abuser shows signs of possessiveness, extreme jealousy, or insecurity over the relationship. More expressive signs of violent behavior would be an explosive temper, unpredictable mood swings, or constantly putting down his/her partner (Break The Cycle). By expressing these characteristics, an abuser will begin to isolate the victim from his/her family and friends. Once he or she has managed to create an attachment between the victim and themselves, the physical violence might begin to take place. After an attack, oftentimes the abuser will excessively apologize to the victim in an attempt to earn back their trust. Victims are often embarrasse...
This article explains the fear that runs through abused women’s head. Signs within the victim to look for in an abusive relationship is feeling threatened, criticized, controlled, afraid, or shy from the spouse. Physical signs to look for is the abuser hitting, twisting words around, insulting, or purposely putting the victim in danger (Rafenstein
But we don 't really know why men choose to be violent towards women. A study of the mothers of child abuse victims shows that battering is the most common context for child abuse, that the battering male is the typical child abuser. Feminist theory in domestic violence emphasizes gender and power inequality in opposite-sex relationships. Feminist theory also has to do with gender equalities and how men still believe that they are the superior sex.
Psychological Consequences of Dating Violence on Women The psychological consequences of dating violence towards women have widely studied, but research investigations continue, in part because of the increase in rates of violence against all women. Dating Violence is defined as "the use of or threat of physical force or restraint carried out with the intent of causing pain or injury to another" with a dating relationship" (Christine & Kerrie, 2007). It is also defined as a form of behavior pattern in romantic relationships between dating partners. This paper will focus on the psychological consequences of dating violence and how this can be handled at an early stage before it gets worse.
Sexuality Today Newsletter "Violence in Adolescent Dating Relationships Common, New Survey Reveals" December 22, 1986 (reporting on a report in Social Work contact Karen Brockopp) pp 2-3.
The popular press article I chose is titled How to Spot an Abuser Before It’s too late by Laura Riley. Laura Riley gives nines warning signs towards if a person is in a relationship with an abusive person. In her years of research she has found that most abusers do not use words to deal with problems. They tend to lash out by hitting someone or something. She explains this as infantile behavior. Another sign she gives is if a person is very possessive. This is how abusers obtain control of their partner by pushing them away from friends and family and normal everyday activities. Another sign is jealousy. Abusers tend to be very insecure so they get overly jealous when their partner talks to the opposite sex. She also has analyzed that if your partner reiterates that you’re the only one for them. The abuser has you on a very high pedestal, so once you disappoint them it gives them all the more reason for them to lash out on you. Another sign is if th...
What starts as a loving relationship can soon develop into an abusive one. Although the symptoms may seem small it’s important to be aware of them.
There are many different forms of abuse and many people do not realize. Verbal abuse is the use of words to attack, hurt or injure someone, or to gain power and control over them, or to persuade someone to believe something that is untrue and harmful. Abuse does not just occur with men to women, though this paper is going to focus on it. Abuse is about control and the fear of losing it. The abuser may fear not being “good enough” and or meeting others expectations. He/she may attempt to make their victim feel and believe similar things about him/her self. Abusers exploit, lie, insult, demean, ignore (the "silent treatment"), manipulate, and control. There are a million ways to abuse, directly and indirectly.