Decoding the Intricacies of Story Titles

One of the hardest things about writing a story, in my opinion, is finding a title that is intriguing and fits the plot well. That being said, I really like what you titled your story. “Just a White Boy” draws in the reader with the question of why is he just a white boy? Who is the white boy? What has he done to be described as such? Furthermore, it provides a sense that race will definitely have something to do with the story without spoiling plot points or giving away critical information, which are all attributes of a great title. In the same vein of what is working, your descriptions and imagery are vivid and provide rich detail to the overarching narrative. For example, in the second paragraph on page four where you reference the “static

I would, however, enjoy seeing more of Tom’s life and perspective. The story, while being narrated from Tom’s point of view, does not say a lot about him or help his character progress. This is not saying that I do not like the attention given to detailing Kenyon. I love the way Tom talks about him. Within Tom’s description of his best friend, Kenyon emerges as a tangible character that is believable and as someone that the reader wants to root for. There is nothing wrong with Tom not being as smart, respectful, religious, and etcetera as Kenny, but I would love to learn more about his character and motives. For example, why did Tom call Kenyon the N word so many years ago? It could also be interesting to hear Kenyon’s opinion on who Tom is: I doubt someone as near-perfect as Kenny would be friends with someone who is just a “dick,” as Tom describes himself on page

The only area that does not flow as smoothly as the others, is the ending scene where Tom gives his opinion on gun control. His answer illustrates his privilege as a white person in the United States. He will not have to actively worry about police brutality because of his race. I liked how this concept could be tactfully inferred. When it came to Keyon’s response, however, I felt his monologue was a bit blocky. This could easily be fixed by breaking up the quotes and providing imagery to describe how Tom’s belief made him feel. Moreover, I was drawn out a bit from the world you crafted when Kenny mentioned that his father, who was a cop working in the inner city, never carried a gun. I began immediately questioning if that was a real possibility open to police officers. I have never seen cops who are on duty without a handgun. This disconnect, however, can easily be remedied by having Kenyon say that despite the fact that his father was a police officer and was required to carry a gun while on duty, he never once pulled his gun out at an individual regardless of how bad the situation became. By making this slight change, the reader is not brought out of the story and his father’s virtuous character is still maintained. Overall, I really enjoyed reading your story. Police brutality and gun control are topics that are easy to get very passionate about, but you dealt with these highly sensitive issues in a