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Divorce and its effects on children
Divorce and its effects on children
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Good day everyone and thanks for dropping by! I am Shaz and I'm just a regular person like you in my mid-thirties who has been married for 4 years now. I bet the first question on your mind is if I'm happy in my marriage or not, right? Well read on to find out! Four years of marriage is not a long time, but during this brief period I have had several moments to cherish, a few low points and plenty of memorable experiences. No doubt it has been a roller-coaster ride so far so I guess I've had a pretty good ride huh? Truth be told, I have been through it all in my quest to reach the blessed state of wedded nirvana. I've read self-help books, listened to podcasts, browsed through countless websites and asked people for advice - I've been there
Remember that if you ever put your marital problems on the back burner they are sure to boil over. Unkown "Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up. " Joseph Barth "A happy marriage is still the greatest treasure within the gift of fortune. " Eden Phillpotts "Happy marriages begin when we marry the one we love, and they blossom when we love the one we married.
MD was conceived with the intention of working with couples experiencing marital issues and want to work towards marital renewal, a greater level of intimacy and commitment to the marriage. Yet, couples who are on the verge of divorce may also participate, using this as a “last-ditch” attempt to save their marriage. Due to the range in severity of marital problems faced, discrepancies may arise when dealing with the couples. The result is a group purpose that is no longer clear cut and has become diluted so as to encompass the distinct goals of all members. It is essential for the workers of MD to evaluate and re-establish a clear purpose ...
Daw, Jennifer. “Saving Marriages: How to do it?” American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. 16 June 2005. 16 June 2005
into the person of your dreams. A few weeks pass and you find yourself falling in love. Sooner than later, you decide that this is the one. So, you get married, you have children, you are happy and everything seems to be sailing along great. Although your marriage has its difficulties, you work through them and work toward a happy ending. All your children are well behaved and smart with promising futures. Then, all of a sudden, the “spark” extinguishes and your once perfect, happy home feels like a war zone. You and your spouse are continually disagreeing and fighting about insignificant things. The children are bewildered and sit back watching with despair.
While romantic love can sometimes seems frivilous yet exciting, the love found in today's marriages can be just the opposite. It sometimes falls into a routine. A spouse can get caught up in the duties within their marriage and forget that true love should also be invigorating. The everyday habits, like working, cooking, cleaning, bills, can become tiresome, drawing attention away from the love found in marriage, leaving one under the impression that the problem is within the marriage, not themselves. It is easy to forget that love is a two-way street.
He whispered to himself, “Come on Burt you can do this! Just be like all the other men and you will do just fine.” However, Burt was wrong, he was not like the other gentlemen. He had not talked to a person of the opposite gender in what seemed like years.
“Amarithari,” Laidrian called out, footsteps pounding against the rough floors as he jogged to my side. “Skipping out on sparring for the day?” I glanced over my shoulder, the door to the barracks falling close with a loud thud behind us, before I shrugged. Laidrian rose a brow, sweat clinging to his forehead as he cocked his head to the side. “The elf is coming tomorrow,” I replied briskly.
“-Is your biggest adversary, I know,” I cut her off and brushed my hands down the front of my dress. I refused to let Izzy retrogress back into the unhappy girl she was just minutes ago. I also had given up on trying to redress the injury Gertrude left on Izzy all those unforgotten years ago. “But what you fail to realize is that sometimes you tend to augment the situation.” “Augment?”
Jacob awoke in high spirits. He turned to give his bride a kiss and is horrified by what he sees. “Dear God, what have I done?” Grappling with his thoughts he tried to remember everything about last night. It was dark when he came to Rachel to consummate their marriage; his mind fogged from partying and drinking wine.
In the book, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work (1999) John M. Gottman provides insight on the seven fundamental tools to construct positive relationships. Through long years of research, Gottman studied married couples and noted degenerative behaviors that hindered the formation and attainment of a long and healthy marriage. Gottman research focused on several key behavioral predictors of divorce, which he calls the “The Four Horsemen”; Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling.
It is sad to know that my dreams of becoming a wife have vanished like snow on a hot summer day. A lot happened after our first-year anniversary. We would fight and make up until fighting wasn't worth it, and making up had come to the point of hurry up. I knew I wasn't giving my husband the attention he needed, and he would find it elsewhere. As a result, I remember the times he would leave me in bed to sleep or go over to my mother's house and leave me alone.
Before I finish, I would like to offer my own advice for a happy and successful marriage, now just because I’m not married or never have been it doesn’t mean to say I am now not an expert on it.
Marriage is easy in good times, but not leaving or withdrawing when the chips are down whether the change is financial, emotional, health related, interpersonal, family, spiritual or psychological, is the very reason we maintain a caring place beside each other for the duration of any crisis or challenging time. Our foundation is that have each other’s backs and are there for each other through the good, bad and ugly times of life. It is agreed between us that more often than not, when we face challenging times, it is often caused by outside influences and it’s not between us and is what has created our bond. We function as a team and lean on each other’s strengths and support each other during tough times. Asking each other for help when we need it is key and not considered weakness.
Keeeping naughty kids busy and occupied is a big challenge. More so, when it is wedding time. How many of you would want lil champs messing up the room where the bride is to dress up for the most important day of her life? Or for that matter, the mischievious lot going and spoiling giveaways to be given to guests from the boy’s side with their muddy and soiled little fingers. Ouch!
...ilitary, we really dated from a distance and did not spend the quality time to get to learn about each other. We both were young and there is no handbook to guide you through every situation you will encounter. I can safely state that infidelity has no place in the life of a married couple. A committed relationship should be what it is, a commitment of respect. Respect is showing love, when you love someone you protect them from hurt. It gives comfort to the heart to be with someone who respects you. I gained confidence through being faithful to my marriage and putting my focus on one family. A husband and wife should build each up not tear each other down. I have come to believe and stand by the word of God in my marriage and not a day goes by that I do not appreciate my children and especially my wife for treating me as a man I have grown to be.