I was cognizant of nothing of this nature in my early years. I was not aware that not having a Dad in my life was different than most and that it would so heavily and thoroughly change who I was as a person. I was only aware that my Mom and I lived in a house by ourselves with our two dogs. That was our “normal”. She and I went everywhere together. We ate dinner together, went to school together, watched television together and cooked together. Being as little and naive as I was, I saw nothing wrong with this. As I grew older, I felt my life deviate from the way that everyone else’s was going. Not necessarily in a bad way; it was just different. From when I was was a baby, to when I was four, to when I was twelve, the position I was in was not an issue for me. Only having a Mom did not raise a question when I was …show more content…
Within those years I became undoubtedly more aware of my situation but it still did not bother me. I began to attempt to ask questions, seeking some kind of answer. Most of these questions went without reply. When I was finally given answers, they were not well explained and had insufficient detail. All that I was told was that my Mom had me when she was twenty. Her and my Dad went to Trinity High School together, although I do not know if they were in the same grade or not. At some point they got married; I honestly have no idea when, but I know this to be true because my Mom’s last name changed. Then, at some point, they got divorced. I believe that my Dad was around, on and off, until I was four. At that point, he gave full custody to my Mom and left for good. Those few pieces of information collectively were all I knew and all I still know, about my Dad. The endeavor I went on just to get that information out of my family made it clear that that was
I never knew my father. I knew of him course, but whenever I asked my mom about it, the story was condensed to something along the lines of
Throughout Exploring the Role of Father Involvement in the Relationship Between Day Care and Children’s Behavior the main focus is on social and developmental psychologies. The social psychology is examined by the behavior and responses of the children, while developmental psychology was examined by behavior after so much time with parents. The researchers were questioning weather or not the amount time a child spent with their father was related to their misbehavior in a school setting. The study they conducted gave mixed results in which left it possible that these behavioral problems could be blamed on the father and his involvement in the child’s life.
Since my mother had been my primary caregiver up until the age of 14, I had already been influenced by the constructed gender-roles within society.
Now that I am in the counseling program I have become aware of the dysfunctional family that I have grew up in. Growing up I remember my father was never around. There is a memory I will never forget it seems blurry but I remember my parents arguing and becoming angry. I went into a room and when I came out I saw my father’s hand bleeding. My mother was holding a kitchen knife and she had cut his hand. Since my father was hardly around we never had family trips or family time together. He would spend his weekends drinking or going out with his friends. I have another memory that stands out. I remember I was in the back seat of the car and my mom was dropping of my dad somewhere. They were arguing the whole way over there, once we got to the destination my dad got off and walked out. I can imagine this affected my mother as a woman because her needs were not being
When I was born, my mother breast fed me for two weeks, I stayed in the hospital room with her instead of going to the nursery, and she was home with me for the first five years of my life. My father worked and my mother tended to the home, with the help of her mother and grandmother. I ate Gerber baby jarred food and my mother read to me every night. My family did not adhere to many other cultural norms however. It was culturally expected that a husband and wife would have a home, with stable jobs and an established relationship before having children. My father was eight years my mother’s senior, and my mother was only 18 when I was born. My mother never earned her high school diploma. My parents were married the month before I was born. My father worked in construction and had a criminal record. Every single one of these descriptions violates the cultural norms of where I grew up in North Carolina. Although my story starts to sound a lot like a Lifetime movie, my mother defied all odds to provide a safe and secure haven for me. “When they sense that a parent is consistent and dependable, they develop a sense of basic trust in the parent” (Crain, 283). I could rely on my parents and trust that they would be there to take care of me which lead to my development of “the core ego strength of this period: hope” which emerges from the child developing a favorable balance of trust over mistrust. “Hope is the expectation that despite frustrations, rages, and disappointments, good things will happen in the future” (Crain, 285). My mother is the living embodiment of that sentiment. As early as I can remember, I can remember her insistence that as long as we were together, we were
I was fourteen years old when my life suddenly took a turn for the worse and I felt that everything I worked so hard for unexpectedly vanished. I had to become an adult at the tender age of fourteen. My mother divorced my biological father when I was two years old, so I never had a father. A young child growing up without a father is tough. I often was confused and wondered why I had to bring my grandfather to the father/daughter dance. There was an occurrence of immoral behavior that happened in my household. These depraved occurrences were often neglected. The first incident was at the beach, then my little sisters’ birthday party, and all the other times were overlooked.
When parents discover that their child will consider different the ideology of perfection is replaced with fear of the unknown. Parents may experience their own form of grief, Howard, Williams, Port, & Lepper (1997), made the suggestion
Ever since I was a little girl I always wanted my life to be like the ones in movies, but sadly it was not. Having one parent wasn't easy, but my dad did his best to be a great father. My parents separated when I was 7 years old and that was when my childhood changed. Growing up with no mother was difficult, in fact, I felt left out when I would be around my friends because they had both of their parents and did family things together and I didn't. It was very depressing for me because I felt like I was different from everyone else. I also felt like I couldn't do anything or go far with my future goals because I didn't get much support like others did. I never found it easy, but I’m glad I had a father that stood by my side through thick and
This normalcy can be negative or positive and is normally hindered by the presence of supportive and engaging parents first and foremost. Children learn from their surroundings because it is what they grow accustomed to. Children do not know anything else other than what they were taught and trained to know as being normal in their lives and this is where they gain their worldview of what to perceive. That is why it is important to have a father present in the household because it vital to a child’s development. Studies show that if a child 's father is affectionate, supportive, and involved, he can contribute greatly to the child 's cognitive, language, and social development, as well as academic achievement, a strong inner core resource, sense of well-being, good self-esteem, and authenticity (Gross 2014). Therefore, having a father in the home is beneficial to the child’s development and wellbeing. However, there are some fathers who are in the child’s life, but really they are not present for the child. An absent father can mean different things like being physically there, but not actually being involved in the care of the child. It can also mean that the father is not being present for the child when they know that they are the child’s father. It can also be the result a father’s death,
When someone thinks about the definition of a father, he or she thinks about the support, care, love, and knowledge a father gives to his offspring. Most people automatically believe that biological fathers, along with the mothers, raise their children. However, that is not always the case. There are many children across the world who are raised without their father. These children lack a father figure. People do not realize how detrimental the lack of a father figure can be to the child, both mentally and emotionally. Enrolling boys between the ages of 5 to 16 without father figures in programs, such as Big Brothers Big Sisters, that involve building a relationship with someone who can serve as a role model is essential to prevent males from depression, difficulty in expressing emotions, and other consequences of having an absent father figure.
The role of a father in his child’s life extends past the knowledge of far too many, and can oftentimes be eclipsed by the role of the mother. Although the mother’s role is essential and greatly valued in a child’s life and development, the father plays a significant role as well. No mother can fill the father’s place in a child’s heart, for fathers nurture and play differently than a mother. Several studies show that an attendant and highly involved father is critical, especially in the early stages of a child’s life. The absence of a father during this stage can lead to “impaired social and behavioral abilities in adults” (Robert, 2013). But what is the role of the father? This paper discusses the role of the expectant father, the birth experience for him, the transition into fatherhood, and the rise of single fathers.
A major problem in our society today is the absence of fathers in the home and in the lives of their children. I believe that growing up in a two parent household gives a child the best chance to be successful. My theory is that the absence of a father greatly affects the outcome of the child’s life and limits their opportunity for success. For the sake of this argument success will be measured by education level, mental state and crime. I will explore what effects, if any, the absence of a father has on these factors of success.
It started when I was a little girl, I think I was about five years old. I grew up in a one parent household, with just my mom. I had three other siblings, two brothers and a sister. My mom was the sole provider of the family. Everything started getting hard for her as we grew. I got curious and asked my mom a question I never asked before. "Mom where is my dad and why isn 't he here to help you take care of us." " Mom said, he was killed when you were a baby." So I never spoke of it again until I had turned about fifteen years of age. I still was curious about what had happened to my father. I started having dreams of my father being around, a man whom i had never seen or meet before. He was just an illusion that I had made up inside my
A father have a big impact of their child life because its nothing like having a father to get that man part of your life. Although some believe that fathers do not play an important role, Fathers are vital in their children’s lives. Some people believe fathers don’t play major role.
My father and mother both cook and clean, my father works on the vehicles and fixes broken products in my house. The roles are mostly shared and both of my parents help around the house. My parents both support my sister and I and they both go to work as well as take care of us. The family theme I choose has impacted me by showing me all the different family types and how inequality is evident in any other type of family other then neutral or extended family. I now realize that I am very fortunate and everyone should accept others no matter what kind of family they live in. This has given me the label of normal in society if I had same sex parent I may be looked at as an outcast or outsider. Since this is how I was raised I am alike to many people. Since both of my parents work and went to post secondary education, I have been able to participate in post secondary school. My family impacts my everyday interactions because I base my actions on what they have taught me. I have learned what is right and wrong from my parents and I continue to apply that knowledge everyday. I respect my parent’s rules and even living in university I still think about them when making everyday decisions and ask myself if they would approve of my actions.