The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir
In the chapter of her book The Second Sex entitled “the Woman in Love,” Simone de Beauvoir characterizes the romantic ideal of the relationship with a man as a woman’s purpose as a form of self-deception (translated here as “bad faith”). The self-deception de Beauvoir describes is based in the thesis of The Second Sex. This is the idea that women have been deceived into believing that they are second-class humans. Western culture, according to de Beauvoir, teaches us that women are missing some elusive element of the self that endows men with freedom- a concept essential to the existentialist definition of the conscious being. Therefore, a woman can never find fulfillment as a thinking person as long as she believes that men are free beings and women their dependents. This state of affairs is reinforced through an all-encompassing system of thought that posits man as subject and woman as object, “doomed to dependency.” (In this chapter, de Beauvoir writes about the “modern woman” whose consciousness of her self has not yet matured. Therefore, when “woman” is referred to here, this is merely shorthand for the self-deceiving woman. The independent woman is another matter entirely.)
De Beauvoir postulates that the reason why women’s idea of love is so much more intense than men’s is because the woman, unable to become a whole person in and of herself, thinks that by attaching herself to a man she can transcend her position in life. She can move from object to subject through osmosis- the ultimate expression of “being for the other.” She can claim a share of his activities and his accomplishments in the public realm which she is prohibited to enter. Giving herself wholly to the man ...
... middle of paper ...
...that many women cling to even after they give up hope that “he” will ever come.
Is there a solution to this paradox, this Catch-22 that de Beauvoir describes? Yes, she says, but only when certain conditions are met. First, a woman must have a solid sense of herself as an existentialist “free being” before she goes looking for love. Second, the love relationship must be a freely chosen association of equals committed to respecting each other’s freedom. As de Beauvoir writes on p.667:
“Genuine love ought to be founded on the mutual recognition of two liberties; the lovers would then experience themselves both as self and as other; neither would give up transcendence, neither would be mutilated; together they would manifest values and aims in the world. For the one and the other, love would be revelation of self by the gift of self and enrichment of the world.”
Cosi fan Tutte shows that anyone can be deceived or be the deceiver, can love for real, for fake, and desire pride or lust, and fall into a crisis. It is interesting (and certainly amusing) how all of these five words connect with each other. Was love between the two men and two women genuine? Who was the deceiver and deceived? Was it because of the men’s failure to trust, or women’s failure to resist desire? Is there always such a crisis in a relationship? All these questions make one wonder. One thing for sure is that there is a positive and a negative side to these words. Gender does not matter, in the four characters’ situation, both perspectives of the words applied. The five words have shown me that there is a double meaning, or a duality in
He attempts to convert A into an ethicist by using conjugal, or companionate love, as an example of how leading an ethical life does not mean surrendering all enjoyment and pleasure. Marriage falls under the umbrella of conjugal love. In “The Aesthetic Validity of Marriage,” Wilhelm offers an enlightening comparison of romantic love (in the aesthetic form) and conjugal love, arguing that the aestheticism of romance is not lost with long-term companionship or marriage and the challenges and responsibilities that come with it. Rather, marriage speaks to a higher form of aestheticism because it includes both love and sensuality — not just fickle lust (Kierkegaard). Those, like Johaness, who view long-term love with cynicism either marry for convenience or end up alone because they are blind to the possibility of anything
...tion of both methods can be used to show France’s idea of what love is. Patrick John Ireland argued that France’s idea of love “is a human force controlled by man with great difficulty; it is a spontaneous, natural, and all-consuming power, the experience of which leads to an almost blind passion at times” (133). To be in love, one must be entirely devoted and passionate to one another to the point of blind passion. This is so for Yonec (the Princess jumps out of the tower) and Lanval (Lanval’s complete rejection of the human world until he is brought into the world of his lover). Not only does France portray love as natural and all-consuming, but also shows the private and unearthly nature of love that cannot be contained to the realm of the human world. Rather, love transcends the boundaries of the human world and enters into a world where love reigns supreme.
..., the society begins to see love as a goal. Romantic love becomes a noble trait and just quest if one wishes to embark on it.
The last heroic couplet provides no hope and leaves only frustrating thoughts for the lover: "All wayes they try, successeless all they prove,/To cure the secret sore of lingering love". The speaker even argues that though Nature provides satisfaction for physical urges (e.g. hunger and thirst), Nature does not give Love the same satisfaction. The speaker describes a lover as a type of Sisyphus, enslaved in a vicious cycle of trying to accomplish the task (of fulfilling love's desires), only to have the problem roll back down and having to start over again.
Daru, the schoolteacher in a remote area of Algeria, is torn between duty and what he believes is the right thing to do when he is suddenly forced in the middle of a situation he does not expect. He must escort an Arabic prisoner to the nearest town. It is not that Daru has much sympathy for the man; in fact, he does not, and actually finds himself disliking the Arab for disrupting so many lives. "Daru felt a sudden wrath against the man, against all men with their rotten spite, their tireless hates, their blood lust." Unfortunately, Daru loves his homeland, and cannot bear to think of leaving, despite the chaos that is raging around him between France and the Algerian natives. I believe that Daru makes the right choice in letting the prisoner choose his own fate. Daru has reaso...
The Lais of Marie de France is a compilation of short stories that delineate situations where love is just. Love is presented as a complex emotion and is portrayed as positive, while at other times, it is portrayed as negative. The author varies on whether or not love is favorable as is expressed by the outcomes of the characters in the story, such as lovers dying or being banished from the city. To demonstrate, the author weaves stories that exhibit binaries of love. Two distinct types of love are described: selfish and selfless. Love is selfish when a person leaves their current partner for another due to covetous reasons. Contrarily, selfless love occurs when a lover leaves to be in a superior relationship. The stark contrast between the types of love can be analyzed to derive a universal truth about love.
Volpe, Edmond L. "James's Theory of Sex." Twentieth Century Interpretations of The Portrait of a Lady: A Collection of Critical Essays. Ed. Peter Buitenhuis. Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice-Hall, 1968.
When Simone de Beauvoir died in Paris in 1986, the wreath of obituaries almost universally spoke of her as the 'mother' of contemporary feminism and its major twentieth century theoretician. De Beauvoir, it was implied as much as stated, was the mother-figure to generations of women, a symbol of all that they could be, and a powerful demonstration of a life of freedom and autonomy (Evans 1).
In The Lais of Marie de France, the theme of love is conceivably of the utmost importance. Particularly in the story of Guigemar, the love between a knight and a queen brings them seemingly true happiness. The lovers commit to each other an endless devotion and timeless affection. They are tested by distance and are in turn utterly depressed set apart from their better halves. Prior to their coupling the knight established a belief to never have interest in romantic love while the queen was set in a marriage that left her trapped and unhappy. Guigemar is cursed to have a wound only cured by a woman’s love; he is then sent by an apparent fate to the queen of a city across the shores. The attraction between them sparks quickly and is purely based on desire, but desire within romantic love is the selfishness of it. True love rests on a foundation that is above mere desire for another person. In truth, the selfishness of desire is the
There has been a long and on going discourse on the battle of the sexes, and Simone De Beauvoir’s The Second Sex reconfigures the social relation that defines man and women, and how far women has evolved from the second position given to them. In order for us to define what a woman is, we first need to clarify what a man is, for this is said to be the point of derivation (De Beauvoir). And this notion presents to us the concept of duality, which states that women will always be treated as the second sex, the dominated and lacking one. Woman as the sexed being that differs from men, in which they are simply placed in the others category. As men treat their bodies as a concrete connection to the world that they inhabit; women are simply treated as bodies to be objectified and used for pleasure, pleasure that arise from the beauty that the bodies behold. This draws us to form the statement that beauty is a powerful means of objectification that every woman aims to attain in order to consequently attain acceptance and approval from the patriarchal society. The society that set up the vague standard of beauty based on satisfaction of sexual drives. Here, women constantly seek to be the center of attention and inevitably the medium of erection.
There is no such thing as a less superior race or the other because even though we are created differently as man and woman, we are still created equally, of which we deserve to be given equal opportunities in order to attain our full competence as human beings. In time, with the growing feminist movements striving for gender equality, women will no longer be seen and treated as the weaker gender and being a man will no longer be the norm anymore. Society will learn to accept how women are created with their own set of capabilities and their contributions as both men and women are needed in society because characteristics that are lacking in men are said to be present in women and vice a versa. We need one another as we are created for a purpose to complement one another and to continue on improving society for the better.
de Beauvoir, Simone. "The Woman in Love." The Second Sex. New York: Vintage Books, 1989. . Print.
In this essay I would like to emphasize different ideas of how love is understood and discussed in literature. This topic has been immortal. One can notice that throughout the whole history writers have always been returning to this subject no matter what century people lived in or what their nationality was.
This sense of individualism shared in the writing s of Zola and Herbert and depicted in the paintings of David and Delacroix shows people looking back in history that women in France were not perceived the same way in similar countries. A nation like our own didn’t give voting rights to women until thirty years ago. The culture of France and French people and their perception of women in society eventually helped France to be the classiest, most respectful nation of power.