In today 's society human beings truly aren 't themselves throughout the day. Humans go throughout the day performing daily activities such as going to school, work or going on a date and feel the need to act a certain way. There is a human instinct that tells the individual to act a certain way and to not truly be themselves so it is easier to go throughout the day by fitting in much more appropriately. This thrive to fit in is also known as the thrive to belong. There is no one correct way to belong into a certain category, class or relationship. All humans perceive the act of belonging to be accomplished by very different actions. Physical appearance, financial status and the amount of education one possesses contributes to the way one feels …show more content…
Therefore, a person may feel as if they belong well in society is because they possess a talent while growing up. Possessing a talent is one of the most beneficial traits a child could have. Talents range from person to person and from family to family. Each talent an individual holds is unique. One family or person can believe being talented is being able to play instruments very well while another family or person believes being talented is being the star player on a sport or cheerleading team. While raising children, many parents feel as if their children should possess a talent and if they don 't than they will have a hard time going through out their normal days at school because they will not fit in and belong with the other children. This fear that comes from a parent of their child not possessing a talent is derived off the fear that without a talent their child will not belong or fit in well at school with the rest of the children. It is important to parents that their children belong to certain groups whether it be from a having a talent in music or being talented athletic wise because they want the best for their children. In “Two Kinds”, Mrs. Woo pushes her daughter to learn the piano and is not very lenient when Jing-mei does not want to practice playing the …show more content…
Skin color is one of the first things people notice when they meet a new human being and if their skin isn 't the same as the color of the skin that populates majority of the area there is an automatic sense of not belonging from the individual. Out of all the previous reasons feeling as if one does not belong this is the most realistic reason. Lahiri , an amazing author who has so much confidence and so much love from the world and her family, feels as if she doesn 't always belong in regards to where she is traveling .For example she went to Italy. She was nervous because she was a darker and possessed a different skin color and language from the humans who reside in Italy. She didn 't let her skin color and language stop her from traveling. She had to find her own belonging and get over the fact that she isn 't the same look as them and her Italian will never be as good but she found her belonging and pushed through the trip and came upon success at the end of the journey.
The search for one’s identity can be a constant process and battle, especially for teenagers and young adults. Many people have a natural tendency to want to fit in and be accepted by others, whether it be with family, friends or even strangers. They may try to change who they are, how they act, or how they dress in order to fit in. As one gets older, society can influence one’s view on what they should look like, how they should act, or how they should think. If society tells us that a certain body type or hair color is beautiful, that is what some people strive for and want to become in order to be more liked. This was especially true with Avery as she longed for the proper clothes to fit into a social group and began to change the way she spoke to match those around her. As a young and impressionable sixth grader, she allowed herself to become somewhat whitewashed in an attempt to fit in with the other girls. However, Avery did not really become friends with any of those girls; her only real friend was
Everybody wants to be accepted, yet society is not so forgiving. It bends you and changes you until you are like everyone else. Society depends on conformity and it forces it upon people. In Emerson's Self Reliance, he says "Society is a joint stock company, in which the members agree, for the better securing of his bread to each shareholder, to surrender the liberty and culture of the eater." People are willing to sacrifice their own hopes and freedoms just to get the bread to survive. Although the society that we are living in is different than the one the Emerson's essay, the idea of fitting in still exists today. Although society and our minds make us think a certain way, we should always trust our better judgment instead of just conforming to society.
According to Silvia Bellezza, a doctoral candidate in marketing at Harvard Business School in Boston, “Nonconformity leads to positive inferences of status and competence when it is associated with deliberateness and intentionality..” Intentional deviance from a norm can project heightened status and competence by signaling that one has the autonomy to act according to one’s own inclinations (Silvia Bellezza). For example, in one study she found that participants perceived an individual deliberately wearing a red bow tie at a black-tie party in a country club as a higher-status member of the club and a better golf player than a conforming individual wearing a black bow tie. This enhances one's sense of freedom which allows a person to have their own identity in the crowd. Amanda Chatel, a writer for Bustle, claims that “Being your darling and the bizarre self who does their own thing is the best thing you can be... in life… the dating world, online or otherwise.” Being yourself can increase one's charm. As stated in the second paragraph, “those who march to the beat of their own drummer,” or follow their own constitution are, “far more attractive than those who are just like...everyone else.” Although some conformists accept who they are, your true identity can encourage positivity within yourself. For instance, this can be beneficial for one's self-esteem and confidence, constructing that
Similar to the author of “Sonnet, With Bird” Sherman Alexie felt when he traveled to England. Mr.Alexie quoted “” I am the only Indian in this country right now. I’m the only Indian within a five-thousand-mile circle.””(pg.214) which shows how he feels like he doesn’t belong. This may be the case for people who have moved to a new part of the world that is unknown to them or to someone visiting another area that they do not know. As for the people who have lived in a certain area who see newcomers, may see them as outsiders because technically they are coming into a new place which would make them outsiders. Another example would be Dre Parker from the movie “the Karate Kid”(2010 version) how in a part of the movie he expresses how much he dislikes living in China and how he doesn’t belong there. Dre Parker is treated badly by the other younglings that have lived their beforehand by beating him up and excluding him from their
Individualism and conformity--two very commonly used terms to describe anyone in today’s time. In comparison to the article “The Sociology of Leopard Man,” written by Logan Feys, one of the most notable quotes that relates to individualism and conformity is “to be a human is to be an individual human, with individual tastes [...][and]talents [...] that are distinct from those of others. Living in society, we are under constant pressure to surrender our individuality to the will of the majority, the school, the workplace, the family, …” (Feys Par. 6). To be truthful, conformity and nonconformity are used to determine a person’s inner-being, but every person is different, and in this case people will not always agree with each other on how they should live.
You are as others see you, yet others do not always see you as you are. With the importance others play on the sense of identity, it's no wonder that peers influence the minds of individuals early on in life. As young toddlers, children do not recognize biological
From society to family to media, external influences never seem to disappear from everyday life. These outward forces tend to leave a lasting impression on us for as long as we live. Because they are so prevalent in our daily lives, exterior factors will have a significant influence on us, specifically our sense of self and happiness. When defining our sense of self, it eventually comes down to how we interpret our individual self-image. In most cases, we do not truly know who we are from our own mindset. Therefore, we take into account the reactions that those around us have an influence on our actions and decisions. From these external effects, we create the persona of who we are. In his article, Immune to Reality, Daniel Gilbert explains
The story "Two Kinds" by Amy Tan is about a mother and daughter who have strong conflicting ideas about what it means to have a sense of self. This may be partly due to the mother growing up in China, which is a very different culture than the American culture where endless opportunities are available to anyone who wants to pursue them. Jing-mei's mother wants her daughter to be the best, a prodigy of sorts, and to have the kind of life, full of hopes and dreams that she did not have. In the beginning of the story Jing-mei liked the idea of becoming a prodigy however, the prodigy in her became impatient. "If you don't hurry up and get me out of here, I'm disappearing for good." It warned. "And then you'll always be nothing" (500). After disappointing her mother several times Jing-mei started to detest the idea of becoming a prodigy. The idea Jing-mei's mother had for her to become a prodigy was too much pressure for a small child and was something that Jing-mei was clearly not ready to be. As a result the pressure that her mother laid upon her only made Jing-mei rebel against her mother and she resisted in giving her best. Jing-mei did this because she only wanted her mother's love and acceptance for who she was not only what she could become. Furthermore, Jing-mei's point of view of being the kind of person that one can be proud of was very different from her mother's point of view.
Jing-Mei tries to live up to her mother’s expectations but feels that her mother expects more from her than she can deliver. She doesn’t understand why her mother is always trying to change her and won’t accept her for who she is. She feels pressure from her family when she is compared to her cousin Waverly and all her accomplishments. Soon the conflict grows to resentment as her mother tests her daily on academics, eventually causing Jing-Mei to give up while her mother struggles to get her attention and cooperation. Her mother avoids arguing with her daughter early in the story, continuing to encourage her to strive for fame. Her mother’s next assignment for her daughter is piano lessons. This goes along pretty well until her mother forces her to participate in a talent show. The daughter’s failure on her performance at the talent show causes embarrassment to her mother. Conflict is evident when two days later, after the talent show, she reminds her daughter that it’s time for piano practice and the daughter refuses to obey her mother. The conflict that the daughter feels boils over in an outburst of anger and resentment towards her mother for trying to make her something that she is not. Harsh words are spoken causing the mother to retreat and not speak of this event ever
Conformity is defined as behavior in accordance with socially accepted conventions or standards. This is not a good or bad thing, this just is. It exists as a compliment to earlier humans congregating into larger groups, using agriculture and domestication to create sustenance. Also, conformity is essential for life. We need people to share the same ideas, ideologies and a way of thinking in order to work efficiently and effectively. There many examples that exist like, at work or in your house and even within yourself. Sigmund Freud has explained the phenomena of group psychology in a piece titled, Group Psychology and the Analysis of the Ego. Using Freud’s theory of conformity I will explain the self, what we call “me”,and its different constituents using The Principles of Psychology by
Jesus, according to the Bible1, tells his followers a parable about a man who, before embarking
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment" Ralph Waldo Emerson. We live in a world where society tells you to be yourself and then judges you. We love in a constant fear of being judged or called a weirdo. Though the barons that hold us to this conformity are strong, many manage to break through. No other person in this universe is exactly like you. Everyone has a different quality to bring to the table and that is what makes out world such a diverse place. Embracing your assets to society and not trying to imitate someone else will not only change your outlook on certain situations but on your life as a whole.
Through the onset of peer pressure and family relations we see how these influence individuals into making certain decisions and acting in a way that will suit others. Meditations explains how even though it would be normal to want to follow our in-group that we must be able to break free of those confines that tie us down and become our own independent persons. It goes on to explain in a broad sense of group dynamics how our social norms and relations can cause individuals to sway in their own personal thoughts and feelings. An example of this would be discussing political preferences among friends and family. A person could change their own views based on what their family believes in and tells them about certain parties as they are growing up; this sways them to assimilate into group beliefs despite their own in order to blend in without any complications. This concept is not limited to family, but more common amongst peer groups and friendships. A good example would be when one wants to smoothly integrate into their desired group. Said group could have a political standpoint of conservatism while the individual’s personal views are liberal. To merge into the faction, they could state that their political party is the same as their peers, thus eventually altering their claims to being conservative. In “The Need to Belong can Motivate
It is important to understand the many different methods of educating gifted and talented students. Most people, whether as teachers, students, or parents, will at some point be faced with the many options of educating the gifted and talented. In the United States today, 3-5 percent of students are considered gifted. Defining whether or not a student is gifted can be quite difficult, but many would agree that gifted students “are able to learn material rapidly and understand concepts deeply” (Lynch, 1999). Within this paper I will discuss the process of identifying gifted and talented students and the different methods of educating them including tracking, grade advancement, and cooperative learning. Of these three methods I believe the most effective method used to teach gifted and talented students is tracking.
Conformity is vital to people’s life. Humans, being compound animals, live in a culture that works as a whole. Therefore, if there is a fault, the whole system might disintegrate. So, people are obligated to respect the affairs of others so that they can stay together as a whole. On the other hand Individuality, just like conformity, is necessary to life even despite the fact that modern person may not understand its worth. At one point people may want to be special from all the rest in one way or the other. As a result individuals might dress a bit in a different way as well as choose to do things we actually like. And, for on one occasion, we might create the opinions based on what we actually feel. However, earlier or later we are required to curb our impulsive desires so that society or culture does not tag us as eccentric or else weird, simply for the reason that people fear being alone.