The Elf Strike: A Short Story

The Elf Strike “HO HO HO! You have made me laugh Crissy! Where did this nonsense of a raise get in your head? We all had a deal. I bring joy to the kids in the world and you make the toys I deliver! No raise Crissy.” Santa said as the heads of the hundreds of elves stared at Crissy and Santa. “But, Santa, I’ve worked harder than any other elf this year! I even made 2,000,000 more toys than assigned because you wanted to give the snotty nosed brats extra things to play with! I also came in after hours! I’m sorry Santa, but I deserve that raise!” Crissy said stubbornly in her high voice. Her cheeks flared as she saw that Santa had stopped being so cheery. “Crissy. You are being very self-centered and stubborn at the moment and I wish for

We DEMAND that you treat us better than the common slave elf. We deserve to be treated with more respect than you have ever given us! Yes, all of the children in the world will be very disappointed if you don’t meet our demands, but at least for once we’ll be happy!” Bubble finishes, breaking out of the crowd to yell at Santa. “Well, I NEVER! I’ll just have to find other little helpers to make the toys. And by the way, you’re all fired!” Santa yelled as he stormed out of the room in his jolly old fat suit and his pink cheeks, looking all cheery. Three words. Corner lip lift. He smiles ALL the time. Even when he’s mad. The elves were stunned as they exited the shop where they had spent hundreds of years working, and trudged through the snow back to their homes. Hours later, Santa searched far and wide for other helpers. He finally found the creatures that would be willing to help. Goblins. Santa searched for any other option than staring at the goblins pointy ears and noses all day, with their pasty skin and their musty grey eyes. But alas, there were no other options. So, Santa called the goblins and offered them the job of a lifetime for 5 pieces of rotten fish and 7 pieces of rancid rat meat in exchange for their work. They reluctantly agreed, as they couldn’t wait to feast on the stinky old meat. They were there within an hour and got their orders to get to work. The goblins turned out out be HORRIBLE helpers. Every time they made the etch a sketches, they would

We HAVE to make those kids presents! Oh well, I guess we can’t do anything else about it.” Santa replied with deep sorrow in his voice. He boarded the sleigh and called his reindeer by their names. “On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer on Vixen! On Comet, on Cupid, on Donner, on Blitzen! And ON RUDOLPH!” he called as the sleigh began to shoot up into the air. Santa took a last look down on the town in the North Pole. He smiled sadly to himself as he remembered how the elves had endured so much that he had thrown at them, and he eventually drove them away. He was a bad Santa Claus. As the night went on, Santa found himself in a bit of a situation. He had read the tags on the presents and delivered them to the address, but he found that the addresses had been the wrong ones! He didn’t know what present went to who any more! This was a disaster! When he was in the last house hours later, he heard a BANG In the kitchen of the house. Santa rushed to the kitchen, and saw hundreds of pointy elf hats all crammed in one room. Santa gasped and got teary-eyed at the sight of his old