The author of Sex, Lies, and Conversation, Deborah Tannen, explained how men and women communicated differently through listening skills, body language, and emotions. Women perceived that men had weak listening skills because men had a difficult time listening to what women had said. Men did not always
Do men and women effectively communicate in the same way, or is it just a conversation of misunderstanding? There is constantly a new interest in whether men and women converse successfully. Professor and journalist, Deborah Tannen writes, “Sex, Lies, and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?” Tannen compares and contrasts all conversational styles, and explains how the expectation of dialogue affects how men and women converse. Tannen focuses on the subject of marriage and the imbalance of interest between male and female couples. The contrasting perspective however comes from, Deborah Cameron, author of, “What Language Barrier”.
As a human species, males and females share the same basic need to be understood and supported by their significant other through communication. One characteristic that greatly differentiates how men and women communicate is our sex and these differences are noticed when the time to talk comes around. Deborah Tannen, a professor at Georgetown University and author of Sexes, Lies, and Conversation believes that men and women greatly differ from each other in their focus of communication. According to Tannen, men conversation mainly focuses on obtaining social status and avoiding “being put down” by other men. As opposed to women, their form of conversation primarily focuses on achieving personal bonds and abstaining as far away from social
A conversation between a man and a woman is very different to one between a woman and a woman or between a man and another man. Both genders have very different ways of communicating. In the essay, “Sex Lies and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard For Men And Women To Talk To Each Other”, Deborah Tannen observes the different communication styles both genders have along with the factors of linguistic battle between the sexes, listening to body language, and the sound of silence. In the text, it is evident that there is a excessive extent that these linguistic differences are a major factor in the conversations between men and women. One of the major factors is the linguistic battle between the sexes.
If man and the woman both had the same communication ways they would be more successful in marriage. Many of the communication issues are brought up in the article “Sex, Lies, and Conversation by Deborah Tannen.” Tannen states that men and women argue with one another over communication which leads to marital problems and divorce. Men and women have different viewpoints on communication. Women see bad communication as the one of the major reasons for divorce. Also the way men and women communicate are very different.
However, another idea that has been more commonly researched in today’s society is that women and men think completely different and just do not understand each other. Steve Harvey’s book, “Act like a Lady, Think like a Man” is a prime example of the assumption that women do not understand how men think or how they feel when it comes to relationships. This book specifically, gives a direct representation of how most men function in relationships and it provides guidelines and advice for women from a man’s perspective about how to have a successful relationship. Furthermore, Steve Harvey’s book also explains many stereotypes that are common in today’s society about relationships and sex. “Act like a Lady, Think like a Man,” starts of by describing how men think and the status they need to achieve in order to feel like a man.
Men seem to struggle with intimacy and emotional expression, while women rely on this type of communication causing much struggle between the sexes. Lillian Rubin suggests that intimacy, a form of communication between men and women, itself is an ambiguous or difficult term to define, but asserts that it does embody the idea of the ability to put away a public persona and be cared about or care for the “real person”. This alludes to a struggle between the human need for intimacy and that for independence suggested by other sociologists. In addition to this idea of intimacy, Rubin looks deeper into the human psyche and analyzes the different ways in which men and women communicate their emotions. Rubin explains that while women can easily explain what emotions they are feeling and what has caused these, men struggle to verbalize their feelings and this causes animosities between men and women.
Women in this predicament usually blame themselves for the abuse and are told to make the best of it. Secondly, discussing information about domestic violence is important. The use of the “Power and Control” wheel is helpful in describing the controlling behavior of the abusive partner, with the message that the abusive behavior will likely continue to increase over time. Thirdly, it is important to develop a safety plan that addresses decisions regarding leaving and where to go, educates on safety-related issues such as returning back to the abusive partner, plans for handling the situation, and refers to domestic violence programs in the community. Sullivan and Bybee (1999) stated that there are few effecti... ... middle of paper ... ...ntervention: a new paradigm in ending family violence.
The website seems credible as Lachmi uses quotes and research from other credible sociologists and high ranking officials. This article will provide research that will help strengthen and keep the argument of divorce and its effects even. It actually has kinda changed my view on how I think about the topic because I see her point that a marriage is vital thing in a child's development and more than likely a divorce will impact it.
One of the researchers we took a look at was Deborah Tannen. According to Tannen the reason that men and women do not communicate well is that men and women use language differently. Women take the attitude that conversation is to explore solutions to common problems while men concern themselves more with getting information and hard data from conversation. Tannen states that what women look for in communication is human connection, while men consider status to be most important. They are looking for independence and are constantly looking for higher accomplishments.