Personal Narrative: My Parent's Divorce

When I was seven years old, my parents sat me and my sister down at the kitchen table and told us flat out that they were going to get a divorce. Now this wasn't really a surprise for us. As most kids with divorced parents will tell you, it’s never really the shocking reveal that movies portray. In fact, most of us suspect that the divorce will happen even before our parents do. But, even though their separation wasn’t a surprise, it was still hard for us. Having a new house, stepmom, not to mention custody rules aren’t easy things for a seven year old to understand and are confusing and scary at best.

Link- However, the things my parent’s divorce taught me have made me the person I am today. That’s why I based my talk around them.

For them it was the usual arguments, money, stress that put so much strain on a marriage that it breaks. Exacerbating this, my dad worked in advertising, which required him to travel all over the world filming commercials and taking pictures. My parents didn’t express their feelings until the very end when it was too late. This is how I learned the importance of communication in any relationship. Whether or it’s your teacher, your boss, your friend, or your significant other, communication is the single most important factor in a relationship. Our entire society is based on the idea of civil communication between people. Without proper communication and compromise, we would have never even evolved the point we are at. Even our ancestors relied on communication just as much if not more than we do. Without cooperation, world economics and trade would certainly not exist. We would never have scientific improvement or peaceful communication between countries. The ability to convey meaning to another person in a peaceful, non-hostile way is the basis for all

This is where a person is actively thinking of and getting ready to change what is bothering them, weighing pros and cons, tentatively thinking about the outcomes. In a relationship, this would be looking at your situation and weighing what you like about it versus what you don’t or considering the prospect of being single again instead of being tied down.

Once a person decides that they want to make a change, they begin Preparation for it. Thinking of how to break up, who will take which items, and moving out are all part of preparation. Although this step can seem unnecessary, for many people planning out their actions is exactly what they need to change. Planning, writing things down, even having mental conversations and arguments help us feel more comfortable and ready for change.

Finally, the times comes when you must actively make the hurdle to complete change. This doesn’t mean just telling your significant other you need some space, or time alone. True action actively breaking up with them in a clear, quantifiable way and committing to the goal set in Contemplation. This concrete definition is what makes action so hard. It’s easy to procrastinate action and put it off, or only make slight differences, but to truly achieve change you must have made the clear action of committing to it. But this does not mean that every action is a huge irreversible decision. In fact, most changes happen subtly, with a person making small changes.