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Hard To Get Twenty-Something Women And The Paradox Of Sexual Freedom By Leslie Bell Analysis

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Choices and types of lifestyle a young woman chooses help them to create their identity. However when the choices and the lifestyle chosen are affected by the various forces, it can create a fake identity of that young women. In “Selections from “Hard to Get: Twenty-Something Women and the Paradox of Sexual Freedom,” the author Leslie Bell insists that pressure from a young women’s traditional community and family create a complex situation for young women where they are forced to divide their choices and choose a lifestyle. The author writes about the uncertainty and lost identities of young women 's. Identity is a complex issue which can be divided into two parts; one being given identity and real identity. Given identity is best described…show more content…
Identity is not created based on perfection; it created based one’s qualities and unique choices. If a young woman follows and tries to create an identical identity for themselves to make an ideal identity themselves, it take away their chance of creating their own unique identity. Sometimes the desire of an ideal identity comes from the lack of good and stable family background. Alicia, a twenty-eight-year-old Hispanic woman interviewed by Bell, whose desire to have an ideal family stopped her from expressing her sexual desire. Bell discusses the reason of Alicia 's choices of an ideal identity, which is “the stability, structure, and love of a traditional family seems to afford all of the experience Alicia herself lacked in her upbringing. A traditional family became the solution to the problem of instability in Alicia’s mind. And being a good girl was the strategy Alicia adopted to enable her to have a traditional family” (39). Alicia despite her not so good family background wanted to have a traditional family life. She adopted the idea of being a good girl in order to achieve her goal of family life. She wasn’t anymore making choices; it was her will of having that future identity was making all her decision. The idea of a perfect identity and future eventually takes away the freedom of choices, which results in the creation of a fake identity. Bell writes that “Nor did being a good girl ensure that Alicia had satisfying and committed relationships. Alicia was frustrated that she’d ostensibly done the right thing but still ended up with two STDs and without a lasting relationship” (37). Trying to make an ideal identity creates the pressures of how people around see them. It also creates humongous pressure of taking a wrong step and thought of losing their ideal identity. This kind of
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