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Essays on effects of peer pressure on behavior
Peer pressure effects on youth
Peer pressure effects on youth
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Growing up acting like a tomboy was all I could do to normalize myself amongst boys. I noticed at an early age that I wasn 't respected when I acted like a girl, so I thought if I acted like a boy I might fit in better and make more friends regardless of gender. So I threw out my dresses and My Little Ponies and took in Thomas the Tank Engine and hats that hid my long hair. Unfortunately, all that rebuking my femininity got me was less guy and girl friends. All my kindergarten self had was one Matthew Phillips. Matthew Phillips didn’t whether I talked about Rescue Heroes or Polly Pockets. He was my first friend. As kindergarten went on, our moms of course noticed our growing friendship and had begun to start insinuating a romance between …show more content…
I had loudly proclaimed my attraction to women and downplayed my attraction to men and suddenly I had reached the point of friendship which my initial tomboy approach had wished for. I was ‘one of the guys’ but I was pretending. I came into my own by my senior year. I was feminine without fear and felt confidant enough in my friendships to begin to act more like myself. I found myself wanting a boyfriend and acted accordingly: I woke up early to do my makeup perfectly every day and talked in a higher pitched voice. Suddenly, my friendships became potential again. Investments were made, bets were placed. Who would she end up with? Who could win her? I found myself uncomfortably mirroring the girl who I had tried to win over years ago. All niceties were debts due and I had no say in the matter that wouldn’t lead to bitterness or disappointment. My reversed role served an irony that was sickly sweet. Once again I was stuck. Attraction, which should have been expanding my horizons, was limiting me. So why can’t women and men and women and women and men and men be friends? Gender has nothing to do with it. Until we can act without expectation, all we have to offer is not friendship or a relationship, but
Karbo Karen. "Friendship: The Laws of Attraction." Psychology Today 39.6 (2006): 90-95. EBSCOhost. Web. 18 Feb. 2014.
“Boys will be boys, and girls will be girls”: few of our cultural mythologies seem as natural as this one. But in this exploration of the gender signals that traditionally tell what a “boy” or “girl” is supposed to look and act like, Aaron Devor shows how these signals are not “natural” at all but instead are cultural constructs. While the classic cues of masculinity—aggressive posture, self-confidence, a tough appearance—and the traditional signs of femininity—gentleness, passivity, strong nurturing instincts—are often considered “normal,” Devor explains that they are by no means biological or psychological necessities. Indeed, he suggests, they can be richly mixed and varied, or to paraphrase the old Kinks song “Lola,” “Boys can be girls and girls can be boys.” Devor is dean of social sciences at the University of Victoria and author of Gender Blending: Confronting the Limits of Duality (1989), from which this selection is excerpted, and FTM: Female-to-Male Transsexuals in Society (1997).
Because of this, Steve Duck of University of Iowa refers to women’s studies as “understudied relationships” (Duck 1). In his book, Under-Studied Relationships: Off the Beaten Track, Steve delves into the complicated world that is friendship between women. He reveals that even the best of relationships, more often than not, will “dissolve due to geographical distance”, especially during the transition from high school to college (133). However, Duck claims that this occurrence during young adult transitional periods is “more detrimental to male friendships than female friendships” (133). He explains that, “men’s inability to maintain distal friends may be due to a lack of awareness about and skills to utilize effective strategies that maintain a [friendship]” (184). This argument implies that though males are invested in their friendships, they do not express as much emotional interest in these relationships as their female counterparts. While distance may seem challenging for women to overcome, they collectively put more effort into preserving their friendships than men. Duck further instills this concept by explaining that “women’s same-sex friendships tend to be based more on intimate and emotional discussions than men’s” (186). Men, Duck argues, lack the depth in their friendships that women possess, and, for this reason, have difficulty sustaining a friendship that is met with the strain
Some of my friendship do follow the gender patterns and prescriptions discussed in the reading. I have three female close friends and many guy friends. My three female friends are Asialynn, Liz and Maritza. The type of friendship I have with Asialynn and Liz, follows the typical gender friendship pattern. Our friendship is built on dialogue. We became closer through talking, disclosing personal experience, emotions, fear and our problems. We try to understand one another and be each other’s shoulders. In the reading Janice states that, “one of the worst things about being a female is not having permission to be selfish or jealous or not to care about your friend”. I can relate to Janice comment especially in the friendship I have with Asialynn
After reading Allison Baker's " Better Be Ready 'Bout Half Past Eight" it made me realize that discovering one's self is a situation our world is going through right now. In her short story one of Allison Baker's main characters, Zach tells his best friend of thirty-eight years that he is going to have a sex change. Zach tells Byron that he feels trapped in the wrong body and that he is going to become a woman. Byron is shocked about what he is hearing and can't seem to deal with the news. He's known Zach for some time now and he didn't pick up any of the signs about Zach's sexuality. Through the rest of the story you see Byron coping with the news. He talks to his baby boy about the situation and tells him that he will grow up to a man. He also starts to think about his own sexuality and even goes as far as applying makeup to his face. Byron watches the transformation of his best friend Zach into a woman named Zoe. As the story comes to an end Byron, his wife Emily, and their son Toby are at Zoe's shower. Byron squeezes Zoe's hand and I think, right then and there, he finally comes to terms with Zach's decision and is happy for his friend. As his friend walks away, he says that his son Toby Glass could grow up to be anything.
Migliaccio (2009) addresses that it is commonly believed men are less trusting and honest in a friendship, but the relationships usually examined are male and female. In male friends, the other feels that it is not just the fact they are men that need to be taken into account, but the impact of gender roles that also play a role. In the study, Migliaccio (2009) examines friendships between men in occupations typical of their gender such as military and nontraditional such as a hairdresser. Being masculine is described as “being stoic, both physically and emotionally” (Migliaccio, 2009, p.228) which impacts friendships. In male friendships, it is also explored that men avoid being perceived as feminine. Another factor, Migliaccio (2009) considers is either a man works with more females rather than males. “In short, women and men experience and define intimate friendships in different ways, and neither should be judged by the standard of the other” (Migliaccio, 2009, p.229). It is determined that gender is not as much of a factor as gender roles are in male friendships. This article will provide evidence for the impact of the male gender versus gender roles within the theme of masculinity. It examines many factors that go beyond gender as well as the lens these relationships are viewed through
To begin this paper off, in figure “a” below, there is a photographic transition of myself as the woman I usually embody in my day to day interactions, and how I transition from a female to the male b...
Friendship has been crucial to the survival of women especially those whose social class puts at a disadvantage. Margaret Andersen, in her book, Thinking About Women: Sociological Perspectives on Sex and Gender, asserts that “Despite long-held assumptions that women’s primary identity was attached to men, research now shows the important role that friendships between women have, including women who live within stable heterosexual relationships” (94). While her claim on women primarily being identified with men is an assumption maybe contested, she points out the importance of friendship to women, which necessarily does not have a sexual undertone.
Everyone needs a person to share his or her feelings. However, men and women tend to find different ways and people to express their emotions. The movie “She’s the Man” shows the theory that woman is higher in self-disclosure in general, compared with men. Same-sex friendship between men is usually less intimate than same-sex friendship between women. As a result, it is better for a man to have an intimate opposite-sex friendship to lessen his loneliness. More importantly, men should try to be more open.
Men and women seek out cross-sex friendships to satisfy a need that cannot necessarily be filled in their same-sex friendships. According to Lenton and Webber, of “Cross-sex Friendships”, friendships are meant to serve three valuable functions: to provide us with help and support, to provide our cognitive needs for stimulation of shared experiences/activities/ideas/gossip and lastly, to meet our social-emotional needs by giving love and esteem (Lenton & Webber, 2006). This proves that there are so many reasons why the forming of friendships is so instinctual to us as humans. The formation of cross-sex friendships adds a
The long-running stereotype that men and women cannot be “just friends” is demonstrated from casual friends all the way to friendships at work. And with 61 percentage of women in the workplace in 1990 (The First Measured Century), it’s a stereotype that is getting harder to break. For years, development of men and women’s friendships has been a trope in TV and movies. Boy and girl become friends, guy develops feelings, girl gets boyfriend, guy becomes jealous and confesses feelings, and girl realizes she’s been in love with guy all along (Borreli, L. 2016). These expectations of men and women in friendships are bad for business though. Cross-sex friendships are crucial in the workplace. Friends in the workplace provide information, networking, and support that are invaluable for both job performance and satisfaction (Kimmel & Aronson 2014, 542). Bonds between cross-sex friendships are charging according to a study. Men and women often see each other as friends or confidants rather than romantic interests. There are other types of bonds than romantic connections that can occur and does occur between males and
The Gender Schema Theory was developed by Sandra Bem and explains how gender schemas are developed when a child forms a basic gender identity. A gender schema is based on “children’s interactions and observations of others, their environment, and the culture” and is used to organize and direct behavior based on their society’s gender norms and expectations (Williams, Gender Schema Theory). With this in mind and going back to my gender socialization, I developed a gender schema that is mixed between the two genders and not really either specifically male or female. My behavior as a child was not always appropriate of a little girl gender role; I did not like to play with dolls or with tea/cook sets but instead would rather play sports or games outside. I would rather do things that were appropriate of a little boy gender role. Having this mixed gender schema as a child, I believe it helped to be more open-minded as I got older. When seeing males do things that are stereotypically of a female gender role, I see no problem with it when others might. The same is for the opposite – if I were to see a female do something of a male gender role, I would have no problem when others would. An example would be seeing a male dress up with a face full of makeup. Many individuals may have a problem with this, since makeup is generally part of a female’s day routine, but I do not see an
“Other results suggested that friendships can interfere with men’s and a woman’s mating strategies. Both men and women reported that competition to attract members of the opposite sex was a costly aspect of same-sex friendship.” (Bleske 16) The conclusion of the article also suggested that those friendships cause jealously, status confusion, and not being loved in return like they want to from their friend. Same sex friendships have any benefits, but also have a plethora of loss. There are certain questions that should be asked when determined the validity of same sex friendships and if the study is ever conducted again it should be in the environment where there are a different variety of subjects. Men and women can very well be friends, but at what cost and it based on the sex of the person you ask. Looking at the previous article from Fiske I have gathered some major important points among some similarties and some
The social construction of gender leads to the creation and sustainment of sex roles that we have been taught to adhere to since birth that results to social doings through the creation of gender – who we talk, how we dress and who we associate with. Men are taught to masculine qualities like not crying and women are taught to do feminine characteristics like playing with dolls and wearing dresses. A prime example of this is in the article written my Diane Reay, that analyzes the construction female behavior, where those who identified as “girlies” care about their appearance and we regarded to as stupid by their classmates. Those who challenged the feminine norms, where referred to as “spice girls” and labeled as bitches or little cows by their teachers because they where thought to be negative influences to the rest of the class. Reay states that, “boys maintain the hierarchy of social superiority of masculinity by devaluing the female world,” (Reay, 2014, pg. 257) by esteeming males over females, it creates gendered expressions that depict once gender more promising that the other in society, where self-declared tomboy Jodie stated that, “Girls can be good, bad or- best of all – they can be boys,” (Reay, 2014, pg. 257) which solidifies the social norm of males being better than
The benefits of a cross-gender friendship are: companionship, inside information of the opposite sex, open conversation, protection, and social support. These qualities in the opposite gender for a cross-gender friendship make the friendship meaningful and the potential for a quality friendship. One of the main reason that men and women form cross-gender friendships is for companionship, much like same-gender friendships are formed (Gillespie, Lever, Frederick, & Royce, 2015). The reason why people form friendships is because they want to have conversations and someone to hang out with. If there are no feelings present from either party in a cross-gender friendship, one can provide the other with “inside” information about the opposite sex and how to attract them (Bleske & Buss, 2000). Another benefit, that men ranked as their top benefit was talking openly to the opposite sex (Hart, Adams, & Tullett, 2016). April Bleske and David Buss conducted a study measuring the benefits of cross-gender friendships, and in the protection category, women evaluated that the potential for receiving protection from their male friend was more beneficial than men did. Heterosexual, cross-gender friendships change people’s lives and have an effect on views of the self and other, and they provide social support like same-gender