Spanking

Are parents these days being too soft on their children? As with any argument there are at least two side to this, many believe that in the past parents were too harsh in punishing their children. Their belief is that children will learn with some time in the corner and no cookie after dinner. On the counter stance, people believe we were too easy with discipline in the past and we are slowly getting softer and softer resulting in worse behaving. According to modern media and modern culture, harsher punishment of our children is frowned upon and in many cases is looked on in anger by others. What many choose to ignore is that it is the parents job to teach children how to act and their values, and outside of abuse, should be able to use

Narvaez suggests that children who are spanked over time become more and more aggressive. Now there is no way to prove this research without conducting the experiment or gathering the information. Dr. Jared Pingleton on the other hand says “Disciplining our sons and daughters is part of the tough work of parenting, but it will pay big dividends in the long run.” Dr. Narvaez chooses to only look at the extreme cases of a parent choosing a more physical punishment, what she fails to see is that spanking shows kids that our actions have consequences. As Dr. Pingleton says “Spanking, then, can be one effective discipline option among several in a parents’ tool chest as they seek to steer their children away from negative behaviors and guide them toward ultimately becoming responsible, healthy, happy adults.” When used correctly, spanking helps children understand that when they misbehave then something bad will come. Based on Dr. Narvaez’s research children will respond better in the long run when parents are feared as well as

A reason this could be is that, in earlier generations the whole policy was “Children should be seen not heard,” and as the kids grew up into stable, well adjusted adults, they raised their kids in a more “loving” manner. The problem with this is it made the kids see their parents more as friends than authority figures, resulting in less obedient, and more sensitive children. Those children now growing into more sensitive adults. “Many parents try to raise their child in a way that they wish their parents had parented them. It sounds nice on paper, but it just doesn’t work. So if your parents were distant or rigid with you, or they seemed uncaring to you or they seemed self-involved to you or they made horrible personal mistakes and didn’t give you the guidance you needed, you shouldn’t overcompensate for that by violating parent-child boundaries with your own child. This can be characterized as a “reaction formation.” In reaction to deficits you saw in your own parents, you form a way of parenting that’s not healthy for you or for your child.” This article specifically outlines the problems with being your child’s friend rather than being their parent, trying to treat your child like you would treat a peer results in children who are more defiant towards authority figures. When a parent isn’t an authority children and teens never learn that sometimes