Deborah Tannen Sex Lies And Conversation Analysis

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A conversation between a man and a woman is very different to one between a woman and a woman or between a man and another man. Both genders have very different ways of communicating. In the essay, “Sex Lies and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard For Men And Women To Talk To Each Other”, Deborah Tannen observes the different communication styles both genders have along with the factors of linguistic battle between the sexes, listening to body language, and the sound of silence. In the text, it is evident that there is a excessive extent that these linguistic differences are a major factor in the conversations between men and women. One of the major factors is the linguistic battle between the sexes. As Deborah explained, linguistic battle between …show more content…

Both sexes have grown up with their own mentality of how communication in a friendship or relationship. This causes major issues to occur when men and women have dialogue with one another. They misinterpret or simply misunderstand the way the other gender would appreciate to be listened to or spoken to. An example of this misunderstanding and linguistic difference is found in body language. Body language is one of the most important obstacles in a discussion between men and women. Women like to speak face to face “their eyes anchored on each other’s” (342). As for men, they like sit “at angles from each other and look else where in the room” (342). So when both genders use these specific conversation habits with each other, it causes irritation and an unpleasant impression for both parties. The woman assumes the man isn 't listening to her speak, and the man believes he’s being scrutinized under her intense stare. This linguistic difference creates a blockade between both genders, and doesn 't allow communication to flow between the …show more content…

In short, this means “listener- noises”. For females it is comforting to know that the listener is still following along when they speak, so they expect “listener-noises”. As for men, when speaking to one another they tend to stay completely silent until the speaker has fully finished telling his story. When bringing these two qualities into a talk between a man and woman, it can cause irritation on both sides. As Deborah shares, for a woman, when a man stays completely quiet it appears she has lost his attention and interest. As for the man, when the woman offers her advise or makes “lister-noises” it come across as pushy and impatient. The unfortunate part is that both parities mean no harm with their listening skills. They simply have habits that the opposite sex is not accustom

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