Every daughter forms a very close relation with their mothers before they even come to the world or understand anything. Every mother has a unique way of protecting their children. In most Asian families, mothers think putting their own control and limitations on their daughter’s life will protect and secure them. While doing that they forget that not every daughter would let their mothers take over their life. In “Two Kinds” by Amy Tan, the mother’s harsh rules have made Jing-Mei rebel against her mother and regret later in life. Similarly, in “Saving Sourdi” by May-Lee Chai, Sourdi’s mother’s traditional ways of forcing decisions on her daughter’s life has enforced Sourdi to suffer through an abusive marriage. In both the texts, the authors …show more content…
Her mother has taught her to follow their Chinese tradition in which the mothers are always right no matter what. Sourdi had no say when the guys were teasing her and when Nea injured one of the guy, her mother asked Sourdi to take care of the wound. Sourdi’s mother “made Sourdi get the first-aid kit from the bathroom” (pg.122). Unlike any other girl, Sourdi didn’t ask her mother why she has to show concern when it’s not her fault. Without saying anything to her mother, she silently followed her mother’s order knowing that she is not doing right by forgiving the …show more content…
She knew she couldn’t do anything to make her life easier such as giving divorce or leaving her husband because that would insult and hurt her mother’s feelings. Sourdi’s mother thinks “It’s always like this. Every marriage is hard. Sometimes there is nothing you can do” (pg.128). Maybe in Chinese society divorce is not so common or simply not for women. All women have to go through that in a marriage. Instead of solving Sourdi’s problems, Sourdi’s mother gives her advice of how to bear her sufferings and get adjusted with the life that she
The speaker's relationship with her husband had to go over a few changes. At first, she did not want anything to do with her husband, she was still fourteen years old consequently feeling unready on handling such a big responsibility, but she had no other choice but to stay with him as she was a part of an arranged marriage. Later on, the speaker accepts her relationship with her husband and
Yan Zhitui states that, "women take charge of family affairs, entering into lawsuits, straightening out disagreements, and paying calls to seek favor...the government offices are filled with their fancy silks." (Differences between north and south, 111). Yet, even in the Qing dynasty women were still restricted by and expected to uphold more traditional ideals, especially in the public eye. So, in the end, through her virtue, Hsi-Liu’s two children we able to become upright. Here, there is a split between what a woman is supposed to be according to old Chinese tradition, and the realities facing women in Tancheng. The loss of her husband, and economic hardship had forced His-Liu to behave in a different way, as if she were usurping the power from the eldest son so she could teach the two boys a lesson about being good family members. While she still maintains the ideals of bearing children, and being loyal to her husband, even after he dies, out of necessity she is forced to break from Confucian ideals of being only concerned with the domestic issues. This too put her at odds with the more traditional society around her, as the villagers pitied her sons, but vilified the Hsi-Liu for being so strict with them (Woman Wang, 65). Had she remarried, she would have been looked down upon even more because she would had broken her duty to remain faithful to her deceased
“ May-Lee Chai was the first one in her family to be born in America; she lived in fourteen states and four countries. Her short story, “Saving Sourdi” was inspired by a family from North Dakota and a variety of people she met from traveling the world. The Narrator is in first person point of view and it is told by Nea, the younger sister of Sourdi. The plot of “Saving Sourdi, it shows Nea being aggressive, impulsive, immature, and overly protective of her older sister Sourdi. The plot shows different encounters where Nea tries to save Sourdi, who turns down the help. The plot and characters in Saving Sourdi shows the dynamic of a younger sister who is trying to save an older sister who does not want to be saved.
Not only does it deal with gender identity and the relationships between Chinese-American cultures, but it also deals with mother-daughter relationships. Amy Tan shows us how mothers and daughters mirror each other. Every daughter in this novel hears about their mother's life and sees some comparisons to her own life. "All women are daughters and must resolve the conflicts inherent in the mother/daughter relationship if they are to understand themselves and ultimately to establish their own identity". (Internet 1) No matter how old they get, mothers and daughters play similar roles.
One type of effect the Chinese mothers’ expectations has in their relationship with their “Americanized” daughter is negative since the mothers are unable to achieve anything. An-Mei Hsu expects her daughter to listen and obey as the young ones do in Chinese culture, but instead receives a rebellious and stubborn daughter, “‘You only have to listen to me.’ And I cried, ‘But Old Mr. Chou listens to you too.’ More than thirty years later, my mother was still trying to make me listen’” (186-187). Instead of the circumstances improving, the mother is never able to achieve anything; her forcing and pushing her daughter to the Chinese culture goes to a waste. They are both similar in this sense because both are stubborn; the daughter learns to be stubborn through American culture and wants to keep herself the way she is, whereas the mother wants to remove this teaching from American culture and does not give u...
In the story 'Two Kinds'; by Amy Tan, we are shown the struggles of a young girl Jing-Mei. Her struggle is that of a young girl growing up and trying to find her own sense of identity. Her troubles are compounded by her mother, who convinces her that she can become someone important. Because of her mother's constant overbearing behavior, Jing-Mei does everything she can to annoy and displease her mother even to the point of being a failure. This fight to find her own identity against her mother's wishes shows how parents cannot control their child's life; they can only point them in the right direction and let them make their own choices.
She honored her parents as she should, but longed for them to pass. In the beginning of the story she said "I had never expected my parents to take so long to die.” She had taken care of them all of her life she was in her fifty’s and her parents in their ninety’s. She was ready to live and break free of all the rules and duties put upon her, they were like chains binding her and holding her down. She was ready to explore to go on journeys and adventures she was already aging all she wanted was to be free. Her parents’ death let her run free, she left Hong Kong to start over and maybe find love, in any way possible, maybe even through food or luxuries. She wanted to be rebellious of her parents I’m sure she knew they wouldn’t approve but she didn’t care she wanted change. All her life she had followed so many rules, she had to fight to teach, to learn, to be with friends, her fight was finally over. She now had no one to rebel against, she now had the freedom to
Jing-mei never liked the plans her mother had for her. Her mother wanted her to be
Throughout the short story, one sees the internal issues that Akiko faces as she goes further into motherhood. At the beginning of the story Hatsuko, Akiko’s daughter, reveals how she knew of the dislike that her mother had on her during her childhood and adolescence. In the letter that Hatsuko wrote to her mother questioning her, why “she disliked her” (1). Akiko then responds to herself by saying that “her feeling[s] about her daughter [are not] abnormal” (2) which is an example of how she is denying the societal roles. Entered in the role of a mother Akiko longs to escape out of the role as seen as her constant rejection of her daughter. Akiko though cannot leave the role of a mother to become her own person once more due to the Confucius influences that govern her life.
For many of us growing up, our mothers have been a part of who we are. They have been there when our world was falling apart, when we fell ill to the flu, and most importantly, the one to love us when we needed it the most. In “Two Kinds” by Amy Tan, it begins with a brief introduction to one mother’s interpretation of the American Dream. Losing her family in China, she now hopes to recapture part of her loss through her daughter. However, the young girl, Ni Kan, mimics her mother’s dreams and ultimately rebels against them.
An-Mei’s mother is evidence of this. For example, when An-Mei details her Grandmothers treatment of her mother it is clear that cultural values have prevented her from achieving full autonomy and thus a full expression of universal human rights. When An-Mei’s mother becomes a concubine following her husband’s death she disgraces her family. An-Mei’s grandmother disowns her daughter because of the shame this brings her family. While An-Mei’s mother’s identity stems from the family, without a husband and then as a fourth wife she brings her family shame. In one scene her mother cuts off a piece of her arm to serve in a soup for An-Mei’s grandmother. While this was done of her own volition, the act of cutting off flesh and mutilating ones body is only acceptable because of the value placed on self-sacrifice for family. Additionally, this practice is only expected of women and is how “daughters honor mothers (Tan,48.)” Later, An-Mei’s mother commits suicide so that An-Mei may live a better life unconstrained by the shame of her mother. Her mother sacrifices herself for her family and loses her right to life so that An-Mei may achieve happiness. The notion of a good mother recurs throughout the story and is almost always in the context of self-sacrifice. Often, the American daughters fail to recognize the sacrifices made by their
The satisfactory results will make them more comply and willing to put in the effort to parents’ requests. Author Chua also explains that it is ok for “Chinese mother” to talk trash or put their kids down as a punishment for their misbehaved. Whereas Western mother is being very selective on their words of choice toward their kids when they are misbehaving, she uses examples such as: “Hey fatty-lose some weight”-Chinese mother (10) versus Western mother “health” “beautiful and incredibly competent” (10). Author Chua relates her own experiences with her parents teaching style and how they make her feel like a piece of trash when she talked back to them. However, she explains that had made her a better person, and she had more respect toward her parents. Chu goes on and identified the three biggest areas that set Chinese parents and Western parents apart. The first area is the kid’s self-esteem. According to author Chu, Western parents tend to nurture their kids’ self-esteem; continue to support and encourage their kids even though the kids failed at it; whereas Chinese parents will destroy their kids if they ever failed at
In Amy Tan 's Two Kinds, Jing-mei and her mother show how through generations a relationship of understanding can be lost when traditions, dreams, and pride do not take into account individuality. By applying the concepts of Virginia Woolf, Elaine Showalter, and the three stages of feminism, one can analyze the discourse Tan uses in the story and its connection to basic feminist principles.
In her short story "Two Kinds," Amy Tan utilizes the daughter's point of view to share a mother's attempts to control her daughter's hopes and dreams, providing a further understanding of how their relationship sours. The daughter has grown into a young woman and is telling the story of her coming of age in a family that had emigrated from China. In particular, she tells that her mother's attempted parental guidance was dominated by foolish hopes and dreams. This double perspective allows both the naivety of a young girl trying to identify herself and the hindsight and judgment of a mature woman.
To begin with, “Two Kinds,” helps us to better understand relationships between parents and children by showing us how parents struggles for control with their children. First, Amy Tan, a second -generation Chinese describes parents and children using power and control to get their needs and wants met. She demonstrates that as children grow, they try to gain power in order to get control over their lives. For example in the story her mother believed that she could be anything in America. Consequently, she wanted her to become a prodigy. Amy would take tests from her mother every night. However, she was frustrated with every test and the drive inside her began to vanish as she decided to be disobedient to her mother. “And then I saw what seemed to be the prodigy side of me because I had never seen that face before. I looked at my reflection, blinking so I could see more clearly. The girl staring b...