Why Is Being A Helper?

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I have always loved helping people. When I was child I use to walk around with a toy doctor kit, because I wanted to be a nurse. However, when I came to Cal State Fullerton I started to become interested in a persons mental health instead of their physical health. Being a helper has led me to have some co-dependency tendencies with other people, specifically my best friend Jocelyn. I met Jocelyn in high school and she is the greatest friend I could ask for. We have extremely different taste in music and movies, however we still click because of our way of thinking. Jocelyn unfortunately suffers from depression and ADHD. In high school, I didn’t know that she was sad or that she had those kinds of feelings. Yet, one day when we were hanging …show more content…

She was crying all the time and yet again I felt helpless. I didn’t know how to comfort her or what to say to make her feel better. I was extremely scared that she would try to hurt herself again and at night I always had to have my phone with me just in case she needed …show more content…

My anxiety would spike and I had no idea had to control it or what to do. I had no idea that her wellbeing affected mine so much. I didn’t even have a word for my co-dependency until I took HUSR 415 and realized I had those symptoms. This was the first situation I realized how invested in Jocelyn’s life I was and realized I had to stop. My co-dependency was affecting my life and I couldn’t handle that on top of my own anxiety issues. I had a serious chat with Jocelyn where I explained to her I could not help her in the way she needed. I told her that she needed to find help, because these issues she had I couldn’t fix. Luckily she took my advice and sought out help for herself. Our friendship has grown so much stronger since that experience. I still find myself battling to fight off my co-dependency, but with my psychologist’s help I have been able to let go little by little. Knowing that I can be co-dependent has also made me aware to the fact that this can happen again in my life. I now know to keep on the look out for any of these symptoms in case I find myself in this situation again. I can’t have someone’s life take over mine no matter how much I love the

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