I Go Back To The House For A Book, By Billy Collins

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People make simple decisions every day: what time to get up, what clothes to wear, what book to read. However, we don’t usually stop to think deeply about those small choices. In the poem “I Go Back To The House For A Book” by Billy Collins, the narrator goes back to his house for something to read at the doctor’s office. However, another part of him does not go back to the house, and instead that part just sets off on his way. At first glance the poem may seem humorous and lighthearted or simply an unrealistic take on the repercussions of a small decision. However, author Billy Collins uses word choice in “I Go Back To The House For a Book” to force both the narrator and reader to grapple with difficult questions of true personality, mortality, …show more content…

The narrator states “another me that did not bother / to go back to the house for a book / heads out on his own,” (6-8). The phrase “did not bother” implies careless, thoughtless action - the man did not decide, he did not choose - he just simply “did not bother” to get a book. The speaker seems to look down on the other version of himself as someone who will be less educated as a result of not getting the book. The narrator’s dismissiveness is shown as he describes his other self as “a ghost in his ghost car” (11). The use of the word “ghost” suggests that the version of the man who left first is less corporeal and less important. If the “two selves” concept is not taken literally, it feels as though the narrator is internally scrutinizing his actions and imagining how others will judge him. The speaker continues to struggle in his relationship with his other self, describing his other self as “a good three minutes ahead of me — / a spacing that will now continue / for the rest of my life” (13-15). The difference in tone creates a confusing atmosphere - is the speaker celebrating the disconnect from his thoughtless, more ignorant self, a “ghost” he has escaped? Or is he mourning the loss of an essential part of himself, and the creation of an insurmountable three minute spacing? The narrator is conflicted about his true nature, and worries how others will view him, despite his …show more content…

The speaker seems to be relieved that there’s someone on his side, forging his life’s path ahead of him. However, the second description, “hound that pulls me along/shade I am doomed to follow”, is darker. In Greek literature, shades were spirits or ghosts. The speaker feels that he no longer has any agency, and whatever he does, he is “doomed” to be dragged along by the ghost of himself. If narrator is forever doomed to be pulled along by the shade, then the narrator will be pulled along the path the ghost forges for him. Although he was once a heroic scout, he is now a vicious hound, pulling the narrator through the dog park that is life. Just like all people, this path of life ends with inevitable death. The author

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