Relationship Narrative: Personal Narrative

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The fairy tales say that once upon a time a girl met a boy; they fell in love, and lived happily ever after. Reality is not that simple. Long-term relationships force couples to get to know each other, involve themselves in each others’ worlds, fight through the hard times, and eventually develop deeper connections through distinctive stages of Knapp’s relationship model. Although I have dated the same person for over two years, the stages of our communication make it seem as though I am now dating a different person following dissolution and subsequent repair. However, even the most exhilarating of roller coaster rides develop through a combination of ups and downs, much like the stages of a relationship. Initial contact came the moment he caught my eye during cross-country. I perceived immediate attraction and my friends began referring to him as Paige’s crush. Similarity of interests connected us and provided opportunities for interactional contact through high school soccer. The relationship developed from afar as we watched and learned about each other through the proximity of our neighborhoods, living only a mile apart. Exhilarating, heart-pumping rushes of emotion overwhelmed me each time John called. Showing Interest, John pursued me and wanted to spend time together. Our personalities meshed. Uncontrollable Duchenne smiles took over when I saw or thought about him. Team dinners required no need to speak because our nonverbal communication and eye contact said it all, demonstrated by winks and silly faces. By the end of the summer we were bound and officially dating. Getting to know each other continued as our involvement expanded and disclosure developed quickly. I soon learned topical boundaries when bringing u... ... middle of paper ... ...le because we live in reality. It taught us how to improve through the stages of relationships. My long term relationship reached new levels of involvement and intimacy through difficult times that others may use as a reason to terminate what they once had. Instead, we used the low points as a way to better appreciate the high points of our new reality. Continuing our relationship still today, we learn to cooperate through listening and receiving before responding in a harsh tone. Knapp’s cycle continues on a course headed towards repair or termination and John and I learned to work through our issues in a calm and rational way because we have complete trust in our relationship. John and I take our mistakes and avoid negative disclosure in each discussion. John and I found a system of communication that works for us and every relationship will be different.

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