The Hurt Locker, Directed by Kathryn Bigelow

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As most of you know by now the movie The Hurt Locker won the Oscar for movie of the year, and this makes me very angry. My civilian friends keep asking me why I'm so mad, because most of them enjoyed watching it. Simply put it's because the movie is full of lies, exaggerations, and ugly people. 'But it's a movie' they say, 'of course it's not realistic'. That's strange.. because the back of The Hurt Locker box says 'Powerfully Realistic'. Yet this movie is about as far from realism that a movie can be (this claim includes all movies about time travel, and vampires, but excludes any movies starring the Wayans brothers).

Don't get me wrong here- I'm not a stickler for all military realism. The military uniforms in the Transformers are a ridiculous hodgepodge of different branches, but no one cares because America is fighting off evil giant alien robots, and nerds like Shia Labeouf are getting with impossibly hot women like Megan Fox (still not convinced that she's not an evil alien robot here to destroy monogamous relationships). The point being that it's not the realism, it's the claiming to be real that disturbs me. Although I will say that there is the occasional fantasy movie that breaks rules of realism as well. X-Men 3 is a prime example of what I like to call fantasmical stupidity.

In the climactic scene of the movie Magneto rips up the entire Golden Gate Bridge and relocates it so that his minions can cross the bay to Alcatraz and capture the mutant boy wearing a livestrong bracelet http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKc4BWvWtuM. Let's assume for a moment that Magneto has developed his power over the metallic elements enough to move a 4200 feet long and 746 feet tall steel bridge a couple miles. Plus the bridge was f...

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...arine's brain isn't functioning properly and should not be limited to just TBI. For example- drugs, abused as a child, hit by a train, licked too many envelopes, crack baby, gasoline fight, former or current resident of Texas, Nickleback, Aids, watched JEM and the holograms as a kid, shot in the face, molested by a priest, American Idol finalist, horrific sunburn, allergic to peanuts, testicular cancer, Yankees fan, or just plain dumb.)

I guess what's the most troubling about The Hurt Locker is just how little the general public knows about the war and deployments. This begs the question: if that movie can dupe millions of Americans while we are currently engaged in two conflicts what else can Hollywood do? Next thing you know someone will claim that not all vampires are beautiful high schoolers whose skin shines in the sunlight (I'm on to you Libby Presnell).

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