The Anatomy Of A Family Secret, By Robin D. Stone

Secrets, while sometimes necessary, can be detrimental to relationships, specifically family relationships. A secret, defined as being “kept from knowledge or view” can take on many forms, including those that are necessary for one’s wellbeing, those that are done for personal reasons, and those that are in the interest of the person keeping the secret. Robin D. Stone wrote, “The Anatomy of a Family Secret,” deciphering why those we love keep secrets from their families, and what are the outcomes. One of the biggest, most personal secrets one can keep is about their family, especially when they can change the outcome of many things in their life. “The Anatomy of a Family Secret,” starts out talking about two sisters, who found out that they

While toxic and health are like black and white, secrets can have aspects of both, and are sometimes hard to distinguish. Toxic secrecy, involves some sort of shame, usually for the secret-keeper, while healthy “privacy” does not. Unhealthy secrets cause shame, pain, regret, and anxiousness, while healthy secrets do not. With secrets interlaced into relationships, specifically harmful secrets, they will not return to normal until these secrets are revealed, in the correct ways. Counseling is a responsible action to take when thinking of revealing a secret to family members, and once it is done in the correct way, “authenticity and trust can return to your

Family secrets can adapt a cultural aspect, and can then be seen from a psychological analysis. As humans, we want to please others, and this can play a role in why we keep secrets; to prevent friction within relationships. In Orgad’s piece, “The culture of family secrets,” he goes in depth into the psychological analysis of why we believe keeping secrets is okay. He uses the example of The Holocaust, a tragic event in our world’s history. Secrecy happens, without actively trying to keep secrets, we change the course of history to protect our children from the horrors that happened. Secrecy is a form of protection in many ways, but also can be harmful and create a worse situation if done for the wrong