Personal Story: The Ants That Marched

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Personal Story: The Ants that Marched It happened fourteen years ago and I was in the first grade, but I still think about it sometimes. It is the earliest memory I have of ever being cruel to someone. Like most people, I only have a vague handful of memories from the first grade, like the first time I ever saw a hot glue gun, or the first time our teacher showed us a calculator. But this day sticks out vividly. It was a nice sunny day, I had finished school, and had just gotten off the bus at my bus stop. Usually I would go straight home on my kick-scooter, which I ‘parked’ at the bicycle stand next to the bus stop, but on this day I walked back with a girl called Emily. Emily was in the same grade as I was, and her house was in the same direction as mine, but we still weren’t …show more content…

Maybe it affected her relationships with boys, I wonder. Maybe it made it even harder for a shy person to make new friends. Maybe it made her grow up to be insecure, as if there was something unacceptable about her. Again, I don’t know. Or maybe she turned out fine. Or maybe, like the vast majority of experiences you have in the first grade, she couldn’t remember it the next week, or never thought about it again. Maybe she’s conquering the world, doing groundbreaking research at the university level. Whatever the answer is, I don’t know, but I do think about it. On the flip side however, I have also wondered how it has changed the course of my life. Maybe the memory of that moment made me unwilling to make close friendships with girls until I was in middle school, in fear of ever harming someone that way again. Maybe carrying that guilt weighed upon my willingness to have new experiences, in the fear that like my feeding the ants, it would somehow end with an emotionally distressing

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