How To Cross The Tiber River

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The Tiber River is no joke. Everyone always thinks it an incredibly daring feat to cross the Tiber, but one capable of being done. Ha, they wish. It’s not as easy as I make it look. Let’s start from the beginning. The war between the Romans and Etruscans was raging as it seemed to always be, ever since Lucius Tarquinius Superbus was removed from power and ran to the Etruscans seeking refuge and revenge. He somehow convinced the Lars Porsena, the king of Clusium, that he was wrongfully removed from power and exiled out of Rome. How I’m still unsure, but still Porsena rounded up his troops and marched down to Rome. The newly established Roman Republic had somewhat of a freakout before finally coming to an agreement that they needed to somehow unite the country. The Republic purchased grain from the Volsci and from Cumae, nationalised licenses for the sale of salt, as well as …show more content…

A bunch of my girlfriends were also among the youths traded away for the safety of the rest of the Roman Republic. Upon arrival to the Etruscan camp we were dispatched to a slave area where we were informed to get cleaned up for dinner. While getting cleaned up I noticed that there was a distinct lack of guards and tried to formulate a strategy of escape.
While formulating a plan I realized that I would have to get an edge over the guards, and the only way to do that would be to expose my super powers. I quickly ran through a list of all my superpowers and realized that flying, super strength, size manipulation, and telepathic communication wouldn’t be very useful. With my remaining super powers - super speed, super agility, chameleon, and the power of healing any wound - I formulated a plan that was virtually invulnerable.
I went to tell the rest of my girlfriends of my plan and luckily found them all together in a remote spot that had very few guards. After listening to my plan they all agreed and I told them we would leave when the coast was

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