First Day Of School Analysis

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In my essay “First Day of School” I flashback to myself as a timid second grader beginning her first day at a new school. During the day, I experience meeting new friends, encounter a problem with a student who is angered that I am spending time with her friend, and overcome a situation with the bully by standing up for myself when feeling invisible in a new school. In my analysis, I will describe the drafting steps I took when beginning my essay, several writers advice I followed to create an interesting story, and changes I made after my instructors revision. When drafting my memoir I first created an outline to help organize my thoughts. I worked on this outline for about two hours, identifying the major points I wanted to make and supporting it with concrete detail. Throughout my writing process, I first started with the idea of my sixteenth birthday, however I realized quickly that this did not have much of a story line to capture the reader's attention. Next, I pondered with the idea of writing about a childhood memory with my grandmother but did not think there was much of an inner story there. I finally decided to write about my first day at a new school in second grade. This event …show more content…

I think this overall made my essay flow better. Next, I took his advice by focusing on an overall dominant impression and adding in more detail about my encounter with the fourth graders. When forming my essay I left out major details of what happened when I saw the fourth graders. I decided to add my experience with the bully and how I was able to overcome my shyness and stand up to the bully when I felt alone as the new kid. This section of my essay is where I developed my inner story and elaborated about the event to capture the reader's attention. Furthermore, I tried to develop the essay to make it interesting and demonstrate how the event shaped

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