Cassie Talaga

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Cassie,
Do you honestly think I have no right to be angry or frustrated? For the past 3 frickin' years, I've stayed up all nights some nights thinking about you and us; and, working my ass off to show you that, though there's distance between us, that you can bet your life that my love is there and strong for you. I know what you feel when you say that you need someone and something to touch. I've finally gotten in touch with you in a way that I can hear your voice. Just as I was saying in my last email, there will be some fucking hard ass times, and then there will be worse ones. This is one of those times that is going to be hard, and I believe if there was any love there for me, you wouldn't just give up. I've always been skeptical about how you felt, that's just how I am, but then finally, in one email, after I called you for the first time you said, and I quote, "...before we had our talk, I mean.. yeah.. I liked you ALOT...". But then you went on to say that you finally knew in your heart that you truly loved me. I'm beginning to think you were just caught up in the moment. And to think, that was exactly a month ago. One frickin' month ago, you said you were sure, and now you aren't. I know for a fact that love is something you cannot all of a sudden gain, or lose. It will take time as in more than a couple weeks, but more like a couple months or years.
I want you to know that, yes, I'm mad. But I am also mad about you. I feel like crying just like I did the night before you left. I had a dream a couple days ago, that ended with a phrase from no particular person saying, "Soon, your love will go through trials and tribulations, and intelligence and patience will fade as your frustration takes over; but, do not falter. Persevere in your true ways, and light will shine again!" I memorized that as I wrote that down after I woke up. That scared the shit out of me, because I spent that whole day thinking it was, in fact talking about you. I see now, maybe it is.

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