Recent studies have revealed that relationships/marriages fail significantly due to the main
reasons such as finical issues, trust issues, and communication.
In society today all people try to find love, someone to be their soul mate, someone
they wish to spend the rest of their life with and feel happy.
Unfortunately it does not seem to work out that way most of the time, there are a few
key reason’s to why that is.
This essay will explain all the important key’s to remember in your marriage/relationship
so you can have a happy successful life.
Mary Mendel writes, “NEXT TO HAVING CHILDREN, getting married is
perhaps the most important event in anyone’s life. But for many men and women, what
began as a promising ( relationship all too frequently break down.”
(Mary Mendel, 20)
1. Communication
Communication plays a big role in marriage/relationships, If you cannot
communicate with your spouse about certain issues you feel you have then you will get
nowhere, it is best to try and talk about thing’s instead of turning it into a argument
.
Everything leads back to communication.
Mary Mendel writes, “ A good marriage takes a lot of work on the part of both
Take for occurrences, section 9, "men are somewhat Pollyannaish about the condition of their marriage, while their spouses are sensitive to the inconvenience." This is not generally so for one side or the other. It is increasingly that couples need to take in the dialect of the other individual and recollect what it took to get the individual
A History of Marriage by Stephanie Coontz speaks of the recent idealization of marriage based solely on love. Coontz doesn’t defame love, but touches on the many profound aspects that have created and bonded marriages through time. While love is still a large aspect Coontz wants us to see that a marriage needs more solid and less fickle aspects than just love.
families which is very important. Life is a difficult journey and most of the people try to make it
Many times the love that a person is looking for is the one that a person doesn't realize.
goes on to say that many marriages do not turn out as the person might have hoped which
the lives of many people all throughout the world. The constant need for love is
In class there have been many discussions over the relationships and marriages among the books we have read. When someone thinks of marriage, a fairy tale with a happy ending might come to mind, or possibly a safe haven for those looking for something stable. In The Awakening by Kate Chopin, and “The Yellow Wallpaper” by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, marriage takes a turn for the worse. Marriage is no longer the happy memories in a lifetime. It can be the thing that hinders the women in these stories from developing their full potential or experiencing the world and other lifestyles. Through these texts and this time frame, we will analyze the meaning of their marriages, how they function, and the end result of both.
lives. Many people search for hope, happiness and fulfillment when they should not be searching
most people in reality need love and happiness to go on and survive. While we try to fix our lives with
Human beings are not isolated individuals. We do not wander through a landscape of trees and dunes alone, reveling in our own thoughts. Rather, we need relationships with other human beings to give us a sense of support and guidance. We are social beings, who need talk and company almost as much as we need food and sleep. We need others so much, that we have developed a custom that will insure company: marriage. Marriage assures each of us of company and association, even if it is not always positive and helpful. Unfortunately, the great majority of marriages are not paragons of support. Instead, they hold danger and barbs for both members. Only the best marriages improve both partners. So when we look at all three of Janie’s marriages, only her marriage to Teacake shows the support, guidance, and love.
experience for them that completely changed their lives and the world as they knew it.
Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance. If the disposition of the parties are ever so well known to each, or ever so similar before hand it does not advance their felicity in the least (Austen 23).
In the book, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work (1999) John M. Gottman provides insight on the seven fundamental tools to construct positive relationships. Through long years of research, Gottman studied married couples and noted degenerative behaviors that hindered the formation and attainment of a long and healthy marriage. Gottman research focused on several key behavioral predictors of divorce, which he calls the “The Four Horsemen”; Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling.
The idea of finding a "soul mate" never resonated with me and the concept seemed flighty and unrealistic. For me love has always meant finding a life partner and building a satisfying relationship on mutual trust, respect and friendship, I use to think that love was a choice.
Schlessinger, L. (2007). The proper care & feeding of marriage. New York, NY: Harper Collins Publishers.