Once the feeling of insecurity is planted in one’s mind, it will grow like a weed and destroy surrounding relationships. Some believe, although a common misconception, that the root of such an outcome is jealousy and misogyny. While in actuality, the ultimate factor instead is lack of confidence and assurance in oneself. Only through possessing self regard can one prevent corresponding results. If not, feelings of anxiety, single mindedness, and paranoia will eventually lead to relationships ruining. Insecurity forms anxiety within a relationship which consequently, leads to its downfall. As shown in the tragic play Othello, written by Shakespeare, the mind will search for absurd reasons to validate their fears and doubts against their partner. …show more content…
Iago’s schemes for Othello’s downfall all originate from suspicion with his wife Emilia. He is fully aware that, “...it is thought abroad that ‘twixt my sheets has done my office”(1.3.378-379). Iago’s mistrust with both Othello and his wife, leads him to turn against those who trust him. Acting out from his delusion that his wife is unloyal, Iago spread gossip which consequently lead to the death of Othello, Desdemona, and Emilia. In a relationship where insecurity is prevalent, one will surely become scared of losing their loved one. Taking actions based off of paranoia will never result in a prospering relationship, rather the opposite will undoubtedly occur. Also delusioned of being jeopardized of losing someone, are men considered the head of their families. In fact, an article named Men Who Hate Women the author named Nadeau reports, “many believe their wives should be subservient to them. When their power is threatened, many lash out violently” (Nadeau 2). Some men shift to assault when faced with the potential of losing control in a relationship. Turning to physical harm instead of civil communication further shows the extent of insecurity in men whose positions are wavering. Similar to Iago, both are acting out based on the idea of losing their significant other and self-consciousness. As a result, their relationships will be destroyed. Moreover, some may state that these men act violently …show more content…
The importance of eliminating these feelings in a relationship is revealed in what being self conscious can manifest into. Not only does it demolish the connection between lovers, but it also causes one to become anxious, single minded, and paranoid. Thus, further driving partners apart. Therefore, in order to prevent relationships from coming to an end, one must be confident and secure with who they are before entering a relationship. As a result, it will lead to better trust, forgiveness, and communication. Only through avoiding insecurities can a relationship
Never become complacent and let my interpersonal relationship becomes stagnant, which can lead to resentment and conflict. Weighing the cost verses the rewards may not always be the solution for my relationship; simply, because the cost may ultimately outweigh the rewards. The need for autonomy can have reverse effects and may not lead to the closeness that’s expected. In, turn the very thing that, I try to be open about in my relationship can inadvertently cause me to protect my feelings in the
A contributing element to someone who is insecure mindset is thinking they don’t deserve someone, so they will do anything to please them. “I skip English everyday so you and me can ride to school together”; she gives up one of the biggest parts of her education to ride to school with Raheem. She holds back what she wants to say and do to please Raheem. Her willingness to do and say anything even if it goes against what she really thinks shows that she thinks that’s the only way he’ll stay with her.
Insecurity and low self-confidence can be influential and very determining factors in shortening an individual’s life span; especially if you are an individual who is marry and has jealousy issues. In Robert Olen Butler’s short story “Jealous Husband Returns in Form of Parrot Analysis.” We can appreciate the perfect example of how trust issues and not been able to exercise strong communication skills can make you a coward, a miserable, and pathetic low life human being; having such characteristics will eventually deteriorate and liquidate your relationships with your loved ones. In this essay we will analyze the different elements that Robert Olen Butler uses in order to educate
“Insecurity kills all that is beautiful” in Shakespeare’s Othellothe tragedy clearly testifies to this theme as it tells the story of marriage of beauty and passion that turns to ashes all due to insecurity. More specifically, the story of Othello, a successful Black Mauritanian general of the Venetian army, tells of an interracial marriage to a White upper middle class Venetian wife, Desdemona, who is determined to make their love eternal. However, due to Othello’s decision to appoint Michael Cassio over his trusted ensign Iago, Iago tells Othello that Desdemona is having an affair with the newly appointed white lieutenant, Cassio. In response, Othello kills Desdemona by smothering her with a pillow. Once finding out that Iago made the whole story up, Othello kills himself out of guilt and honor. Many may wonder what was the cause of Othello’s core problems that commenced his demise to kill his love and then take his own life. Jealousy, such as a man losing a lover to another man, can originate from deep insecurities about maintaining honor and a sense of manhood. For example, Othello’s conflict
This happens when one the partner’s feels that they need to make themselves more appealing so as to attract or to be attractive enough to their desired mates. When one falls into this trap you are afraid that no one will accept you as you are and insecurity gets in the relationship. Insecurity can lead to doubts in a
Othello: The Destruction of Honor In The Tragedy of Othello, William Shakespeare tells the tale of the “noble Moor” whose honor and innocence bring about his downfall. Shakespeare writes of the power of jealousy, and the art of masterful deception and trickery. The story primarily takes place in Cyprus, during a war between the people of Venice and the invading Turks. In this play Shakespeare shows the feelings of Othello’s embittered right-hand man of, Iago, who feels he is passed over for a promotion and swears his revenge. He proceeds to manipulate his friends, enemies, and family into doing his bidding without any of them ever realizing his ultimate goal.
Othello, through Iago’s manipulation and Desdemona’s compliments to Cassio, starts to mistrust his wife because he is convinced she is having an affair and becomes convinced to the point he can not believe his wife’s faithfulness. Iago’s disrespect and cruel views towards women enables him to manipulate Othello because he does not care about the fates of women and would rather not deal with them. Also, Iago hurting his wife both mentally and physically illustrates his mistrust towards his wife because he does not believe his wife is faithful and he hurts her, in efforts to prove his superiority. Lack of communication between spouses in relationships can bring many arguments because they are unwilling to admit their mistakes or admit something bothering them and once it all these emotions boil up inside it can lead to the argument becoming worse. These intense arguments can lead to spouses acting upon emotions, which they will later regret their actions during these fight, but in the moment they are too blinded by emotions realize their mistakes. Miscommunication can also lead to others being labeled based on other’s perspective of the person, which is bad because they might not act that way, but if the person does not confront them then they will always assume the other person’s view of a person is correct, instead of learning the truth by meeting the
A.C. Bradley describes Othello as "by far the most romantic figure among Shakespeare's heroes"(Shakespearean Tragedy, 1). This is an unusual description of a man who murders his own wife. However, Othello's feelings of hate for Desdemona started as an overwhelming love for her when their relationship began. This transformation from love to hate also inflicted the characters Iago and Roderigo and like Othello their hatred resulted in the murder of innocent people. Roderigo's love for Desdemona was transformed into hate towards any man that he thought was loved by her. Iago's love for his job and his wife, Emilia changed into a destructive hatred of Cassio and Othello. As a result of their hatred Cassio, Emilia, and at the end themselves were killed. The connection between love and hate in William Shakespeare's "Othello" is the ugly feeling of jealousy that caused such transformations. Jealousy can be described as a fear of losing something or someone that is valuable (Godfrey 2). As minor as this feeling appears to be by that definition, it can take on varying degrees of damaging behavior. Othello, Roderigo, and Iago became paralyzed by jealousy. Their thoughts, actions, and behaviors were ruled by it. Jealousy caused their inability to the act rationally. They became paranoid and unable to love. This paper will examine the jealousy that caused love to turn into hate for Roderigo, Othello, and Iago.
Insecurity is a power drill that drills through one’s confidence and destroys their self-esteem. Whether it be looking in the mirror and being unsatisfied with one’s appearance, or having to speak up in a meeting. Insecurities have the ability to control one’s life and emotions. As Vin Diesel always says, “It's insecurity that is always chasing you and standing in the way of your dreams.” As a matter of fact, insecurities can come to one in many ways such as body language, personal habits, and society’s expectations.
In Othello, the titular character is a visible minority who holds a high position in the army but falls victim to manipulation by his seemingly trustworthy ensign and friend. While the theme of jealousy remains the main reason for the eventual death of both Emilia and Desdemona, the preservation of honour and reputation also fuel the characters’ actions toward the women. Therefore, the men in the play act cruelly and unjustly in order to defend their honour. While the conflicts between the Othello and Iago seem to be due to jealousy, the play suggests that the men are scared of the women and their power to destroy their honour and reputation.
Dainton and Gross (2008) specifically discuss the repercussions that negative behaviors such as jealousy induction may have on relationship maintenance. For instance utilizing negative maintenance behaviors such as jealousy to react to a relationship is negatively associated with relationship satisfaction. This research is tied in with the idea of social support and how individual respond to their partners. Researchers agree that jealousy in relationships can have a negative impact, yet also enhance romantic feelings and satisfaction based on how jealousy is initially communicated (Dainton & Gross, 2008; Yoshimura, 2004). “An essential idea behind this study is that the ways in which jealous individuals communicate their jealousy influence how the target communicatively responds. The results showed that targets of jealousy expressions most strongly respond in the style of the initial expression” (Yoshimura, 2004, p. 95). The way jealousy is expressed initially based on attitude and mood can affect the response of the partner and at shaping and guiding the relat...
Insecurity in many cases is known as lack of self-esteem, and self-esteem as talked described by many psychologists, is very important. Kendra Cherry, a well known writer, went on to cite psychotherapist Nathaniel Branden who is most known for his work in the psychology of self-esteem in her article, What Is Self-Esteem? , saying:
It takes more than words to create a safe, exciting and secure relationship. Too often the signals we send are not those we intend to send. When this happens, both connection and trust are lost in our relationships.
Through the first part of the play Othello remains the calm voice of reason, believing himself to possess a “perfect soul” (1.2.36). This is significant because when he grants himself the role of an exempt man from a rigid moral code because his wife is supposedly cheating on him, it shows his true nature, motivated not truly by jealousy, but protection of his honor. Therefore allowing a caveat for the murder of his supposed love, which he is proudly open about, proclaiming to Emilia, “She’s like a liar gone burning to Hell! ‘Twas I that killed her.” (5.2.159-160). Othello is desperate for people to know that he has swiftly dealt with his allegedly cheating wife to defend his honor and reputation. Rather than maintaining his reasonable disposition he possesses for a large duration of the play he gets blinded by jealousy, turning to lunacy. An example of this is when he begins to spew gibberish in the presence of Iago, upset with his wife's alleged infidelity, saying, “Pish! Noses, ears, and lips--is’t possible? Confess--handkerchief--O, devil!” (4.1.50-52). In the earlier moments of the play Othello’s words are meticulously chosen as to come off as intelligent and a man of high stature, however in this moment he breaks the trend of powerful, well thought out words. It is proof that jealousy can attenuate the better judgement of those who
Healthy, secure relationships are a two way and a reciprocal rocess. Each person first loves themselves and then the other person in equal measures and theytogether have a happy, meaningful, ongoing relationships