Essay about Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?

Essay about Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?

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In "Where are you going, Where have you Been?” written by Oates, a young high school girl named Connie finds herself to be swept off her feet by a man named Arnold Friend, who is much older than she is with dark intentions. In the end Connie takes off with the man after he threatens her existence. But this all could have been prevented if her parents were to intervene.
If Connie’s parents would have been aware of her emotions, by showing concern toward her feelings, Connie might have been wiser than what she really was. In a teenage girl, confidence is what sets apart from feeling like a queen verse a peasant. When Connie’s mother would say comments such as "Stop gawking at yourself. Who are you? You think you 're so pretty?" (Oates, par 1) it can ruin a fragile mind, making it feel weak and ugly. A way to fix such problem can be done with “Communicate with kindness and respect” such as realizing that the teen themselves is a developing mind. If not, the teen may develop disrespect and bitterness toward the world around the or like in Connie’s case, were she felt very insecure about her outer appearance. (Osterweil)
When Connie states that her mother "makes (her) want to throw up sometimes," it shows how poor of a relationship they have. Connie’s mother is constantly promoting her older sister, June as a productive young lady by saying “June did that, she saved money and helped clean the house and cooked”. If her mother would have acknowledge Connie’s existence, maybe Connie would not have felt as if “her mind was all filled with trashy daydreams.” (Tips)
In “Were are you going, Where have you been” Connie’s parents are not the only parents to not be aware of their child’s actions. “The father of Connie 's best girl friend ...


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...e time, but bright and pink on these evenings out; her laugh, which was cynical and drawling at home—"Ha, ha, very funny,"—but high pitched and nervous anywhere else, like the jingling of the charms on her bracelet.” Such type of action shows how she feels uncomfortable in her own skin that she feels the need to change her personality to be something she’s not. Whether her true self is with her family or not her parent, it is a parent’s duty to bring out the best in Connie.
Connie’s parents failed to met the basic traits of a parent. They brought Connie’s spirit down, they ignored her, they cared more for one sibling and they were not able to realize that she had some sort of double life. Which all these traits tie in with why Connie ran off with a man twice her age and why parents should be more aware of they do to their children and how their children feels.







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