Lies can be expressed in a variety of ways, as listed in the reading “The Way We Lie” (Ericsson, Pg. 216-224). At times you can tell a lie without getting noticed but other times you can get caught in between a lie, and what good is the truth when you could hurt the other person’s feeling such as saying “ Man, you don’t look good today” or “ Oh my gosh, what are you wearing? This isn’t the 20th century” there are always different ways people take in criticism either they take it positively and approve and grow from that, or they can look at it negatively bringing their self-esteem down and then even making them think that there outer appearance as well as inner isn’t considered ‘right’. Even though we don’t seem to see their reaction to the truth or unfriendly reminder of something that was said to them, those words may still mock them, since it was about them. The thing about a ‘white lie’ is it’s just a small lie, only meaning to boost up other people whereas, when it’s not a white lie, the lie is usually used to protect, oneself in a situation. Although white lies are said to never be told they at times can save relationship(s), even giving good complicates to people to make them feel good about herself and , and plus everyone lies why should you be looked down upon when others tell white lies as well.
For those with relationships either, with their families, friends, and/or married or just a couple we all seem to think that a white lie, would damage and ruin a relationship which at times it could, but it all depends on the white lie you deliver to the person or group of people. When Jennifer Moses indicates in her article, “Did I remember to go to the dry cleaners? Yes--but it was already closed. Did I enjoy that delicious ...
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...lie? When we know that there different in there ways? All I’m saying is that a white lie won’t harm anyone or thing, it’s placed in life so it can help others, and try to even save time with everyday tasks at times telling the truth it can bring us down, at times lies can as well, but it’s knowing when to stop when you believe you have gone too far with them. Now, I’m not saying you to tell a white lie every day to your loved ones, and bosses. I’m just saying that tell them, when it’s mostly needed!
Works Cited
(Chernoff Marc n.d) ,http://www.marcandangel.com/2007/10/04/the-15-most-common-white-lies-and-why/
Moses, J. (1996). The lies that are good for your marriage. Good Housekeeping, 223(6), BIH12. http://ezproxy.mohawkcollege.ca:2054/ehost/detail?sid=c784cfe7-01cd-445e-88e1-3a48a1d73898%40sessionmgr15&vid=4&hid=23&bdata=JnNpdGU9ZWhvc3QtbGl2ZSZzY29wZT1zaXRl
Traditionally, it is agreed that any and every form of telling the truth is always the best thing to do. In the essays of Stephen L Carter and Stephanie Ericsson, this ideal is not exactly true. It is expressed in "The Insufficiency of Honesty" as well as "The Ways We Lie" that honesty is hard to come by and that there is more to it than believed. The authors convey their views by first defining what the concept is, picking it apart, and then use common occurrences for examples of the points they had made.
In the beginning of “The Ways we Lie”, Ericsson begins by lying to the bank, her client, and even her partner. What would have happened if she had decided to tell the truth? Well Ericsson tried going a week without lying and this is what happened, “The bank charges me $60 in overdraft fees, my partner keels over when I tell him about my travails, my client fire me for telling her I didn’t feel like being on time, and my friend takes it personally when I say I’m not hungry” (Ericsson). The truth is being honest can hurt just as badly as telling a lie. Ericsson lists several ways that people lie, “The White Lie, Facades, Ignoring the Plain Facts, Deflecting, Omission, Stereotypes and Clichés, Groupthink, Out-and-Out Lies, Dismissal, Delusion” which are just a few ways that we lie. Ericsson successfully makes her case, “Sure I lie, but it doesn’t hurt anything. Or does it”. By incorporating personal experiences in her essay, which she demonstrates moments where she has been a liar and a candid person her audience is able to accept reality. Yes lying is bad of course it is, but “We lie. We all do” whether it hurts someone or not is simply a matter of how it’s being told. As Ericsson confirmed through her one week of honesty, “it’s not easy to eliminate lying completely from our
As John Ruskin once said, “The essence of lying is in deception, not in words.” This essence is debated in “The Ways We Lie”, written by Stephanie Ericsson, and “Doubts about Doublespeak”, written by William Lutz. In “The Ways We Lie”, Ericsson talks about the different ways people lie on a day to day basis. By comparison, in “Doubts about Doublespeak”, Lutz discusses the different forms of doublespeak that many individuals frequently use. Lutz considers doublespeak as a language that distorts the meaning of words in order to deceive another person, and only “pretends to communicate” (83). Although both authors agree that lying is about the use of deceptive language, Ericsson describes this use of language as occasionally being necessary,
Christopher describes a white lie in chapter 79 as “It is where you tell the truth, but you do not tell all of the truth.” Therefore, he only says a partial truth about what he did to remove himself from a position where his parents will know about the part which would put Christopher in trouble. Such as the white lie Christopher uses on page 48 when his father asks where he has been and Christopher replies “I have been out.” Christopher does not speak the specifics about what he did while he was out so he does not mention to his father about how he had snooped around Mrs. Shears’ garden because he knows his father would disapprove of his actions. In addition, on page 66, Christopher uses a white lie to avoid telling his father that he had talked to Mrs. Alexander about Mr. Shears. Christopher only answered his father’s question with what he brought at the shop and about his interaction with Mrs. Alexander’s dog; however, he did not mention his conversation with Mrs. Alexander. Christopher uses white lies in ethical situations to avoid trouble. However, he still answers his father with partial truth so he does not
First Ericsson discuss white lies, she describes white lies as when a person “assumes that the truth will cause more damage than a simple, harmless untruth” (Ericsson 181). A person decides that it is better to tell the lie rather than to tell the truth because of how they perceive the outcome will be. Ericsson believes that people should not use white lies because they’re “[deciding] what is best for someone else” (Ericsson 181). When people use white lies they’re assuming that what they are doing is good for the other person, even if they do not know for sure that the other person will benefit from not knowing. On the other hand in the book “The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time” by Mark Haddon, the main character, Christopher does not believe in lying but he uses white lies. Christopher says, “A white lie is not a lie at all. It is where you tell the truth but you do not tell all of the truth” (Haddon 48). In this situation, Christopher’s
22). People mindlessly respond to avoid their true emotions. Truthfully, I was not fine, but exploding inside with nervousness. However, I didn’t attempt to burden anyone with my lack of confidence, so I told this untruth. Even though white lies may be harmless, they can lead to other deceptive lies labeled by the authors as gray, red, blue and colorless lies. Why do we tell lies? Interestingly, according to the (Banaji and Greenwald, 2013), “evolutionary biologists have proposed that Homo sapiens is indeed hard-wired to tell lies,” (page 25). Furthermore, we want to appear favorable to our friends and family and this may pressure us to justify our lies. According to (Banaji and Greenwald, 2013) it is referred to as “impression management,” by social psychologists (p.27). Thus, lies allow others to see us as we want to be seen, such as I wanted the group to see me as a confident person who could handle obstacles and superbly interact with
In the short story The Ways We Lie, Stephanie Ericsson describes many different categories of lies. She first starts out explain the little white lie, describing it as a lie which is told when trying to avoid hurting someone. An example she gives in the text is, “telling a friend he looks great when he looks like hell can be based on a decision that the friend needs a compliment more than a frank opinion”(Ericsson, 2004, 121). Ericsson then describes facades, facades according to the Ericsson is when a person shows you what they want you to see, but it’s not the real them. Stating “facades can be destructive because they are used to seduce others into an illusion” (Ericsson, 2004, 122). A perfect example of facades are when a person has to
In “The Ways We Lie,” Stephanie Ericsson discusses what she sees as ten types of lies: the white lie, façades, ignoring the plain facts, deflecting, omission, stereotypes and cliches, groupthink, out-and-out lies, dismissal, and delusion. After naming and defining each type she goes on to discuss when they are acceptable or beneficial, and what their negative effects are. Lying has become a part of everyday life and Ericsson wrestles with the justification of that while questioning when all the lies will end.
In “The Ways We Lie” by Stephanie Ericsson, the author uses her knowledge to talk about the different ways of lies and how those lies affect the liar, as well as the people who had been told lies. According to the author’s essay, there are 10 types of lies that people encounter every single day: the White Lie, Facades, Ignoring the Plain Facts, Deflecting, Omission, Stereotypes and Cliches, Groupthink, Out-and-Out Lies, Dismissal, and Delusion. Throughout the essay, it is connoted that people are lying in various ways even though they are not intended to. I had been taught that lying is a bad habit. According to Ericsson, there are many types of lie and I did three of them in my life: the White Lie, Omission, and Out-and-Out Lies; however, I can defend my lies for good purposes.
In today’s society, everyday people struggle with telling the truth. As you grow into a young adult one thing that many kids are told is that a “white lie” is much different compared to a lie. Although everyone knows that this ultimately is not true, it’s become such a normal act that people tend to just go along with it. Many people try to justify this immoral action by claiming that they are using their lies for good, instead of evil. But it is often hard to know at what point a lie becomes an irreversible, cruel action as opposed to an alternate explanation. Huck Finn, the main character and narrator in “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn” by Mark Twain, also runs into this dilemma frequently throughout the story. Growing up in the South in the middle of slavery, Huck feels “forced” to be dishonest about his identity many times in order to
Telling the truth can have some consequences, but a lie can cause more damage in a relationship once it has been figured out. People believe that by just lying, a problem is solved, but problems start when lies are told. Lying destroys relationships and truth builds honest relationships which, can last forever. In both F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby and Rob Marshall’s Chicago, characters lie because they feel that it is easier. However, lying leads to a downward- spiral. The society we live in can either lead us to a complicated relationship with the truth or easygoing. The problem with constantly telling lies is that it starts off with one, then leads to another until everything you say is a lie. Being truthful
Stephanie Ericsson’s The Ways We Lie, analyzes and reflects on how lying has simply become the norm in our society. We all lie, there is not one person in the world that does not lie. Most people lie because they are afraid of telling the truth, however what they do not know is telling a lie can lead them in the wrong direction because many things can happen when lying to a person. The person can find out when everything unravels that person will not have trust in you and you would be known as a liar. To every action there is a consequence, so why not deal with just one consequence when telling the
White lies are defined as diplomatic or well-intentioned deception. There are many different types of white lies that are told, such as, lies of flattery for example; if someone gives another person a gift and the gift was not what the person wanted, this person would reply “thank you so much! I just love it!” This type of white lie is told because telling someone that their gift was undesirable would make the teller look like an inconsiderate being.
Therefore with this I believe that lying it not as bad as we have been told, we as human being we were not created perfect , we were created to make mistakes to learn from them , to make the best of them . We will fall and then we will rise with pride to become a better person
To begin, sometimes it is better to lie rather than telling the truth and hurting someone’s feelings. It is not wrong when you tell a little white lie to keep someone you care about from getting hurt. To be specific, if your friend asked you how you feel about her hair, and you do not like it, you would not want to tell her that. Instead of telling the truth, and hurting her fragile feelings, you would rather say a little lie, telling her that you love it. If you are lying to keep someone you care about from getting their feelings hurt, or their pride wounded, then what is the harm? In conclusion, there is nothing wrong with telling small lies, if you are doing it with someone’s best interest in mind.