What Family Is To Me
Since birth, I have grown up with a different concept of family than
most people do. Instead of being born into my biological family, I was adopted
into my given family. I have known I was adopted, for as long as I can remember
because my parents made sure to tell me so, at the earliest age that I could
understand. By adopting me and my sister into the family, my parents showed
that family means love, respect and sacrifice. My adoption gave me a family to
belong to and be loved by.
Love is the first part in any family. I can be defined in more ways
than one. Family love is the strongest type because it is unconditional. This
unconditional love means that no matter what happens my family will still love
me. They have shown this love for twenty years now. And after all the things I
have done wrong, or done badly, my family still shows this unconditional love to
me and to each other.
The second part in a family is respect and trust. Trust is something
that can take years to build, but can be broken very easily. By breaking trust
with a family member one is also breaking respect of the family. The two ideas
go hand in hand. My parents respected me enough to tell me that I was adopted,
instead of lying to me and having me find out later in life that I wasn't their
biological son. This respect that my parents gave me, in turn gave me their
trust. And I gave them the respect and trust that was given to me.
Without sacrifice, a family cannot be. The sacrifices that family
members make for each other show the willingness to be an unselfish part of a
family. Sacrifices also display the love, respect and trust in a family. I
know that even though some of the time it may not seem that my parents would
sacrifice anything for me, I realize that they would do anything for and
everything for me and that I would do the same for them.
...he way love is performed and the price a family member might have to pay for the sake of the integrity of one’s family, at the end of the day, family will always be the people who loves us the most.
I have always known that I was adopted. There was never one day when I realized that my parents were not biologically related to me. Being adopted has always been a part of me, ever since early childhood. Almost every year, in my elementary school classes, I had to create a project in which I had to describe myself. Sometimes I would have to use objects or pictures, at other times I would have to write an essay or poem. Every single time I completed a variation of that assignment, I included the same three facts about myself: I like to dance, I enjoy going to the beach, and I am adopted. I remember being so proud to
Beckett, Celia, Jenny Castle, Christine Sonuga-Barke, Colvert Edmund, and Stevens Jana. "The experience of adoption: a study of intercountry and domestic adoption from the child's point of view. Adoption and Fostering.
Back in the day when I was very little, I remember that my dad used to take care of me. He would never let me run around the house when glass could off break and hurt me. As I kept growing up my father started to give more freedom but also gave me more responsibilities; like he wanted me to do the chores of the house, not all of them but some. I knew they were not mine to do but I still help. When I went off to college and I had to do all by myself, I realize that my father did good on making me do my laundry, chores and etc., when I was young. Besides I knew that I had to do my chores for me to go out with friends. Although I had this kind of responsibilities at a young age I can say that it helped in life. But because some parents overprotective their children and they are not exposing to real life, children might not know how to function in society when their parents die.
Deep down inside, I have always known my parents are loving parents that will do anything they can to support me to prosper and succeed in life. The only problem is that my parents came from very traditional household that used the authoritarian parenting style, so that is the style they used on me. While growing up with parents using the authoritarian parenting style, I was not exposed to their warmth or nurturing side. Instead, I was taught to respect authority and traditional structure in a demanding, controlling and punitive way. This affected me in a negative way as I was expected to follow strict rules unconditionally with absolute obedience, and my parents rarely gave me choices or options as they had very high expectations of what I should be doing. For example, when I was in junior high, my parents selected all of my courses and I had no control over my school schedule. They told me that they were doing this because they knew what was good for me and what career path I should be going into in the future. However, what they did not understand at that time is that their actions lowered my self-esteem and prevented me to act independently; as a result, I never really learned how to set my own limits and personal standards until I entered my sophomore year in high school.
One does not always have to be biologically related to someone to be loved and taken care of. In adoption, this is normally the case. A child who is put up for adoption can be adopted by a family and be shown the same amount of love and care as if they were that family’s own. There are places everywhere that allow adoption, which means there are children who are being shown affection they would not have seen otherwise. While many have differentiated views, adoption is globally a great thing for the countless kids in need of a loving home.
Societal attitudes toward adoption have made great advances since the 1900s, both in the understanding of the complexities of adoption and the acceptance of adoption as a positive path for children.
Adoption has been proven to be a motivator for children countless times. Adoption has miniscule, if any, health impacts on children. A study from Bethany Christian Services shows that health is not an issue. “Most children who are adopted lead healthy, normal lives” (Bethany Christian Services 1). The importance in this statement is the fact that adoption does not affect the health of the adopted child, at least majority of the time. Adoptees make up two percent of the world’s population. Out of that two percent, “5 percent of children are receiving outpatient mental health services, 10 to 15 percent of children are in residential treatment, and 6 to 9 percent of children who have learning disorders in the United States” (Bethany Christian Services 1). Furthermore, adoption shows signs of low self-esteem in the most rarity of cases. The Minnesota/Texas Adoption Research Project conducted studies to display the correlation in openness of adoption. “In the first wave of research when the children were between the ages of 4 and 12 with two thirds between ages 5.5 and 8.5 years the researchers have found there was no relationship found between adoption openness and self-esteem, either positively or negatively. Taking this new found intelligence in consideration, it can be concluded that overall, adoption hinders the health of children only in minority cases, and the...
...edical history and I was able to have a relationship with my family and not have the added stress of not knowing where I come from. I did not experience any disadvantages from being adopted however, when I looked at the stages one goes through as they get older I can apply them to my life. I feel I may have skipped some stages , but I did question why my mother could not get off the drugs to be able to take care of me and my siblings, however I know it’s not personal because she did not raise any of my siblings. Adoption is something that one is fortune to be loved and to be picked by a family, however I think it is important to be aware of the physical, cognitive and emotional aspects of adopting someone. Overall, I know that I will encounter and adopted student and to be able to have a teacher who was adopted will only help me build a relationship with that child.
No one knows what it feels like to be someone that is adopted other than people who are. People who are adopted usually have an emotional impact as well as psychological effects because of being adopted. It took longer for me to find my own identity, and to develop what my identity is today even though I am still not 100% sure who I am. I also obtain a great amount of guilt or feeling lonely at some port in time. There are many times where I have felt unwanted or in some cases abandoned. This could mean the smallest impacts on my life such as a friend leaving or not wanting to hang out. A breakup can also be something that will impact me more than others could because of that feeling of abandonment. Though it is hard on myself it is also hard on the peop...
Adoption has changed many lives for the better, including my own. By being adopted, it has allowed me to experience what it is like to live in a world of endless possibilities. It has taught me to be open to different cultures and how to adapt to a new society. Adoption is not just taking legal responsibility of a child; it’s a lifelong journey that guarantees the betterment of the next generation.
To begin, what led up to my adoption. This was very difficult part of my life, which began when my mom and my dad split up. They broke up when I was very little and my mom met a guy that I really did not like. He was a major alcoholic and always beat my mom, brother and I. There have been times that we tried to get away but he would seem to always find us. This was when finally my brother and I ran away and which caused us to
National coordinator of National Adoptee Rights Day, founder of Voices of Adoption, and an adopted adult, Denise K. Castellucci argues that “adoption should never ask any human being to trade their…right to know the true facts of one’s own birth in return for a promise of a stable and loving home” (Ca...
trust. Growing up, they always reminded me that I was a reflection of them and that statement has