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Freshman seminar
Wellness paper

101 Ways of doing It With Out Actually doing it
This program totally wasn’t what I expected it to be. To my surprise the whole thing was actually about relationships, and what to do on dates without having sex, and or sexual influence.

      Attending college is a very different experience. It’s when most of us experience life situations and learn to make our own decisions. The problem is that many students, due to the influence of our society, decide to have sex because “everybody else is doing it”. But what many students don’t realize is that there both rewards and consequences when dealing with sexual intercourse. This is an important issue, especially when most of my fellow peers believe in “casual sex”. I personally believe that sex is something that shouldn’t be taking lightly…in other words, I’m not anybody’s booty call!!!!

     Anyways, back to the seminar. In the discussion, many of us realized that dates seem to be a thing of the past. No one really goes on a “one on one” date anymore. Its always a group thing, going out to a party or just hanging out. I can’t even remember if I’ve ever been on a real date myself. Relationships lack that solid foundation of one to one communication, which is probably why most teens have sex: it’s what’s expected, yet nobody talks about it.
     During the seminar, we were educated in finding other ways to express ourselves and feelings to each other. Even though some were far-fetched and unrealistic (for example: a grave yard walk), some were actually feasible (example: a picnic). A few of the other suggestions included a K-mart party, which I personally would’ve evr thought of, but I guess it is another alternative to sex. Some of the more realistic ones included walks on the beach, athletic activities, dinner and a movie. Hopefully some of these ideas will be used around campus instead of sex. Many attending the meeting suggested other dating ideas such as horseback riding, test driving cars and playing golf. I didn’t quite agree with them because a.) horses are big animals b.) I don’t have a license and c.) I HATE golf!!!!

Also during the seminar, we participated in an activity. We were split into groups, based on gender. The girls that attended the seminar wrote down some of the things they like to do and some of the things they hate, the boys in the room did the same.

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"Wellness." 123HelpMe.com. 21 Jun 2018
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When we compared each other’s answers we found that we do not have that many differences. There were some misunderstandings, but we all generally wanted the same things. The guy’s ideal date was very similar to the girls; good conversation topped with a little romance. At the same time, stereotypes we cleared up; all guys don’t think only about sex. But like anything in life, there’s conflict: both the girls and the guys got into heated arguments about each other’s actions towards one another. The girls said that they hate it when a guy slap their ass, while the guys said that they hated it when girls get mad and decide to stop talking. Among the top ten things girls and guys hate about each other were: 1.) That all we really think about is sex, but we try to deny it, because we were always thought that t was wrong, and bad. 2.) We all want some attention. 3.) When guys brought there girls with them to ‘hang out” wither there buddies and are never formally introduced, so they feel awkward. 4.) Those guys also never listen to what girls say, even though we know that we are whiney, we just want you to show that you care.... But in the end guys would rebuttal saying they actually do care and pay attention to what girls have to say. Eventually, both agreed to work on those problems after yelling for a good five or ten minutes.

No matter what anybody says, the girls won in this seminar. They made valid points on what is totally disrespectful on the guys part. I did learn more then I expected to from this. Girls and the guys both had valid arguing gounds. It s just that we never really have a time and or place to discuss the things that bother us, so we just go with the flow. Most relationships could improve if some of these methods were used. This seminar hopefully helped many students realize that a healthy relationship needs understanding on both parts, and that sex isn’t always the intention of some people.

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