To Wed or not to Wed
The question of what creates happiness for an individual is one that is commonly brought up. It is with no doubt that a large portion of one’s happiness can stem from human interaction. Friendships, relationships, and love can create a sense of self worth and value. Though all these things are critical to one’s happiness, how crucial is it to one’s well being that as humans we have life partners? Can being single and not having to worry about anyone but ones self bring about a larger amount of happiness, or is being in a committed relationship and married something that can satisfy one to feel that they have reached complete and total happiness? According to research mentioned in Derek Bok’s book “The Politics of Happiness” marriage alone is a large contributor to an increase in one’s well being. A study also reviewed in Bok’s book shows that while twenty six percent of people that have never been married consider themselves very happy. An even larger amount, around 42 percent, of married individuals also considered themselves very happy (Bok 139). Does this prove that people who are married are indeed happier?
Within our Western society marital status is often categorized into two definite groups. One obviously being married, and the other which often has much ambiguity surrounding it, is single. We are brought into this world as single; we do not have a spouse or partner. The first relationship that we experience as humans is being single (Thornton 77). Recent research has been showing that being single is very beneficial to one’s well-being including their health. According to a website based around healthy living, being single has its health benefits. As a single individual one is less likely to gain w...
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... to each individual. If one finds his self or her self far happier with less responsibilities and enjoys the freedom that comes with being single than it is their right to remain single and happy. If one enjoys the security and stableness of marriage than it is their right to be married. One can also live the single life for as long as they would like, and then decide to marry. While at the same time those who are married can decide to get a divorce and revert back to being single. Whatever creates the most happiness in one’s life is what they should pursue. Ultimately this question is up to the individual and what they prefer. This question is one that is very multifaceted and has a lot of complexities surrounding it. There are valuable insights to each point of view of which will make one happier and it is up to that individual to find what works best for them.
“what have we learned.” To prevent any kind of confusion, Waldinger divides what he has learned from this study into three lessons. He reinforces the big value of relations with some metaphors: “the experience of loneliness turns out to be toxic.” He wants to convey how threatening the loneliness is. “loneliness kills.” To stop any doubt that his metaphor is exaggerated, he supports it with evidences, facts and detailed surveys: “more than one in five Americans will report that they're lonely,” “The people who were the most satisfied in their relationships at age 50 were the healthiest at age 80.” These surveys and facts mainly support not only his point but also his aim beyond that talk. The power of relationships: “good relationships keep us happier and healthier.” He also illustrates the previous point by reports from the study: “Our most happily partnered men and women reported, in their 80s, that on the days when they had more physical pain, their mood stayed just as happy. But the people who were in unhappy relationships, on the days when they reported more physical pain, it was magnified by more emotional pain.” Additionally, he illustrates how the relationships can keep us healthier: “High-conflict marriages, for example, without much affection, turn out to be very bad for our health, perhaps worse than getting divorced. And living in the midst of good, warm relationships is protective.” Waldinger develops that the relationships do not just protect physical health, they protect brains: “the people who are in relationships where they really feel they can count on the other person in times of need, those people's memories stay sharper longer. And the people in relationships where they feel they really can't count on the other one, those are the people who experience earlier memory
Marriage is the legal or formally recognized union of a man and a woman, or two people or the same sex as partners in a relationship. Marriage rates in the United States have changed drastically since the last 90’s and early 2000 years (Cherlin 2004). Marital decline perspective and marital resilience perspective are the two primary perspectives and which we believe are the results from the decline. The marital decline perspective is the view that the American culture has become increasingly individualistic and preoccupied with personal happiness (Amato, 2004). The change in attitudes has changed the meaning of marriage as a whole, from a formal institution
Human beings are not isolated individuals. We do not wander through a landscape of trees and dunes alone, reveling in our own thoughts. Rather, we need relationships with other human beings to give us a sense of support and guidance. We are social beings, who need talk and company almost as much as we need food and sleep. We need others so much, that we have developed a custom that will insure company: marriage. Marriage assures each of us of company and association, even if it is not always positive and helpful. Unfortunately, the great majority of marriages are not paragons of support. Instead, they hold danger and barbs for both members. Only the best marriages improve both partners. So when we look at all three of Janie’s marriages, only her marriage to Teacake shows the support, guidance, and love.
More Americans are getting divorced at an astonishing rate, according to the McKinley Irvin Family Law, there are about 16,800 divorces per week. This phenomenon has triggered a general panic among young adults. Therefore, animated by their fear of getting divorced, young adults have elaborated a new solution to avoid divorce which is cohabitation. They see cohabitation as a test to avoid divorce. However, does cohabitation really work? Meg Jay in her text entitled “The Downside of Living Together” defends the idea that seeing cohabitation as a preventive way to avoid divorce leads to increase the chance of divorce. I believe that cohabitation
Is marriage really important? There is a lot of controversy over marriage and whether it is eminent. Some people believe it is and some people believe it is not. These opposing opinions cause this controversy. “On Not Saying ‘I do’” by Dorian Solot explains that marriage is not needed to sustain a relationship or a necessity to keep it healthy and happy. Solot believes that when a couple gets married things change. In “For Better, For Worse”, Stephanie Coontz expresses that marriage is not what is traditional in society because it has changed and is no longer considered as a dictator for people’s lives. The differences between these two essays are the author’s writing style and ideas.
The textbook in chapter four explains chronic diseases such as obesity, cardiovascular disease, diabetes II, hypertension, and osteoporosis are often primary factors contributing to the deliberating effects of old age and the need for formal care. The single lifestyle can contribute to these afflictions. Caring.com contributing editor, Paula Spencer Scott, states in her article,” 7 Top Health Risks for Men Over 40”, “Unmarried men generally have poorer health habits, too -- they drink more, eat worse, get less medical care, and engage in more risky behaviors (think drugs and promiscuous sex).” (Scott, 2007-2015). Thus, it makes sense that by altering one’s lifestyle, it can aid in the prevention of these chronic diseases, and prolong the need of formal care. Regular health screenings provide
The sanction of marriage in our society is something that is still strived for and valued. Most people still crave the idea of intimacy with commitment, finding a soul mate is highly romanticized in the media and our society. According to Berkman and Glass (2000), people who lacked close ties with others were two to three times as likely to die over a 9 year span and individuals who were married in the USA were less likely to die from any of the top ten cancers than unmarried people. These studies show us that not only is it in our nature to seek out intimate relationships with others, but there are many benefits that we receive in return. Yet with all of these benefits and people who are still attempting to seek out healthy marriages, we still see almost one half of all marriages ending in divorce (Cherlin, 2010) and fewer people getting married than ever before (Cherlin, 2009).
A husband and wife do not appear to be a choice that means ?forever? anymore. When a person plans to marry, it should be when they are ready to start a family and begin acting responsibly. All marriages have their ups and downs, and we are prone to argue; but we need to let love conquer hate, not the other way around. The divorce rate is too high and it affects everybody. There should be no reason for a person to give up their marriage for selfish reasons. Arguments between husband and wife occur, of course; but when something is wrong, it should be worked-out peacefully. The meaning of a divorce is betrayal; it?s unfair and the cruelest situation to put your ?loved? one through. For instance, if a man wants to divorce his wife aft...
Single life is like migratory birds without the trouble or restrictions, it makes things sometimes easier to travel and be anywhere they want to be. Single people are selfish at times, by forcing to think about themselves only, and spending money as they would like. Usually, problems affect one person instead more than one. On the other hand, there are many advantages of getting married. First, United States has an income tax system that combines tax liability of married people. People could get some tax benefit, sometimes with higher or lower tax burden if they had remained single. Second, marriage helps the rich person to keep their wealth to be protected after they die. That dead person can leave an amount to their spouse without creating tax, until the spouse
Is Monogamy the Best Form of Marriage? In the United States, marriage is a commitment two people make for the rest of their lives. The average American marriage lasts seven years. Well over half of all marriages end in divorce (Francouer, 72). Statistics on the infidelity have risen fifty percent since the 1970s and is rising all the time.
Inside the article “Why Marriage is Good for You”, Maggie Gallagher makes claims that marriage improves many facets of an individual’s life; including both mental and physical health, longevity, finances, and reduced chances of infidelity (Gallagher). The statements made throughout the article reference many statistics and studies conducted by various organizations and individuals, however, Gallagher falls victim to a number of common logical fallacies. While this weakens Gallagher’s argument in the article, it does not necessarily make it false.
A happy relationship is based on realistic expectations? Real relationships take effort, time and commitment. A happy relationships doesn’t just happen because two people love each very much, but because they also value one another and are willing to make an investment of time and energy into building a happy relationship day after day. Throughout time, people have constantly attempted to seek happiness through relationships. In “The Diamond as Big as the Ritz” by F. Scott Fitzgerald and “The Story of an Hour” by Kate Chopin shows how happiness in relationship can be found in different ways. I think you can find happiness in freedom. Happiness is being free to do the things you want to do and to let go of fears and the judgments that other people might have and that’s how some people can find happiness in relationships.
In a 2010 study, researchers Scott R. Braithwaite, Raquel Delevi, and Frank D. Fincham, surveyed 1,621 single and non-single college students, analyzing various mental issues like depression, anxiety, alcohol use, failing courses, stress, and disorders. Interestingly, students in committed relationships scored lower, indicating less mental health issues. Logically, it is easy to notice that the one thing the single participants lacked was a reliable partner to consistently support them. Though it is likely that single participants could still have other forms of relationships, those relationships lack the same type of unity and intimacy developed within romantic ones. The process of attaining this unity and intimacy builds a better understanding for each other, which can then result in a deeper level of support. Another form of understanding and deeper level of support and unity can be acquired through the exciting and intimate experiences of sexual intercourse. In fact, “when couples had intercourse, women had orgasms about 28% of the time in first-time hook ups but over 60% of the time in relationships...The analogous percentages for men are 52% and 89% ” (England 569). With this, it is clear that couples can better learn to understand each other’s needs to create a pleasurable experience. As two individuals become increasingly close and build a foundation of deep understanding in a romantic relationship, it is evident that the mutual support and care for one another alleviates stress, depression, and loneliness. Thus, those who have someone to count on and understand them have a better state of mind and are more healthy mentally. More importantly, the different effects on mental aspects within relationships help illustrate a sense of collaboration and happiness as opposed to how stigmas initially depict a sense of
Getting married is the most important event in our life. From time to time, they always say, “Single life is a sweet dream and marriage is an alarm clock.” This proverb could make young people afraid when deciding whether or not they marry. However, there are differences that indicate pros and cons of both single life and married life. In general, single life can bring us freedom to experience life all by ourselves; at the same time, it also brings loneliness and detachment. In contrast, married life can fulfill us with love, care, and a sense of belonging; however, it also requires us a great deal of shared responsibilities. Understanding the differences between single life and married life especially on finance, emotion, and responsibility
The debate on whether to get married or stay single has been raging for a long while, with both sides of the coin having their own pros and cons regarding the matter. Many proponents of either marriage or single life have strong individual convictions, and it is difficult to reach a definitive objective conclusion. Is the married individual happier than his/her single counterpart, or is getting married just a comfort seeking ritual that people believe they have to fulfill at some point in their lives? It is necessary to dissect this issue in the light of four factors: health and other medical factors, the economic and finance front, mental and emotional wellbeing and lastly, the social factor.