tall tail

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Albert the Man for Freedom
A Tall Tale by Robert Dennett It was 1954. He came into town on an iron horse whose mouth smoked with black steam. That’s because his iron horse was a Chevy Vega, a pink one at that! Albert went to the local saloon. He parked his iron horse and ran up yelling for two root beers. The Chevron worker was worried that the strange man in the store that smelled of manure was here to rob him, and as a result he phoned the police. Albert continued demanding his root beers. Two cop cars showed up and the officers ran up, guns up in the air, their arms so long that the guns looked higher then the clouds. Albert yelled, “I ain’t letting them coppers take me alive.” He pulled a squirt gun from out of his pocket and fired at the officers with water colder then the North Pole. The officer arrested Albert. While Albert was in jail, a local business man came by after receiving his squirt gun. He questioned Albert about how he kept the water in his pockets cold. Albert could not say what did it but anything in his pockets turned ice cold. The business man made a deal for Albert. If he came and worked for him as a refrigerator he would pay him a dime and hour, Albert agreed. He was now known as cold pockets Albert. He lived in the business man’s apartment and stored any thing the business man wanted in his pockets. After working their for ten years, in 1964 the Governor came by. “I know you and the law have add your differences but need your help!” asked the Governor “what” asked Albert. the governor turned on the TV with the news report talking about the escalating problems in Vietnam. “What’s Leeitnam got to do with anything?” Asked Albert. “It’s pronounced Vietnam!” Said the governor. “Ok meeitnam, koreanam whate... ... middle of paper ... ...he drank root beer and not cola. Albert met the president and they had this conversation. “your a communist!” said the president “Im no dem dar commie” said Albert. “ But you drink root beer that be a commie drink and your cold pockets could also be communist!” said the president “I no I don't like cola but have you tried root beer it be an American drink!” Said Albert, “ final ill try it.” Admitted the president, Albert pulled two root beers from his paints and gave one to the President. The president took one sip and said “your right my Murican boy” Said the president and with that the president reversed his veto and Albert saved the South Africans Albert went home and decided to lay low. Not much is known of what happened to the Greatest Freedom Fighter ever, but it is known that he still is somewhere fighting for freedom, your freedom, in his pink chevy Vega

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