Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen – for those of you who don’t know me I’m Floyd, Edward’s best man. Of course, the only problem with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get a chance to prove it, but if anyone wants to start a drinking competition later, then come talk to me.
Edward has been a great friend to me since we met. And, over that time, he's always been there for me. I remember especially him being there when I had my first car crash… oh, that's right, Edward was driving!
Honestly Edward, I’m not really up here to embarrass you. You did a fine job of that yourself during your bachelor’s party (stag night). In fact, we were a little concerned when you made your cross-dressing tendencies public, that Nancy might have had some competition today. But given the formal nature of the occasion, I am pleased to see, Edward, that you've decided to copy my outfit, rather than hers.
Edward has gone through many evolutionary changes to end up the man he is today. In order to understand exactly what went wrong, let’s examine Edward’s career.
As many of you know, Edward has been climbing the ladder in sales in recent years. This comes as no surprise since he has always been able to talk his way out of anything. You know, his parents still believe that it wasn't him who flooded the kitchen. Edward's talent for being able to spin any di...
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... the surface, Edward was still a simple Somerset boy at heart. ‘She’s different to us’ he informed me. ‘What do you mean?’ I enquired. ‘Well, put it this way,’ Edward replied, ‘she gets out of the bath to have a pee.’
None the less, they hit it off. And we’ve seen both of them grow over the six years of their relationship. I think their marriage is going to be a wonderful partnership – and Edward will be the silent one.
Truthfully, I can’t think of two other people that are better suited to spending the rest of their lives together!
Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure, not to mention relief, to ask you all to raise a toast to the newly weds.
Congratulations to the bride and groom.
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