Companionship in Sula
Humans need to be with other humans. They need the companionship and they need to know that other people care. Most of the time, this companionship that humans seek with each other will evolve into friendship. At other times, the companionships will evolve into love. Differentiating between friendship and love is difficult because there are no clear cut boundaries on either side. What one person might feel as love, the other might distinguish as friendship or vice versa. The differentiation between love and friendship can be so difficult that not even the people involved in the relationship could realize it. The people involved would only believe that their relationship was simply friendship, not realizing that they are in fact in love. This idea has been explored in countless movies, music, and books. One such book where this idea was explored is Sula. In the novel, Sula Peace and Nel Wright maintain a close-knit friendship, so close that the reader can infer that line between friendship and love has been blurred, but Sula and Nel do not realize it.
The first instance of homosexual undertones arise when the narrator is discussing their childhood. "Their meeting was fortunate, for it let them use each other to grow on… they found in each other's eyes the intimacy they were looking for." (52) This quote from the novel embodies the ideal relationship. People explore serious relationships (such as love and marriage) with each other because they are searching for intimacy. Even as children, they knew that they found within each other something that they thought they might not be able to find anywhere else. They needed each other to grow, much like how two people in a serious relationship will grow ...
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... was for sure that they would be married.
Everything in the novel seems to lead up to their relationship with each other, and how integral it is for them to have each other in their lives. The mental connection that the two of them shared surpassed that of Jude's and Nel's, and even with Sula seeing so much more of the world than Nel has, she never found a man that could fill that void for her. A key point of that is that she explicitly says that she was never able to find a man able to make her feel the way that Nel made her feel. It's extremely possible, that by exploring this relationship between them, Nel and Sula would have ended up much happier than anyone could have ever perceived. Only by exploring the boundaries between friendship and love, can the boundaries ever be drawn. If these boundaries are never drawn, then true happiness can never really be found.
The symbiotic relationship between Sula and Nel began during their childhood. “Their meeting was fortunate, for it let them use each other to grow on” (1011). Sula and Nel's friendship "was as intense as it was sudden" (1012). “They found relief in each other's personality" (1012). Sula looked to Nel for sturdiness and comfort. Nel enjoyed Sula’s unpredictable nature and outspokenness. One found comfort in what the other found bothersome. They had an unbreakable bond and an inconceivable loyalty to one another. When Sula accidentally killed Chicken Little; Nel stuck by her side. “Although she knew she had “done nothing”, she felt convicted” (1017). At Chicken Little's funeral, "They held hands and knew that only the coffin would lie in the earth; the bubbly laughter and
...was sick and dying, but because she needed to know and understand for herself why Sula betrayed her in such a manner. Armed with the information that Sula was sick and may be in need of assistance since no one else in the neighborhood was willing to help her, she visited Sula for the last time. Nevertheless, Sula had not changed, she still considered herself to be above reproach for whatever deeds she committed. Nel finally understood her friend for who she really was and realized that even though she did not like some of her way, she liked the good parts of her enough to forgive the bad. She is finally able to not only cross the chasm that was created in their friendship by Sula’s betrayal but she realized how much she really loved her as a friend, albeit a little too late since Sula was already dead. All in all Sula was a mean self-centered person whose only emotional outlet was in the person of her best friend Nel. They compliment each other in many ways and paint a myriad picture of what true friendship is all about. In friendship, one has to take the good with the bad, and the thick with the thin, and Sula and Nel were the best of friends in that respect.
Where many novels focus on the men and how they are the dominant figure in the society, Sula has the entire focus on the women, with men coming in only as sexual objects. Throughout the novel, the two main girls did not have male figures in their lives. Nel had a father but he was often away on trips, leaving her mother to raise her. Sula did not even have a father. The men she saw in the house were often there to have sex with her mother, Hannah, or exchange in flirtatious conversation with her grandmother, Eva. The man in this story is not the type to stay with his wife or to be faithful. Sula’s grandfather left, her father died, Nel’s father is never around. Hannah often slept with recently married men, and Sula sleeps with Nel’s husband, Jude, causing him to leave
Sula’s need for love was first expressed in the beginning of the novel when she is twelve years old. Not realizing that Sula is nearby, Hannah, her mother says: “I love Sula. I just don’t like her.” Sula “only heard Hannah’s words, and the pronouncement sent her flying up the stairs. In bewilderment, she stood at the window fingering the curtain edge, aware of a sting in her eye.”(57) Sula did not show that her mother’s words truly hurt her. She ran away from the problem when she heard Nel call for her. Sula just went on to continue playing with Nel like nothing happened even thought the words of her mother would ring in her head forever reminding her of the hurt and betrayal she felt when those words left her mother’s lips.
Everything in this world has a balance. Without negative, there is no positive and without Sula, there is not Nel. Their friendship is strong and they are one when together, and become nothing when broken apart. Nel turns into a dull housewife, living the life of her mother, and Sula dies alone without anyone who truly loves her by her side.
Nel is able to express her feelings and emotions when she is with Sula, which is good because she can’t do that at home because she has to be the obedient one. They understand each other completely, they never argue or compete with each other. Their relationship is invaluable; they met each other at the time where they both needed it the most. Their friendship is not dependent on obligation, compassion, or love, but on their conjuction of sameness and autonomy. At this point they are together because they want to, not because they have to or need to be. When Sula and Nel meet it’s the time when they realize that their spot in society is disadvantage, “because each had discovered years before that they were neither white nor male, and that all freedom and triumph was forbidden to them, they had set about creating something else to be” (Morrison, 50). They are best friends mainly because they grew up in the same neighborhood, they are the same race, gender, and age. They understand the needs of each other and each other’s problems. They experience the intimacy they were looking for in each
The personalities of Nel and Sula form as a result of their childhood family atmosphere. Sula's unusual exorbitance results from an eccentric upbringing that openly accepts and welcomes transience. The narrator describes Sula's house as a "throbbing disorder constantly awry with things, people, voices and the slamming of doors . . ." (52), which suggests a family accustomed to spontaneous disruptions and fleeting alliances. Sula decides that "sex is pleasant and frequent, but otherwise insignificant." (44) Sula grows up in the atmosphere of an emotional separation between mothers and daughters in her family. The mothers provide only the physical maternal support but lack in the emotional attachment to their children. Sula overhears her mother, Hannah, say, "I love her [Sula]. I just don't like her, that's the thing." (57) Hannah's words act as a determiner of Sula's defiance. Hannah and Eva, her mother, are also alienated. "Under Eva's distant eye, and prey to her idiosyncrasies, her own children grew up steadily." (41) This dissatisfaction causes Hannah to ask Eva, "Did you ever love us?" (67) "I know you fed us and all. I was talking 'bout something else. Did you ever, you know play with us?" (68) Eva leaps out of the window to "cover her daughter's body with her own" (75) to save her from a fire; she raises her children single-handedly and even sacrifices her leg to get an insurance because she does not have enough money to feed her children. Proud of keeping her children alive through the roughest times, Eva does not re...
Robert Nozick’s Love’s Bond is a clear summary of components, goals, challenges, and limitations of romantic love. Nozick gives a description of love as having your wellbeing linked with that of someone and something you love. I agree with ideas that Nozick has explained concerning the definition of love, but individuals have their meaning of love. Every individual has a remarkable thing that will bring happiness and contentment in their lives. While sometimes it is hard to practice unconditional love, couples should love unconditionally because it is a true love that is more than infatuation and overcomes minor character flaw.
The friendship between Nel and Sula features two girls with different personalities that when combined bring to the relationship what the other lacks. Nel is the calm and controlled side which possesses maturity that Sula lacks. Sula is the wild and adventurous one that can also easily be scared. Each girl lends a characteristic that the other does not have which creates one identity between the two.
The relationship between Nel and Sula begins during their adolescent years. Though they are complete opposites, they seem to work well with each other, depending on one another for comfort and support. The two spend almost all of their time together, learning from one another and growing as a result. They take solace in the presence of one another, finding comfort in what the other finds bothersome and using the lifestyle of the one another to compensate for their shortcomings. When Sula first visits Nel's home, "Nel, who regarded the oppressive neatness of her home with dread, felt comf...
The symbiotic nature between Sula and Nel began during their adolescent years. Sula depended upon Nel for sturdiness and comfort, while Nel preferred the unpredictable nature of her counterpart. They used the other's lifestyle to compensate for their shortcomings by placing themselves in the other's surroundings. When Sula visited Nel's home, "Nel, who regarded the oppressive neatness with dread, felt comfortable in it, with Sula" (Morrison 29). In the same way, Sula found comfort within the walls of the Wright home. They took solace in each other's presence. Each one finds comfort i...
Love is affection, devotion, passion, desire, warmth, respect or loyalty. You choose. It doesn't really matter which one because they are all forms of love. Some are powerful and demand attention while others are more subtle and just below the surface. In recent years, love has drifted from these subtle levels to the more noticeable ones, namely passion. In my opinion, our society downplays the real necessity for genuine affection. By this I mean that we, as a society, spend so much time focusing on only one level of love (passion) that we tend to neglect and not recognize the need for closeness and trust (friendship). Love is an all-encompassing emotion that can be powerful and demanding, but also rewarding and pleasurable.
First there is the presence of the old stereotypical woman character, a woman split between the conventional and nontraditional roles of women. No differences are apparent initially between Morrison's Sula and any other women's literature in the past. Women are depicted either as docile servants to men, like Nel, or ball-busting feminist monsters like Sula. The hidden aspect of the novel lies underneath these stereotypical surface roles, in the incomprehensible and almost inappropriate bond of the two women. In the final scene of Sula, Nel comes to the realization that the emptiness inside her is due to the loss of Sula, not Jude (Morrison 174). Her friendship with Sula is all that matters.
What is love? This question has probably been asked or thought about since the beginning of time. The definition of love cannot be defined as something concrete but something that is infinite. It is something that can evolve to everyone's personality and something that everyone can choose to create for him or her. The idea of love can change as the seasons change throughout the year. But for some, finding love is not an easy path and the search for love can become a façade to cover their true identity. In Giovanni's Room by James Baldwin, the main character seems to be confused about his life and more importantly about love. He not only struggles to find his sexuality but he uses the notion of love to fill the void in his life at any given time. David becomes so enveloped by his desires, wants, dreams, and idea of manhood that he cannot truly find what love means to him.
Poets and philosophers for centuries have been trying to answer the question, what is love? Love has an infinite number of definitions, which vary from one person to another. Love cannot be measured by any physical means. One may never know what true love is until love it- self has been experienced. What is love? A four letter word that causes a person to behave in a way that is out of character. What is love? A first kiss, childhood crushes on a teacher or friend’s mom. What is love? A choice that people make by putting their partner’s wishes, desires and needs above everything else. What is love? The act of forgiveness, the infatuation with someone, the communication between two people. What is love? A friendship that turned into a lifelong commitment, that special someone who has vowed to spend the rest of their lives to honor and protect, to love each other “till death do you part.” When in love nothing else in the world matters. According to the online Encarta Dictionary love is the passionate feeling of romantic and sexual desire and longing for somebody. Poets and philosophers may never know what love really is, and we may never truly understand the question what is love.