This desire to go to college was cemented in my mind from a very young age, and when I started applying to schools, I can’t describe how excited I was. I couldn’t apply to hundreds of places, like I thought I would, because of the application fees that I was unaware of; however, I still got to apply to private schools that I dreamed of after watching Rory Gilmore go to Yale. While I didn’t apply to Yale, I was overjoyed to get accepted to Drake University, and upon a campus tour, I was in love. It wasn’t until my “financial aid” package came in that I realized my dream to go there was just that: a dream. I was putting myself through school, and if I went to Drake, I would have around $20,000 in loans annually. I tried to tell myself (and my parents) that the scholarships could increase by my sophomore year, and I would fight my hardest to become a Resident Assistant to decrease the cost of attendance, but there was no avail. After getting the financial aid letter, my dream was dead on arrival. So my mom forced me to visit the University of Northern Iowa in March, and I was reluctant, but I fell in love on my tour. It wasn’t until the next morning that I realized I had missed the deadline for the scholarship application, and I was devastated because I realized that I would be thousands of dollars in debt no matter where I went, it was just a matter of the lesser evil-so I reluctantly ...
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I began to go through the motions in my classes and my friendships. I have battled depression since high school, but I cannot remember a time it was more debilitating. After awhile, my mind’s way to fight the stress and fear that followed me to college was to feed off of severe anxiety and obsessive tendencies.
So, in a way, I used that to fuel me. I became “obsessed” with figuring out college as best I could. I read all the brochures and handouts from Gilchrist, viewed every webpage I could to find the answers to my many questions. And because of this, I could tell someone where nearly any resource is, and more than that, I can help them through the struggle that the first year of college can be, which is why I am so happy to be a Resident Assistant this year, where I can help guide a hall of girls through the rollercoaster of their freshman year of college.
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