In her essay, “Motherhood: Who Needs It?”, Betty Rollin emphasizes the pressures of motherhood that society puts on women and highlights the fact that becoming a mother is not a natural instinct. “Women don’t need to be mothers any more than they need spaghetti,” psychiatrist Dr. Richard Rabkin stated, “But if you’re in a world where everyone is eating spaghetti, thinking they need it and want it, you will think so too.”
No person has an instinct to be a mother. We are constantly hearing the phrase ‘instinct’ and associating it with motherhood. However, this ‘instinct’ can be blamed more on the idea that all women should procreate as it was stated in the bible to “Be fruitful and multiple”. This idea further developed because before the 1880’s there were no functional contraceptives. So as Rollin so kindly put it,
…show more content…
That’s like saying if you have legs you should run track. While yes you may have the ability to run and it may present good benefits to your health, if you don’t want to, you shouldn’t feel forced. In the essay, Rollin goes on to state that “The reality of motherhood can turn women into terrible people. And judging from the 50,000 cases of child abuse in the U.S. each year, some are worse than terrible.” Not every woman is cut out to be a mother because at the end of the day, you have to be willing to put your needs on hold for the sake of your child, and not everyone is capable of doing so. She also mentions that “Women have child bearing equipment. To choose not to use the equipment is no more blocking what is indistinctive than it is for a man who, muscles or no, chooses not to be a weightlifter.” Just because women have the ability to have children does not mean every woman is required to have one. Only one person should have a say in whether or not she should have a child and that person is herself. No husband, parent, or society should pressure her to make that
It is a rare occurrence indeed to stumble upon a nonfiction article as raw and true as “The Myth of Co-Parenting: How It Was Supposed to Be. How It Was.” by Hope Edelman. The author of three nonfiction books, who has had her work published in the New York Times, the Chicago Tribune, the San Francisco Chronicle, and Seventeen magazine, writes about her expectations regarding an egalitarian marriage with equal parenting responsibilities, and compares them to the reality that comes from living in a household where both parents work full-time and cannot drop all of their responsibilities to care for a toddler. Edelman’s narrative is a flippant view on modern views of feminist relationships, from both the side of the feminist and the side of a woman whose marriage did not reflect those ideals. While she argues everyday gender roles, she may reach a deeper topic than just the sexes assigned roles of being either a nurturer or a provider, but never both. She mentions late in the article that the two
W. S. Ross once said “The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.” As simple as this quip may sound, its complex implications are amplified through the life of every person born since the beginning of humanity. What attribute makes a mother such an extraordinary influence over her young? One such attribute is the ability to nurture. Beyond the normal challenges of cooking, cleaning, schooling, singing, feeding, and changing is the motivation by which such sacrifices are made possible. One cannot raise a child without mutual respect. Emotion and anxiety must drive her instincts. Her ability to foster is only heightened by minute personal imperfections and overwhelming responsibility that lead to a lack of confidence. Yet the prevailing characteristic that separates a ‘birth giver’ from a ‘mother’ is the unconditional, undying, and at times underestimated love for her child. To be a mother in the purest sense, she must embrace this notion of nurture.
There is a woman, she will always in the softest place in your heart, you would like to spend all your life to love her; there is a love, it is Real and selfless and it will never stop, you do not need to return anything...... This man, called "mother ", this love, called" Motherhood "! “Mothers” by Anna Quindlen. I could not stop reading this essay again and again, because this essay tells exactly what I want to say when I am young. My parents leave me alone when I am 6 years old. They have to work outside of the country, during that time, transport and communication is not as convenient as now. So I can only see them once in three years. Growing up with “knowing that I have a mother and she is never around me whenever I need her”
Alison Bechdel isn’t a normal author. She uses graphics, and wordplay to tell a very engaging, and interesting story. One of these stories titled “The Ordinary Devoted Mother”, Bechdel tells the story of her trying to write a memoir about her mom. One of the major themes in this story is reading, and writing. Bechdel explores what writing is, how it is important, and how she perceives writing herself.
Throughout history, many cultures have seen women’s primary role as the reproducer and caregiver. What happens when a woman doesn’t fit this mold of dutiful wife and mother? Barbara Kingsolver analyzes this circumstance in her novel Animal Dreams through her childless and unwed protagonist in the fictional town of Grace. Kingsolver’s works tend to critique the accepted and expected roles of women in society and evaluates the previously endorsed notion that women’s worth lies in their fertility and femininity.
it is not just because a lady [¶17f] does not want to have her baby, it could be
A woman has the right to consider many options of dealing with unplanned pregnancies that may be a final burden they don’t want to take on during a time of hardship. Many women and young teens get pregnant at a time in their lives when they are still maturing and would rather terminate a pregnancy because they feel they are not ready for the added responsibility that a baby brings and want to continue getting an education with ease instead of the stresses of having to juggling on to many responsibilities all at once. “Being a single parent may interrupt careers and the ability to earn wages if complication occurs to take care of the household bills.” (Lowen, 2014). Because we live in a society that judges and places status on people some young mothers avoid becoming young single mothers of not having to deal with parental disapproval. “Lately abortions have been on the decline since the introduction of long-term contraceptives like intrauterine devices and may be also the recent recession and the economy's unpredictability.” (Eckholm, 2014). Thanks to adoption agencies instead of aborting...
The idea of bringing an unwanted baby into the world is wrong in so many ways. I personally believe having a child is an important decision that requires consideration, preparation, and planning. Having both parents to love, protect and care for the child should be the ideal way, but not having any of those would be devastating. According to “ The Colorado Department of Public Health and Environment Article , it stated that “unintended pregnancies are associated with birth defects, low birth weight , maternal depression, increased risk of child abuse ,lower educational attainment, delayed entry into prenatal care, a high risk of physical violence during pregnancy, and reduced rates of breastfeeding.” (75). As stated in the article, unintended pregnancies can become a result of many risks. I strongly agree with this statement because as I mentioned before a pregnancy requires plenty of consideration. For example, if a woman becomes pregnant and she is a drug addict, she is prone to put the drugs over the baby ,and that baby is likely to be born with some disabilities because of he or she was not taken seriously. In addition, a woman is more likely to become unemployed and therefore the woman would not be able to take care of herself or the baby. Furthermore, what about teenage girls that get pregnant
In Of Woman Born, Adrienne Rich effectively weaves her own story into a convincing account of what it means to become a mother within the bonds of patriarchal culture. Her conclusion that the institution of motherhood, which she distinguishes from motherhood, must be destroyed in order to release the creation and sustenance of life into the same realm of decision, struggle, surprise, imagination, and conscious intelligence, as any other difficult, but freely chosen work is substantiated by her courageous confession that contradicts culturally normative notions of motherhood.
Wilcox, W., & Dew, J. (2011). Motherhood and marriage: A response. Journal of Marriage and Family, 73, 29-32. doi:10.1111/j.1741-3737.2010.00786.x
“The logic of intensive mothering, particularly as it applies to middle- and upper-middle-class mothers, therefore seems to be the greatest barrier to solving the problems detailed in this book….Nearly all mothers, for instance, feel they ought to be at home with their children, ought to want to be at home with their children, and ought to be their children’s primary parent.” Pg. 201 This quote from Untangling the Mother-Nanny Knot emphasizes on the fact that these working mothers need to let go a of that temperament that they must keep the nanny, their spouse and anyone else away from their child at any cost. Because they are not able to be there for their kids they can rest their mind knowing that the person with their child when they are not present is someone that will love them and care for them no matter what, and all the working mother must do is let go just a
Women have persistently been challenged with issues regarding what it means to be a ‘good mother’. Although times continue to change, issues confronting 21st century mothers, remain similar to the ones addressed in past generations. An abundance of mothers in the 21st century are still faced with the complex issue regarding the ‘stay-at-home mom’ stereotype, in spite of the fact that the feminist movement has provided women with more rights in the present-day, then ever before. However, while strides have been made, these changes have had an affect on society’s notion of motherhood. The portrayal of motherhood is determined by countless expectations in which society has established. Such expectancies have expanded, which now effect how motherhood is depicted in different cultures. As a whole the feminist movement has strongly influenced Western Society, which has resulted in women’s suffrage, the right to make individual decisions, and has also led to wide-ranging employment for women at more equivalent wages. However, the emergence of female employment has created a war between ‘stay-at-home’ and ‘working’ mothers, which is often referred to as ‘Mommy Wars’. In addition, female employment provides men with the opportunity to stay at home and become the primary caregiver, which has ultimately had a large impact on societies notion of motherhood, treating them differently than primary caregivers of the opposite gender. This paper will examine how the feminist movement has altered societies notion of motherhood in the 21st century in comparison to past generations as a result of working mothers and stay at home fathers.
Being a mother is a lifelong job that requires copious time, energy, and money. There are myriad different reasons in which a woman would consider getting an abortion. The decision is often tragic and painful for the mother. It is one of the biggest choices a woman will make. Many people have strong beliefs about abortion, and if a mother makes a decision that they do not agree with they sometimes turn against the mother, and enkindle egregious feelings about their decision for the rest of their life. Indeed a woman may not get an abortion for selfish reasons or out of convenience, but out of a desire to protect certain important values such as her own health or a decent standard of living for the other members of the family. Additional intentions for having abortion include rape, financial difficulties, obligation by family members, or danger to the baby’s health (Roleff
Ramona T. Mercer is the theorist credited for developing the theory of Maternal Role Attainment, which is also known as the theory of Becoming a Mother. “Maternal role attainment is an interactional and developmental process occurring over time in which a mother becomes attached to her infant, acquires competence in the caretaking tasks involved in the role, and expresses pleasure and gratification in the role (Tomey & Alligood, 2006, p. 608). Mercer’s career has been primarily focused in pediatrics, obstetrics, and maternal-child nursing. Mercer’s greatest accolades have been based on her extensive research on the topic of maternal role and development (Tomey & Alligood, 2006, p. 605).
The moment a woman finds out she is pregnant, she begins to think of what kind of parent she’ll be and what if she isn’t a good parent? It is very common for a mother or father to be scared when they find out they are about to bring another human into this world. The mother has to start by eating healthy, drinking a lot of water and getting enough rest. The parenting of a child does not begin when the child is born, it begins when the mother finds out she is pregnant. Parents often make mistakes, when raising their children, that can do more harm than good in the long run.