It 's A Cold Night Essays

It 's A Cold Night Essays

Length: 979 words (2.8 double-spaced pages)

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It’s a cold night. I hear the soft crunching noises of my boots as I walk through the freshly fallen snow and up the steps. My key unlocks the door. I go inside, but I am not home. Life is strange. Most of us don’t really live in our lives, we live in our future lives. It could be in a dream, a financial plan, a child’s future, a partner, tonight’s dinner. Our perspective is towards the future, not the present. We live in the foreshadowed footprints of our future selves. It’s not wrong. Maybe it’s just part of who we are. Maybe it’s supposed to be this way.
But there are also those who live in the past. Stuck in a moment, frozen in time, securing a seat in our memories forever. It’s a place, a person, an event that evokes that feeling of nostalgia. It’s a powerful thing. It can take the smallest memory and warp it into a life changing event. It can leave a man chasing a ghost for the rest of his life. Searching for something that never existed. Searching for a figment of his own imagination.
In reality, even those who are stuck in the past are still living in the future. They still search for a way each day to rekindle their past and bring it back. Their actions are based on a belief that their future can hold what their past did, if they can just find their way back.
It’s quiet now. There are no sounds from the kitchen, the living room, her office. No sounds of idle television. No more clangs of dirty kitchen dishes or cell phone chimes. The sounds of the piano are gone, as are the sounds of her voice. The house is an empty shell. The ghost of a past life. A place where memories were born and will stay in my mind forever. Nostalgia.
I stand in the doorway to our bedroom. The bed remains, as does the furniture. Everything is a...


... middle of paper ...


...sun rises over the horizon and shines through the bedroom windows. I walk downstairs. My feet are no longer carried throughout the house by the same motivation. Before, I moved about under the thought that I would find him, or a piece him in something small, but that 's gone now. The floor feels colder than usual. I take my final turn in the centre of the living room. I’m sure I’ll be back, but it won’t be the same. I take in this final moment of a frozen life. My frozen life.
I slide my key in the door and turn to leave. A flood of memories washes over me from the last six years. My realization is bitter. It’s only when I’m faced with leaving something behind that I can see it for what it is. My present is in my past’s nostalgia, and my future, a conglomeration of handpicked moments from years gone by.
I can see things for what they are now. I can see the present.

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