Sexual Reflection Paper

Throughout this course we have discussed the importance of understanding one’s sexual philosophy with each chapter of our textbook. This is something I am in the process of navigating for myself and am continuing to build on with each positive and negative experience I have had thus far. In order to better understand where some of my sexual beliefs and values stem from, I had to look into my past to evaluate the various messages I received in regards to sex, sexuality and intimacy from the my peers and family. As I reflect on my childhood, I realized that I always knew that the act of sex existed because I saw it in some of the movies my mother watched (despite her attempts to cover my eyes or have me look away). The impression I got then

My parents reinforced these characteristics in their rules and beliefs about the way I dressed and behaved. Once I hit puberty and developed a curvier body shape, my parents became stricter with the way I dressed. I was not allowed to wear shorts or skirts that were too short or tight, I could not (even until this day) leave the house in a dress or skirt without some shorts on underneath, and I was not allowed to show cleavage. My parents, especially my mother, would slut-shame women for the way they dressed. Furthermore, my mother discouraged sexual experimentation. To her masturbation was not appropriate behavior for women and she had even warned me that if I lost my virginity or engaged in sexual acts with anyone that she would no longer support me through college. My mother would always remind me that women had more to lose for being promiscuous than men. This message was something that was reinforced through the slut shaming of girls I witnessed at school. It was acceptable for a man to hook up with many women, but for a woman it was seen as distasteful, and in some cases immoral. I was sensitive to these messages and it was not until I got to college that my views on how a woman can dress and act began to