How to Annoy Your Teacher

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Tick, tock...tick, tock. Your head slumps on the smooth wooden desk. Slowly your eyes get heavy, the room gets dark, a peaceful kind of dark. Your eyes close and your mind begins to wander. Kaleidoscope images of the lush green forest surround you. You push the dense foliage aside giving you room to step over the twisted vines and tangled tree roots. "Achem!"
You turn around slowly.
"Wake up!"
"Five more minutes, mommy."
"What did you call me?"
Uh...you wipe the drool off your desk and slowly raise your head. A bright red shade devours your cheeks and the entire class bursts into laughter. Your embarrassment fades as rage takes over. Not only did your teacher wake you up, she humiliated you in front of the entire school! It's your turn for revenge and I'm ready to teach you the art of my ways.
As the day begins your agenda is long. Showing up late is an easy way to annoy your teacher and it is even worse when you walk in the door and distract your entire class during important lessons. You must be a distraction and you must be very tardy. This is achieved by running in the classroom at least thirty minutes late screaming "oh my gosh, you would never guess what just happened" or any other exclamation followed by something to get the other students to listen to you. After getting the entire classes attention sit on a desk and create an entire posse to sit around you attentively. If desks aren't available, anything higher than the other students height to show your superiority over the teachers. Then tell meaningless stories while your teachers aggravation and irritation continues to eat at her soul,LOL! The next step in this devious plan is complaining. Begin with complaining about the teachers personal ...

... middle of paper ...

...nd you. If done correctly, this will leave your teacher with a mess and a splitting head ache. Having had so much fun annoying your teacher, you can't wait for tomorrow.
The next day you arrive at school to see a new sight greet you. Instead of being scolded for showing up late, students immediately begin to praise you. There is no teacher in sight and kids are running around the class, grinning from ear to ear. You here a kid from the back of the party turned classroom howl, "Hero! Hero! Hero!" The entire class joins in the chant. The teacher has quit and didn't give any warning or explanation to the school. A substitute won't be available for another month, a complete month of freedom! Say goodbye to those ruby red cheeks, embarrassment, confusion, your teacher won't dare to even come near you after you've followed all my steps to irritate your teacher.

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