Home Instruction Essay

Home Instruction Essay

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“Home Instruction.” Two words that seem to have become a perpetual dark cloud for me. The short phrase that never ceases to evoke the same response you would normally get from opening the Panda Express bag that you picked up ten minutes ago only to find that the ordered chicken and broccoli, of course, had miraculously transfigured into some bizarre lamb dish that was probably illegal in some states. The moment your brain realizes what happened, the very nanosecond those neurons fire, you show your dissatisfaction, whether it be with a disgruntled sigh, or a “bleh.”
THIS is how I react when I realize I’m about to start home instruction. I’m not overly angry, nor am I truly upset; I’m just annoyed. But don’t get me wrong. The fact that on most week days, when my sickness is tolerable, I have the entire morning and evening to do my work, is very much needed and appreciated. The true reason why I despise home-tutoring so much is the tutors themselves.
Over the years I’ve had the wonderful privilege of sitting down and working at my dining room table with an eclectic hodgepodge of instructors, and that’s putting it very nicely.
If home instruction is the perpetual cloud following me, then Mr. White is the bane of my existence. It has always eluded me how a man of such tall stature could exude the same presence as a kindergartner. Maybe it’s the fact that whatever shirt he’s wearing, it always has some unknown stain on it. I’ve spent many a session trying to deduce what exactly said stain is, and I have seemed to narrow it down to meatloaf. Meatloaf defines Joe White perfectly: bland.
A typical “session” with White will include me doing textbook assignments that should be homework, and him sitting there essentially balancing...


... middle of paper ...


... themselves, there is the awkward lull where the instructor packs their things up and gets ready to leave. This typically consists of me swaying uncomfortably back and forth making conversation about such inane topics like the weather, or how amusing it is that my small Yorkshire Terrier is named “Tiger”. As soon as the door shuts, I typically jump for joy knowing that I’m done for the day, and proceed to pass out on my bed.
When I talk about my situation of home schooling with my friends, the response I usually get is along the lines of, “Wow that’s awesome, you get to sleep all day and only have to work for two hours at most... I wish i could do that!”
Yes, my situation would seem pretty “awesome” to the typical high school student, yet when one takes into account all of the Mr. White’s I’ve had to deal with over the years, gruesome seems much more fitting.

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