Women are aware that men do have a best friend too, the guy in his life he just cannot let go off - his most trusted ally and confidant. A more fitting term used in Kenyan colloquial would be “his boy”. This is the unique phenomenon that is a ‘bromance’- a purely platonic relationship between 2 heterosexual males bonding over common interests and life experiences. A woman expressing her feelings was and still is the norm, but until recently this bonding between men was somewhat a taboo. Previously men, have been brought up to hide their feelings and affections with those they love, but Ruth Njihia a charted psychologist and Counselor at Oasis Africa encourages these types of relationships and believes that they “show men are improving their social skills.”
While a bromance may be healthy for him, to you ‘his boy’ is nothing more than a pesky nuisance, a third wheel whose company seems to put a damper on all your romantic efforts. Barbara, 25, tolerated a lot in her relationship with her former boo, but when her significant other’s friend went ahead and invited his brother and a friend on a special date night, she was at a loss for words. “He joined us on our Valentine’s Day dinner date. Our first Valentine’s Day together! It gets worse. He went ahead and invited his little brother and female friend.” As if this was not enough for Barbara, “Once, he stayed over for a whole week and they would hang out the whole day watching movies and go out to clubs at night. He was there at every meal. It was horrible; I could just never cuddle ...
... middle of paper ...
...our partner see and slowly learn that things are not right.” says Njihia.
Social progressions such as healthy bromances are a good thing but it’s all about creating a balance between your life and relationships.
Tips on Surving a Bromance
Instead of stewing at home while your man is bromancing, spend some time with your best friend and a group of girlfriends.
“If you can’t beat them join them”. Your partner may be trying to be considerate thinking you have nothing in common with the boys but every once in a while join them. This demonstrates your support for his relationships.
Don't try to be one of the guys. He liked you for you who you are, that includes being female, you don’t see him dating any of his man friends.
Don't expect the bromance to ever end. Men in a bromance have known each other for a long time, so the men consider themselves to be almost family.
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