Evans Darius
Ms. Hoeb
English 12
1 October 2014
Grief and Loss
Have you ever had pain inside you for so long and didn’t know how to deal with it, talk about it, or even accept the reality of the situation? Grieving is a personal process that has no time limit, nor one “right” way to do it. (Axelrod) There are 5 stages to grief and loss. The more significance the loss the more intense the grief will be. (Smith and Segal).
Denial is the first stage in grief; it’s a defense mechanism that buffers the immediate response. People tend to hide from the facts. The intense emotion is deflected from our vulnerable core, redirected and expressed instead as anger the second step. Bargaining is the next step, which is the weaker line of defense to protect us from painful reality. Next step is Depression, which there are 2 types of. First is reaction to practical implicating relating to the loss. The other is our quiet preparation to separate and to allow our loved one leave in peace. Last is acceptance, which is a gift not offered to everyone? This phase is marked by withdrawal and calm.
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Others find grief to be constant, or a series of good and bad times. Do Not! Argue with others about whatever you’re grieving over is acceptable. Accept the fact that the best support your grief may come from won’t be a friend or family member. Feeling frightened, sad, or lonely is a normal reaction of the death of a pet. Trying to ignore your pain or keep it from your memorization will only make it worse in the long run. A child coping with pet loss needs to see you express your own grief at the loss of the pet or they won’t know how to act about it. Remind your child that they weren’t responsible for the pet’s death or you will see a side of your child unexpected. Seniors coping with pet loss need to try and find new meaning and joy in life. Be sure to boost your health with exercise. (Robinson et
Sadly, life is a terminal illness, and dying is a natural part of life. Deits pulls no punches as he introduces the topic of grief with the reminder that life’s not fair. This is a concept that most of us come to understand early in life, but when we’re confronted by great loss directly, this lesson is easily forgotten. Deits compassionately acknowledges that grief hurts and that to deny the pain is to postpone the inevitable. He continues that loss and grief can be big or small and that the period of mourning afterward can be an unknowable factor early on. This early assessment of grief reminded me of Prochaska and DiClemente’s stages of change, and how the process of change generally follows a specific path.
Grieving is the outward expression of your loss. Every individual grief is likely to be expressed physically, emotionally, and psychologically. For instance, crying is a physical expression, while depression is a psychological expression. It is very important to allow the client to express these feelings. Often, death is a subject that is avoided, ignored or denied. At first it may be helpful
Breavement is handeled differently in different generations. Weather it is a kid that has a terminal illness or an elderly person who is diagnosed with a terminal illness, each breave differently. Breavement deals with not just someone clsoe dying but, someone themselvs who is diagnosed with a life threatening illness.
Individually, everyone has their own methods of dealing with situations and emotions regardless of any positive or negative connotation affixed to them. One prime example of this comes with grief. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross in her 1969 book “On Death and Dying” suggests that there are five stages of mourning and grief that are universal and, at one point or another, experienced by people from all walks of life. These stages, in no particular order, are as follows: Denial and Isolation, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and finally Acceptance. Each individual person works through these stages in different orders for varying levels of time and intensity, but most if not all are necessary to “move on.” In order for positive change to occur following a loss, one must come to terms with not only the event but also themselves.
When we encounter the death of a loved one, it’s hard to understand and realized that the person is gone. According to Elizabeth Kubler Ross, individuals enter different stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and
One summer I awoke to the chirping of my cell phone. I was really confused because I had a bunch of notifications. On a normal day I usually only have a couple. When I checked to see what they were, I discovered that they were all concerning my best friend. They all said “I’m so sorry for what happened.” I got really confused and stumbled down the stairs to talk to my mom. When I saw her, she had tears running down her face and she said “He’s gone.” My emotions hit me like a runaway train and I immediately went into a depression. The grieving process had just started and it was awful. Eventually, I knew it was necessary in order to heal. Grief marks our memories with sadness and pain; however, this way of coping is the essential key to moving on with our lives.
People cope with the loss of a loved one in many ways. For some, the experience may lead to personal growth, even though it is a difficult and trying time. There is no right way of coping with death. The way a person grieves depends on the personality of that person and the relationship with the person who has died. How a person copes with grief is affected by the person's cultural and religious background, coping skills, mental history, support systems, and the person's social and financial status.
It is common for those experiencing grief to deny the death altogether. Many people do this by avoiding situations and places that remind them of the deceased (Leming & Dickinson, 2016). However, by simply avoiding the topic of death and pain, the mourner only achieves temporary relief while in turn creating more permanent lasting agony (Rich, 2005). In this stage, mourners will begin to feel the full weight of the circumstance. Whether the death of a loved one was sudden or long-term, survivors will feel a full range of emotions, such as sadness, guilt, anger, frustration, hopelessness, or grief. While many of these emotions can cause serious suffering, it is important for the survivor to feel whatever emotions come up and deal with those feelings, rather than trying to suppress any
In 1969 Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, a psychiatrist, published the Pioneering book On Death and Dying. The work acquainted the world with the grieving process, called the five stages of grief. Kübler-Ross gathered her research from studying individuals with terminal cancer (Johnson, 2007). The first stage of the grieving process is denial. In this stage the person refuses to believe that their loved one is deceased, a common thought during this period is, “This can’t be happening to me” (Johnson, 2007).The second stage of the grieving process is anger. In this level the person becomes frustrated with their circumstances, a customary complaint is “Why is this happening to me?” (Johnson, 2007). The third stage of the grieving process is bargaining. At this point the individual hopes that they can prevent their grief, this typically involves bartering with a higher power, and an ordinary observance during this time is “I will do anything to have them back” (Johnson, 2007). The fourth and most identifiable stage of grief is depression. This phase is habitually the lengthiest as...
William Worden (1996) explains that grieving is the adaption to a loss. After researching Worden’s theory it is my understanding that there are four tasks a person must achieve in order for the process of mourning to be concluded and the “equilibrium to be re-established” (Worden,1996). In his theory, Worden clarifies that the tasks are in no particular order. Worden also recognizes that some individuals may have to revisit certain tasks over time, that grief is a personal experience, and that it is difficult to regulate a time frame for completing the grief tasks.
All of my life, until I was eighteen years old, I didn’t understand the concept of grieving. Grief just hasn’t been something I’ve ever had to experience before. Because of my lack of experience I had no understanding of what grieving felt like. All of his changed for me on July 29th.
Everyone has or will experience a loss of a loved one sometime in their lives. It is all a part of the cycle of life and death. The ways each person copes with this loss may differ, but according to Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s novel On Death and Dying, a person experiences several stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and, finally, acceptance. There is no set time for a person to go through each stage because everyone experiences and copes with grief differently. However, everyone goes through the same general feelings of grief and loss. There are also sections in Kahlil Gibran’s “The Prophet” that connect to the process of grieving: “On Pain,” “On Joy and Sorrow,” and “On Talking.” Kahlil Gibran’s “The Prophet” reflects on Kübler-Ross’s model of the different stages of grief and loss.
Every single person has their own individual way of expressing their emotions.When I lose wifi connection or when I check my pockets and I don’t feel my phone I feel like I am going to have an anxiety attack. Little meaningless circumstances cause me to freak out on a regular basis. If everything that is important to me: friends, family is taken away from me, I have no idea what I would do because I need their company, their advice and their presence. It scares me to think that one day I can lose everything that I care for, and I personally don’t think that I can cope with a death of a loved one. Death is a scary thing to think about.
Parents go through a wave of emotions when losing a child. They are not only in disbelief and denial, but also feel angry and guilty. Some parents find themselves wanting to talk about it, while others find it easier to talk about the death of friends or other family members rather than their child’s. When a child dies this disrupts the parent’s health and well-being during the hardest phase of bereavement and for long periods over the course of their lives (Hong, Floyd & Seltzer, 2010).
Hall (2016) explains the grieving process from a loss as the transition journey, a healing journey which consists of three stages, Endings, Neutral Zone, and New Beginnings. Every loss in our lives constitutes a change and every change requires a cycle of healing to face the consequences of that change (Hall, 2016). These stages are not chronological in nature, nor does each person experience each stage only once, everyone grieves in their own individualized manner.